Making A Difference...

Ministry Update January 2012

2012-01-08T12:11:00.002+08:00

Once again, we ushered in a new year. This year is already sofilled with many challenges. On the national scene, everyone is speculating acoming general election and that steer us to uncertainty; with muchanticipation for changes.

I was with my sister’s family for the first few days of thenew year, seeing my youngest nephew to standard one. He was so excited on thefirst day but could not wake up for the next two days. In fact, on the secondday, he walked into school like a zombie! Entering formal school…that was kindof nostalgic; the carefree days. Life seemed much simpler when you only haveone concern – pass your exam!

I look forward to seeing God moving in our nation throughthe church for the next 51 weeks in 2012. Of course there’s the scare ofend-of-the-world “prophecy” from the extinct Mayan civilization; something thechurch will prove them wrong. Closer home, the maturing Malaysian church needsto be bolder as we arrive at this important stage – what with the changes ofpolitical landscape to enter into a new era.

I’m hoping to continue my studies soon. If pause for toolong it will lose its momentum. I’m targeting to complete this year, graduatingthis November.

It’s a lazy few weeks with one festival after another. So,let me greet all of you a very happy and prosperous Chinese New Year 2012 whichis in about 2 weeks’ time. Please continue to join me in prayer for the OA/teachingministry:

1. The proposed meeting to initiate formation ofthe first BM Bible Seminary in Peninsular Malaysia is on hold, pending responsefrom our Methodist partner

2. Kem Pelajar-pelajar Kristian Borneo 26-28Jan: acamp for trainee teachers from the Maktab Perguruan. The CF advisor plannedthis camp because East Malaysian students are not returning home for the CNYholidays. The camp will be held in CCC, Batu Ferringhi and open to all traineeteachers from all Maktab Perguruan in the northern states. I’m teaching 3sessions on Thursday, 26Jan while Ps Lee Mei Lee is teaching 2 sessions thenext day on Spiritual Warfare

3. SAM Ipoh Diploma class will start this year withme teaching on Missions Strategy 6 till 10Feb. I didn’t realize it’s a weekwith public holidays along it (5 &7), thus, traffic will probably be heavy along the North-South Highway

4. March will be the first trip of the year to theOA village and I’m bring in the team from Emmanuel Harvest Center for a day trip

5. April/May: planning to bring teams into the OAvillage – from a Lutheran church and an Anglican Church

6. End of May is the Youth Camp Cum Mission Tripfor Wesley Methodist Taiping. Please pray for this trip. It’s the first time we’redoing this and a few churches are waiting to see how it goes as they are alsokeen on such an idea

7. June: I’ll be teaching an ATC class on Intro toNT; I’ve allocated March till May for the 4-module course in Anglicanism andassigned Anglican pastors to teach (because I’m not too “Anglican”)

8. August: the first time SAM is trying a 2-weekdiploma class and this year we are holding it in Penang (at Anglican TrainingCenter, Penang)for 2 consecutive weeks – Ps Sam Surendran teaching one class followed bymyself the following week

9. September: planning for a teaching trip to Makassar

10. November: planning for another teaching trip,but this time to Sabah

11. December: festive season – slow down…

Thus far, that’s the tentative bird’s view of this year’scalendar. It will fill up with much more activities and I’m looking forward to thechallenges ahead. Join me once again this year as we press on to attempt greatthings for God and expect great things from God.

Phil 1: 3-6 (KJV) I thank my God upon every remembrance of you, Always in every

prayer of mine for you all making request with joy, Foryour fellowship in the gospel

from the first day until now; Being confident of thisvery thing, that he which hath begun

a good work in you will perform ituntil the day of Jesus Christ:

Ministry Update Dec 2011

2011-12-04T11:38:00.001+08:00

So here it is, the final month of 2011 and everyone has more or less geared into the festive mood. Christmas decorations are already everywhere, especially in the shopping malls. Churches have begun their caroling rounds. A series of Christmas dinners will soon begin.

As I looked back the previous month, activities filled just half of November and the other half, I saw myself already pretty restless. I was uninspired to prepare my messages in December and many people are already busy planning for Christmas, which means, I’m too relaxed. But it was a blessed morning when I met an old friend. We were in varsity together and honestly, I could hardly recognize her. Oh…I didn’t tell her that. But it struck me when we were discussing about the OA ministry. We were together in the Anthropology and Sociology (ANSOS) class; every year the ANSOS department organized a trip to the OA village. So, this friend of mine was relating how the trip impacted her and the question came, “You were with us in that trip, right?” Sheepishly I replied, “No, I stayed away from the jungle…as much as I could; until now after God “zapped” me!” Well, that’s the truth…

It’s a relaxing month for me but anxious as I have to wait for my partners to start and confirm activities for the next year. I continue to seek your partnership in prayer as we conclude this year and preparing to greet the new year. Please pray for:
1. Trip to the OA village on 10Dec with GBC’s CG (CL’s group)
2. Bahasa Pastors Fellowship Christmas Dinner on 20Dec
3. Christmas services in churches 24/25Dec, I’ll be
a. Preaching @ JCMC 8am 25Dec
b. Preaching @ FLC 10am 25Dec
4. Sekolah Akitab Malaysia (SAM) partnership with Seminari Teologi Malaysia (administrative procedures)
a. SAM students to diligently attend/complete due assignments
b. Center coordinators to wrap up records of the academic year
5. Plans/meetings for the formation of the first Bahasa Malaysia Seminary in Peninsular Malaysia, in partnership with PMSM and others we intend to invite aboard

Finally, I take this opportunity to thank all of you for your love and support, especially in prayer and encouragement. A very blessed Christmas and Happy New Year to all of you. May each one of us be inspired this Christmas season to fervently serve Him in this nation to bring the glory of our God to shine brightly in this land and beyond.

Ministry Update October/November

2011-10-28T17:10:00.000+08:00

Time sure flies…we are already gearing up for Christmas and soon preparing to greet the new year. I am writing this update in Ringlet, Cameron Highlands; no, I’m not on holiday though today is a public holiday (Deepavali). I am teaching a class in Church Admin and the students have been great. A bit boring here with the constant rain and super poor internet reception; but yesterday we visited an OA settlement in the BOH tea estate nearby. Prospects are good to network with the SIB OA churches here to expand the school. There are about 10 SIB OA churches in this region and the pastor we met was very keen to work with us. I’m trusting God to provide the necessary while I continue to dream big for Him.

A couple of days ago, I was very encouraged to receive an unexpected phone call. The caller wanted to invite me to preach at her daughter’s wedding. She told me that her daughter specially requested for me to preach on her special day. It was such an honor and encouragement to know there’s someone in some church who thinks I’m a good preacher; unfortunately the date was not appropriate. I’m scheduled to be in Medan 1-7 Dec for a preaching circuit in 4 churches to kick-start the Christmas season. And I’m now wandering why 3Dec is such a popular date. So far, I’ve received 4 invites to different events by different groups on this very date.

The BM school is progressing well. The OA pastors pursuing their studies in MBTS have officially transferred to SAM. I’m pretty upset when I received an email from the academic dean with a request to help them correct rumors that the BM dept in MBTS is closing. Upset because they are too sensitive and insecure; upset that they do not know the BM students well. Hanging around with those fellas, I know they always joke, but somebody must have overheard them joking and took it too personally. I’m disappointed that certain insecure individual is still trying to push blame on me for his inability to execute the ministry properly.

We will be meeting with STM personnel early Nov to elaborate on an official MoU. In the meantime, our center in Penang (Bayan Point) will launch its second class, a repeat of the course conducted in Prai earlier this year. If things go well, we will greet 2012 with a center in Prai (mainland) and Bayan Point (island) for SAM Penang; a center in Ringlet, Cameron Highlands and Ipoh for SAM Ipoh. We also hope to begin sending final year students for optional short-term internship practical in Sarawak. Pray for us as we seek to grow this ministry. The church in Malaysia is the responsibility of Malaysian Christians; and we seek to train and raise local ministers to minister to their own people groups. Pray for the Gua Musang center that they will grow strong and stable in their pool of students and teachers.

As of now, I have all registered OA students sponsored for the course fees of their entire programs. 6 students transferred from MBTS have yet to be sponsored. More students are expected for next year, so our SAM Student Adoption program will continue to invite partnership from individuals and churches. I will soon send out updates to all sponsors; just waiting for the final class of the year to close in November.

My study program is still on hold. The director of Graduate School is still looking for a replacement to supervise my dissertation. But I’m glad to know that plan B is he’ll assume that position if no suitable candidate is found.

Ministry Update Sept/Oct 2011

2011-10-01T22:40:00.000+08:00

September opened with a week- long class in Ipoh. I was in YMCA the entire week with little entertainment at night after class. Being unfamiliar with Ipoh town, I stayed in my room and spent most of the time browsing the net. That’s when I picked up another addictive game in FB. The class in Penang center was put on hold for the week while I was in Ipoh and it will come to a close early October.

I was in Kinta Valley area 3x in September and will be repeating that frequency this month. I remember bringing the LOGOS Hope team of three into the OA villages middle of September. It was tiring having to interpret for 3 members and running here and there in between so they were able to converse with the locals. But I remembered how they were sharing about how God had financially provided for the Ship. If I remembered it right, it was previously a ship transporting cars and needed euro 500 million to refurbish in 5 years but God’s intervention changed that into USD 28 million in 2 years. I remembered that while I was interpreting that, at the back of my mind I was struggling, questioning God about His providence. I have experienced His providence in small measures here and there in my life but I’m now in the midst of asking for sponsorship for my OA friends. I have great plans for them, I share it with them, and they are just as excited as I am. Still, we hope together for the day when we can carry out these plans which obviously need financing. That day, I was grumbling in my mind before the Lord. Intellectually, I know God provides, but I have not experience it in any significant manner. The next day when I arrived at my office, there was a letter for the church addressed to me. When I opened it, a cheque fell out. When I saw the amount, I was numbed for awhile. After I pulled myself together, I can only cry. And I cried, and I cried…the letter came from someone I heard about in a church in Penang but I’ve never met this person. The letter stated that the Lord had blessed his family and they would like to share the blessing by sponsoring the OA students. Out of curiosity, how much do you think a stranger can give to a ministry they only know from a brochure; to a person they may have heard of but never met? I leave you to ponder the amount. But it was substantial…it made me cry! My OA students are so blessed and I’m so happy.

The last Sunday of September was another “historic” moment. There was a crowd of about 700 gathered in Gopeng Square where the OA church celebrated their 15th Anniversary. Rain poured and guests came from various places. The church leaders were dressed so smartly while the clergy had their official attire on. It was humid, it was pretty uncomfortable as the formalities of the service stretched longer than anticipated. Hunger caused discomfort, especially when some food was already on the table. But it was a memorable evening. Tiring for me, traveling to Gopeng from Penang and returning to Penang after the service and forced to wake up the next morning to a cool, sleepy day to attend the Upper North Clergy meeting. But it was worth it, it really was.

October has several trips to the OA villages: one with a Methodist group and another with an Anglican group. End of October is another class with the Ipoh students who had it planned as a retreat and we will be meeting in Ringlet. Please pray for us; for a time of mutual learning, fellowship, and outreach.

Most importantly, I request prayer for my studies. My thesis supervisor withdrew as he is undergoing some medical treatment. I know God has appointed a candidate to replace him. Please pray that we find this person soon. I hope to complete my studies by next year in line with my plans to start offering advance degree programs for the BM school. Papers make a difference, what to do? That’s how things work…

Again, thank you for your partnership in ministry.

PS: Praise the Lord, I have a new toy…Asus Eee Pad Transformer, a 10.1’ android pad and I no longer need to print sermon note – save the trees! Got a good deal for it, though I was waiting for someone to bless me with one…

Ministry Update Aug/Sept 2011

2011-09-02T17:07:00.002+08:00

1Sept2011

September…it is similar with August where my schedule was full even before entering into the month. But I’m thrilled to see how my days are fully utilized for His glory. I just got back from a youth camp in Tanjong Bungah. When I stepped into the dorm, I suddenly wondered to myself why I turned down a speaking engagement at a family camp in Lake Toba…I mean, I could have been putting up in a fancy hotel, overlooking the volcanic lake in the cool of the day but instead, I was forced to patiently wait for each meal while running under the scorching sun beside dirty Penang beaches and waiting in line to use the shower. Well, it was a youth camp…enough said. But I do realize that I will readily accept ministering in English, rather than in Malay (Bahasa Malaysia or Bahasa Indonesia). Perhaps, it is because I find myself not fluent enough to pray efficiently in Malay. Besides, the nature of what I do really requires me to juggle between the two languages.

The Sekolah Alkitab Malaysia (SAM) Penang center has started a class in Bayan Point, apart from the earlier one in Prai. This class sees more Indonesian students and I am caught between Bahasa Malaysia and Bahasa Indonesia…who says the two languages is similar? It’s big enough the difference that I have to be extra cautious of its terms and vocabulary. Nevertheless, this is indeed a learning experience.

Next week 5-9Sept, I have a class in Ipoh. Here, have to revert back to Bahasa Malaysia. After a week-long of classes, there may be a meeting of SAM council in JB which, I’m still contemplating of whether to participate. This is considering my tight schedule. Apart from classes on Monday and Wednesday nights for the 9 sessions class in Bayan Point, with breaks for the long holiday and my Ipoh class insert, there are trips to the OA villages with one just upon my return from Ipoh with the LOGOS team. No, I’ve not visited the ship, and I doubt if I will ever have time for that, what with class preparations, etc. I do not have any preaching engagements in BJAC but have several in other churches in Penang. Good break for me, really…But I must admit that last Sunday, 28Aug was an interesting Sunday where I preached in SIB Georgetown. Yes, there is a SIB church in town and the members are all from Sarawak…well, the church was started by a former student who has graduated and returned to Sarawak. After the service, I proceeded to preach in Christ Church BM Service, where the members are from Sabah…well, the person in charge is from Sabah.

Please pray with me, especially for my studies. I’ve started chapter one of my 80, 000 words dissertation. In fact, I’ve sent the draft of chapter one to my supervisor and awaiting his comments before proceeding further. However, I just found out that he is now undergoing treatment for a re-lapse in his cancer illness. So, I’m now caught – what should I do? My second supervisor is back in the US and busy playing grandfather to his twins grandchildren. Hope he gets back soon to advice me how to proceed. If my second supervisor decides to “take over” the supervision process, it’s going to be a lot easier because he’s based in MBTS while my main supervisor is based in Singapore.

Please pray with me too, for the OA student pastors/leaders of SAM Gua Musang and Ipoh who need financial aid to pursue their basic Christian/theological education. Responses are coming in but not enough to see all through their programs.

Please pray with me for October. It is still too relax and I need to fill it up with activities. Thus far I only have activities in 4 of its 5 weekends besides a week long class in Ipoh at the last week of October.

Once again, thank you for your partnership in ministry…

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Ministry Update July/August 2011

2011-07-30T12:26:00.002+08:00

I just emailed my first draft of chapter one to my thesis supervisor yesterday. It is exciting and anxious, to be taking this step towards a long, tedious effort of an 80,000 words journey. And I have to constantly remind myself why I’m doing this – I can only lead people till where I have been and if I have high hopes for them, then I better know how far I myself am capable.

The partnership of SAM-STM is progressing well. Despite its slow momentum but I believe God works matters in a pace He knows best for all involved. The Anglican Training Center is also slowly falling in place. The official opening is scheduled to be on 13August and classes are starting. Actually, just one – and with one student. But, let’s not despise humble beginnings. A 2-day seminar is also planned for September. The Chinese and Tamil modules have yet to start while the BM module is still contemplating when to begin, this month or the next. But then again, the BM module had a head-start because it comes under the “management” of SAM.

Due to a postponement of class in Ipoh, I only have one outstation trip in August – to Kampar for the Synod. I never liked change of schedules, especially last minute changes. Yet, I must “force” myself to accommodate the working style of different people in my team. So, August appears pretty relaxing (enough) for awhile. But things do pop up and sometimes at the last minute. I’m ready for the 3 overlapping/continuous classes of English/BM classes in Penang/Ipoh in these 3 months (July, August, September). With the start of my dissertation write-up, I will need to factor in time for this too. Then, the Bible Society’s translation work. The team just completed the first draft of Luke. Everyone seems every enthusiastic and they work so fast. I have to discipline myself to keep up with their pace. In the process, I’ve been delaying my editing work for ICM’s BM module. Due to all these, I’m too glad to offer LOGOS Hope team to come to preach/share on my speaking date to relieve me in September.

There are enquiries but yet to receive actual contributions to the SAM school’s student adoption project. This is a fund-raising project, aimed to raise funds as scholarships to enable the indigenous student pastors/church leaders acquire quality Christian/theological education. These students are mainly small-scale farmers in the interior earning meager cash income. The BM churches/outreaches are growing so fast, there’s a lack of funds to finance (even) the ministry. And they are very eager to partner with urban churches to develop their community, both church and non-church community.

Please pray with me for the development of the OA/BM work; for the Lord of Harvest to raise good workers to be trained into exceptional workers; for the Lord of Providence to provide every necessary resources – financial and human resources – as we grow the School.

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Ministry Update June/July 2011

2011-07-01T12:24:00.000+08:00

So it’s official, we have crossed the first half of the year. Things are picking up and I am excited. As I looked at my schedule, I must admit I had a great month of learning and discovery. It started with the youth visit to the OA villages, followed by the Bible Translation workshop, with a week in Ipoh full of activities, and the final week of June filled with meetings.

I had especially learned much from the translation workshop; especially, in rediscovering my Malaysian identity. I did not realized how much we’ve been influenced by Indonesian culture, even indirectly through our usage of the Indonesian Bible which is readily available as compared to the Malaysian version. It is a privilege to be a part of this project to embark on the effort to produce a new Bahasa Malaysia version of the Bible. Even with the little I can afford and offer, I feel very honored to contribute a little to this spectacular project. More so, when I hold in my hands the “stamped” Bible – stamped by KDN & serial-numbered. I believe for us who use English Bibles, this hold little significance. For me, as a missiologist taught to function in just about any version, what matters is contextualizing the message to the target audience in a manner most understood by them. But as I minister among the malay speaking churches (here I mean Bahasa Indonesia and Bahasa Malaysia) I realize, as Malaysian Christians, we really need a version to reflect our identity.

A week filled with meetings flows into the next month. I have many things to prepare. The Anglican Training Center will hold its first English class on 18th where I’ll be teaching on the Introduction to the OT. Then I also need to prepare for its official opening 13th Aug. Following that is a BM class in Ipoh in mid Aug where I’ll be teaching. The weekend after the week in Ipoh is a short period of rest before departing to Kampar for the Synod meeting. Looks like it’ll be 3 days of sleeping with my eyes open through the boring speeches and endless debates. I think I’ll bring my netbook or tablet pc along to work silently.

Enough of diocesan matters, I’m looking forward to another trip into the jungles next weekend with another youth group…on the weekend Bersih 2.0 is planned. I hope I don’t miss exciting news while dwelling among the trees…no, it’s not THAT bad. Preaching engagements are lined up. It’s another marathon-like schedule. Thought of accepting a “working holiday” speaking in a church camp in Lake Toba end of Aug, but it clashed with another engagement I had earlier committed. Aise…but do pray with me for:
1. The training center and its programs (endorsed by STM) in all 4 languages but I’m only dealing with English & BM
2. The fund-raising project (SAM Student Adoption Program) I just launched in an effort to raise funds to help the OA church pastors/leaders to be equipped theologically. Plz pray for the BM program and wisdom to do a better planning job next year for all centers (Gua Musang, Penang (island & mainland), Ipoh)
3. The speaking engagements in various churches
4. The OA visits and various teams/churches to partner our OA work
5. The Christmas speaking engagement – this, I’m praying. It came unexpectedly and being one attracted to challenge, I have sort of, agreed to it. It’ll be a 7-day speaking circuit through North Sumatra as a prelude to Christmas programs for the North Sumatra churches
6. The dissertation write-up. I’m starting this next phase for my study program. Kindly pray alongside me
7. Discipline – that in the midst of all busyness, I will always remember the reason for each task and be well-disciplined to put Him first and above all

Once again, I thank you for your partnership in ministry.

SB

Ministry Update May/June 2011

2011-06-03T16:09:00.002+08:00

Ahhh…a blink of an eye and we have almost conclude the first half of 2011. May had been a busy month, but was filled with exciting activities till I got my appointments mixed up. End of May was a trip to Kg Pergum in Simpang Pulai with Ipoh AOG Cantonese Church and about a week later was a trip to Kg Geruntum and Kg Kepayang in Gopeng with Jubilee Outreach, Penang Youth Group. It was also another round of preaching marathon with 11 speaking engagements through 7 weekends.

June sees 2 outstation trips. One is to a Bible Translation Workshop in KL on the first week and to Ipoh on the third week, bringing a teacher to teach a diploma class for SAM. That will allow me to do some admin work for the Ipoh center while visiting the OA villages and meet OA friends to interview them for my dissertation. The last week is scheduled for the first BM class in Anglican Training Center (ATC). I’ve yet to start actively publicize this class as I’ve been busy. Besides, I’m still chasing my printer for the brochures. It feels so lonely with no one sharing the similar burden and passion for this BM teaching ministry. Inquiries come but not translated to actual registration. But the English class will start in mid July after the Mandarin class in early July. Tamil is scheduled to start its first class in early September.

July will see another trip to the OA villages with another youth group. I’m hoping to start my dissertation write-up in July itself or I’ll be behind schedule. I’m planning to complete my study by end of next year. August is another busy month. ATC official opening has been re-scheduled to 13 August.

The highlight in May/June was obviously the OA village visits. Managed to visit Kg Kepayang, the much anticipated kampong visit. I think it is these visits that bring joy and excitement, besides the satisfaction and gladness in an otherwise monotonous ministry. Watching people grow in the Lord, escalating passion for ministry, and excitement in church related work…these are moments to cherish. The grocery store in the village is doing extremely well. I met with the coordinator recently and he told me he is considering re-stocking 4x a week, instead of 3x a week because business is good. I’m still looking into helping a local pastor with his kampong chicken project. At least to lighten his livelihood burden so he can focus on his studies and ministry.

I have photos of the recent OA visits posted on my facebook. Hope you take sometime to browse through them to see how exciting home missions is…

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

Ministry Update April/May 2011

2011-04-26T09:58:00.000+08:00

April is a busy month that conveniently leads into May. Being a work-oriented person, I’m obviously thrilled to see the many entries in my monthly planner. Without realizing, I discovered I am on another preaching marathon; 11 consecutive speaking engagements through 8 weekends and 2 out-station trips in May and in June; traveling out-station at least once a month till October. Sounds so exciting, right? Yes, it is but age is catching up and I can no longer read small prints without effort.

I really do not know if the problem is me or my colleagues but I recently find myself easily irritated when my colleague is not moving at the same pace as myself. Or another irritation I recently encounter is when someone keeps calling on me to teach how to use tablet computer or GPS. I almost wanted to scream, read the owner’s manual yourself!

I am in Ipoh right now and a bit disappointed at the class turn-up. Perhaps the local coordinator is not aggressive enough. Or simply, he's been sleeping on the job! The BM class in Penang center concluded at the start of the Holy Week with 8 students completing this first module. Next class is in July. Right now in Ipoh is the first diploma class of the new curriculum and attendance is still not certain. Maybe it's because the local coordinator himself is not sure of the structure despite numerous explanation. Really...you can take a person out of the jungle but you cannot take the jungle out of the person.

Besides the continuous speaking engagements in every weekend in May, there will be 2 trips to the OA villages in later part of May. This is followed by a translation workshop in early June, followed by a working trip to Ipoh in later part of June.

Several ground work is in progress for the Anglican Training Center. A new signboard should be up and displaying brightly by mid-May. Classroom equipment should also arrive by then. This will consume my time in setting up the classrooms and library. Also needing attention is the official opening scheduled for 2nd July. Hopefully, we can soon start offering classes in 4 languages; English, Bahasa, Mandarin, Tamil. I know Bahasa is already on-going. Mandarin has some plans already. I will need to start planning for the English schedule while the Tamil work will have to rely solely on my colleague who is busy running around many places. This center will offer basic Christian ministry training in affiliation with STM. This will surely present an alternative for those seeking theological/Christian training in an urban, easily accessible campus.

Please join us in prayer as we venture into exciting times in this nation.

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

Ministry Update March/April 2011

2011-03-29T11:59:00.000+08:00

March started full of activities and they were significant activities. Some Upper North Anglican pastors met to discuss the possibility of starting an Anglican Bahasa church on the island to cater to Anglicans from East Malaysia, who are here for study or work. Then there was the meeting with an Indonesian pastor who expressed an interest to partner Bagan Jermal Anglican Church (BJAC) to start an Indonesian service to cater to the Indonesians who are in Penang for medical purposes (at Adventist Hospital), besides the fact that the Indonesian Consulate is just around the corner.

March also saw the start of efforts towards establishing the Anglican Training Center, a center to house TEE programs for lay leaders/pastors. Also planned was skill-related programs/seminars. And these were not all that came together with month number three. The Sekolah Alkitab Malaysia (SAM) Penang center started its first class with its new curriculum in St Mark’s, Prai with an average attendance of 10 students. Classes are still on-going for the study of the Gospel of Mark as part of the New Testament study requirement. I also began my monthly missions training session with members of St Mark’s Prai that will continue till September. I’m excited to be a part of their missions efforts with the goal to be equipped to do outreach work in South Thailand. They also started their Thai language class with a Thai student from MBTS. They are hoping to pick up basic conversational Thai to enable them to function in their target group of Southern Thais.

BJAC also went to an OA village. We “closed shop” one Saturday and went to Pawong. There were 11 of us in the van with one participant from St Paul as the driver, one from St George’s as an observer, and another whom I never got to know which church he was affiliated to. We were joined by another 13 in 3 cars from FLC. As far as I’ve been informed, everyone had a great time and there are requests to plan another longer trip there. As to the situation in the village, the grocery store project is progressing better than anticipated. Their initial capital has been used and they are receiving requests to sell new items. I’m seeking for sponsors to invest in this ministry and let them run it as they deem fit. Profit will be re-invested and they will roll on their own. Besides being a source of income for the local church, it also serves as a developmental project and an outreach where customers can get to know the church.

Then there was the SAM Ipoh graduation I attended last week. The event was sandwiched by 2 meetings, before & after the graduation service. The Council met to decide on an autonomous style of governance for the various SAM centers. This is because some centers want to affiliate with STM while some with MBS. For myself, coming under the umbrella of the Anglican church, I was instructed to work towards affiliation with STM. There’s actually no choice as I’m obligated to the “canonical obedience” enshrined in my appointment. But I am very glad to witness and participate in the discussion towards drawing up future plans and goals for SAM to be an independent Bible School, standing on its own with its own accreditation and not having to lean on another entity to gain recognition of our programs. However, this is not something that can be accomplished overnight. Perhaps, it will take another 3-5 years. I’m pushing for the others to set a deadline so we can measure our progress. It will be in September before we start elaborating on this.

The following day after the graduation service I had a meeting with a church in Ipoh to establish partnership in our OA ministry. I’m so glad for this. When I returned to Penang I had a meeting with another church to discuss similar possibilities. I’m really excited. These two are AG churches. In fact, I am still very overwhelmed by the extent of potentials and possibilities in this ministry. I really pray God will raise someone to come along side me soon. At the rate this is going, soon I will not be able to attend to everything completely by myself.

Another interesting event in March was the 50th Anniversary of my school, CGL. It was sort of a last minute thing that I finally made it to the dinner, attended by over 1000 guests and students on the school field itself. As it was on a Saturday night, I was obviously late for the dinner. It was supposed to start at 6.30pm but I arrived at about 7.30pm and dinner was not yet served. Traffic was bad due to this very event. I arrived to meet a friend who showed me to the table, supposedly attended by friends of my class year. But I could hardly recognize some of them. There were 2 ladies at a nearby table who came over to exchange greetings. They recognized me but their faces just do not register in my mind at all. I came back from this event a bit shaken. Many people could recognize me but I could not recognize them at all. It was as if a part of my life had been erased from my memory and that was frightening. I kept asking myself, how come they don’t register in my mind? In fact, I have several facebook friends that I added without recalling who they are but they insisted we know each other from school, CGL. This continues to puzzle me greatly. I keep asking myself why and how come. I completely have no recollection of some friends in school. And these are individuals who claimed that we were pretty good friends. In a way, it is scary. I think I can remember pretty well events in university days. Earlier years seem too dim. It’s like my hard disk drive crashed and was re-formatted and not all data was restored.

April is right around the corner. There are several preaching engagements, and after Easter is a week-long trip to Ipoh for the SAM Ipoh’s diploma program class. Though I’m not teaching, I will attend to this first class and explain the new curriculum to the students. Other days of the week I hope to do 2 things: build better rapport with Ipoh churches while exploring partnership possibilities and to continue interviews for my thesis research. Ending the week will be a trip to Gua Musang, Kelantan. I’ve been looking forward to a chance to visit this place and I’m glad the opportunity has arrived. The local leaders are also waiting for my visit to extend the efforts that is being done in the Simpang Pulai/Gopeng OA Villages in terms of social development and Christian education.

The SAM center in Ipoh has also started their new curriculum this month with Gua Musang center planning to launch their first course in April. Also, kindly pray for the Anglican Training Center, located just next to my office, that aims to offer TEE programs in English, Mandarin, Tamil, and BM.

Once again, thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update March 2011

2011-03-01T11:06:00.002+08:00

It’s been a quick month full of activities. First, the CNY break where I “locked” myself indoors to escape the stress of Penang traffic. Just concluded last week was the SEA Anglican Provincial Gathering. Never thought I’ll enjoy an Anglican function but I did. Actually, I discovered that there are Anglican pastors from other diocese who are “fun” and it’s not all dull traditions. Don’t get me wrong. Traditions are good… if it serve a purpose.

Entering into the third month sees the start of the BM school in Penang and Ipoh. Not sure yet when exactly Gua Musang is starting their classes although the coordinator said it should be in March too. The Ulu Tiram center is still pending. The coordinator is busy being a daddy.

Later in the month (12th), I’ll be bringing a team of blind participants to an OA village. A friend asked in a surprised tone…what can they see? Anyway, I sort of forced them to play a role in the trip. 4 of them will be sharing their testimony and 3 of them are blind. I have a van load going and we will be joined by FLC to this “exposure” day trip. Please pray for us: good weather, logistics, those ministering (BJAC sharing to adults & FLC ministering to the children), the journey, etc.

The grocery store project at Pawong is apparently doing well. Stock is already running low. But I’ll go see the place and study the needs before I update further. Anyone interested to partner development work with the OA community? There are several other projects needing partnership with urban church/individuals. Pray over it and let me know. A little monetary investment from our part is a huge contribution to them. I have 2 chicken projects pending needing investment of approximately RM5000 a year for 2 years. These are all located within Perak/Pahang and we can go visit anytime.

Kindly pray also for the Bible translation workshop scheduled for early June by Bible Society of Malaysia. It was postponed from December last year. As we all know there is a tremendous need for contemporary and contextualized translation into Bahasa Malaysia. The present one, the only version, is not accurate at all and Malaysians have been relying on Indonesian bibles in BM services/churches.

Well, once again let me end with this familiar quote…

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

Thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update 2 Feb 2011

2011-02-02T14:13:00.002+08:00

Almost at the blink of an eye, we have completed the first month of 2011. Everyone is still in their holiday mood as we prepare to celebrate Chinese New Year tomorrow. In fact, January passed by so swiftly I had almost no opportunity to reflect upon the activities planned in the new year. It’s like in daze and I’m not sure I am fully awake to realize it is already February.

As I can recall from looking at my January schedule, there were speaking engagements with little break for me. But it was fun to complete a marathon of 9 preaching engagements through 7 consecutive weekends, starting from November, ending in January. At the Upper North Anglican clergy meeting last month, a decision was made to establish a training/theological center in Penang. That was an exciting decision which I hope to be given more responsible and involvement. After all, that is my calling. Pastoral…eh, not really my cup of tea. I very much prefer working within a teaching institution, ie., the (Christian) education ministry.

The Bahasa Bible School will start its class in March. I’m in the midst of promoting it and getting the ground work ready. My coordinators in other centers don’t seem to be as enthusiastic. Perhaps it’s because they are pastors first, unlike myself. Penang will start its class in Prai at the start of March. The same for the Ipoh center. Gua Musang and Ulu Tiram have not given me any details yet. End of the month is the SEA Provincial Gathering and I’ll meet most of them. I intend to personally push them to expedite the work. We really need a good start in a professional and impressive manner. After all, first impressions count. I want it the very best, just for our Lord. He surely deserves that. Nothing less but the very best.

As we prepare to celebrate the lunar new year, I would like to take this opportunity to greet everyone a very blessed Chinese New Year, Kong Xi Fa Cai, and a (spiritually) fruitful year ahead.

Ministry Update: Reflecting 2010

2010-12-31T10:47:00.002+08:00

The days between Christmas and New Year are often lazy days. Many opt to take leave and go for a holiday. Others go to work without actually being present at work. The anticipation for a new year and the wrapping of the old is an annual affair we encounter yet we always fall into the trap to laze through the week.

Along the lazy days the Lord brought me to reflect upon the year that was and appreciate the many blessings, both seen and unseen. As I pen the final update for the year, allow me to share and thank each one of you for being my friend, my partner, and fellow traveler along this spiritual pilgrimage we share.

It was a year of adaptation for me, leaving an education based institution to begin the new phase of ministry. The Lord gave me a vision and a passion to pursue a ministry of vast potential and I still am overwhelmed by its potentials and prospects. But this only serves to remind me of how inadequate I am apart from God. Entering into the so-called full-time Christian vocation is a complete surrender to the will of God and the anthem is, it’s all about You, Jesus; not about me.

It is a tremendous joy to serve across denominations; meeting and partnering with fellow brothers and sisters from various denominations and church backgrounds. This is the uniqueness of my calling and my pledge of loyalty to the church of Jesus Christ, not to any specific denomination. Denominations, by the way, only serve to divide.

As I reflect upon the past year, I saw the ups and downs, the laughter and the tears, the joy and the sorrow. Yet in all these, I give thanks to a mighty God who works all things for the good of those whom He loves. Allow me to express my gratitude for your partnership and fellowship. Allow me to share with you and return you the blessings you extend to me. Allow me to thank the groups you represent for walking with me through the year, to individuals that have taught me, inspire me, and encourage me.

Living as redeemed sinners we can never achieve perfection at this end of heaven but your partnerships have enriched my spiritual journey in so many ways. To FGA BM, JCMC Youth/Young Adults, FLC that I am regularly in touch and work with – thank you. To individuals that colored my spiritual journey through 2010: from MBTS, PCC, Wesley Methodist Penang, Wesley Methodist Taiping, AOG Ipoh, CGMC, HMB Sabah, HMB Sarawak, FGA Penang, JCMC, FLC, EPCC, GBC, and countless others – thank you.

To my home cell in GBC: you are the only familiar refuge when I needed to return home. I have not been attending GBC Sunday services even at times when my Sunday mornings are available because GBC has grown very distant. Each time I visited, there seemed to be more unfamiliar faces drowning the familiarity I was expecting. It dawned on me that GBC is no longer “home.”

To my partners in the BM ministry, especially the FGA BM pastoral team: you guys are the best. I feel so inadequate each time I stand before you to “teach” knowing that I face an audience who have years of field experience that I ought to learn from. Thank you for accepting me as an “unofficial” team-mate and sharing the retreat, the training, the makan. I greatly appreciate and am honored to learn the ropes of practical ministry together with you guys, something that is not taught in the Seminary. It truly enable me to better formulate a curriculum that is relevant and appropriate for the Bible School ministry I am leading. You are a team that expresses joy in ministry and your partnership birth a deeper love for the BM work in this nation.

To my partners in JCMC: hey, you guys remind me of my previous youth pastorate. The struggle to balance between pleasing the conservative leadership and pursuing a passion for God is nothing new; a little nostalgic to me. Thank you for your friendship and fellowship, not forgetting the fun and makan.

To my almost forgotten family in FLC: though I do not visit often, the times that I do is like returning home to familiar surroundings. The small-knitted-ness among you is so unique and it easily makes one feel at home. Thank you for launching me into active ministry decades ago.

To friends and partners in ministry: in Penang, Taiping, Ipoh, JB, Klang Valley, Sabah, Sarawak, and friends who have migrated to Australia, UK, US; friends I met in Malaysia but from/serving in various countries around the globe – the honor of having known you colored this year brightly and I pray for the coming year that we continue to enrich each other spiritually as we journey together.

As I prepare my first message for 2011, I am reminded of the need to challenge ourselves to expect discipline from God – a discipline that will move us out from our comfort zones, to prevent complacency, and to be always be on our toes. To all my partners in ministry, I thank you and pray that we will continue our partnership into another challenging year tomorrow, anticipating God to work in us and through us to influence a nation that desperately needs to know and experience a loving God.

Ministry Update 2: December 2010

2010-12-11T10:18:00.000+08:00

Cameron Highlands: sitting on the border of two states in Peninsular Malaysia, Perak and Pahang; and home to numerous indigenous tribal people. Recently I was asked how many tribes were there among the indigenous community in Peninsular Malaysia. It was then that I realized I have “lost touch” with my research project; that I’ve left the initial research to sit in my hard disk and focus on the task at hand – interviewing respondents. So my friend, below is the chart categorizing the indigenous community:

Negrito:Kintaq,Lanok,Kensiu,Jahai,Mendriq,Bateq

Senoi:Temiar,Semai,Mah Meri,Che Wong,Ja Hut,Semoq Beri

Malayu Asli:Orang Selatar,Jakum,Orang Kuala,Orang Kanaq,Temuan,Semelai

Most of these people dwell in the interior; mainly in the central region of the Peninsular. Some of you may notice that this is my second update for this month. The earlier update was not sent to everyone in my usual mailing list. Anyway, it’s already December. We have arrived at the close of the year. I had a great and wonderful trip to Ipoh recently, visiting the OA community at both sides of the Camerons hill. I joined R & R’s church team to a Semai village near Tapah and later visited my Semai colleagues at Gopeng. I also had the opportunity to visit Kampar, the Methodist Senoi Workers’ Training Center and tasted the popular curry chicken bread. It was a fantastic trip and there’s much that I learnt and experienced.
First encounter was the team from an Ipoh church…a Cantonese church. But I discovered soon enough that despite the initial language barrier, hokkien is pretty widely known in Ipoh too. However, I was still pretty lost in a Cantonese worship service. It was a “relief” when I hop to a BM church following that. Is always good to be among something you are familiar with after being “lost in (language) transit.”

On the morning before I returned to Penang, I had breakfast in the hawkers’ center in Gopeng market. Yes, R & R…I just discovered this from the locals. There’s a special noodles stall and another porridge stall which are both very popular. But both were closed that morning. I think your church member was referring to these. Anyway, I sat at the table with a Semai family. The hawker came to serve the food, looked at me, and spoke in Cantonese. I looked at her blankly and asked my Semai friend what she just said (well, my Semai friend understands Cantonese). This hawker asked my Semai friend whether I’m Chinese. So, I replied to her I’m “Cina bukan Cina.”

It’s been a slow year for me, having to adapt to the new system and structure of the Anglican church. I doubt I can fully comprehend the “Anglican sentiments” on certain issues they hold so closely. After all, I pretty much grow up with a universal church mentality, free from the confines of (denomination) traditions.
Ministry wise…well, I have my home (church) CG to thank for helping me break record for 8 consecutive speaking engagements through 7 consecutive weekends, stretching from end of November till mid of January. I’m looking forward to some opportunity where I can break such a record. The BM Bible School had delayed its new curriculum launch. We’ll start in March 2011 instead of the initial January. Kindly join me in prayer for this ministry. We are experiencing some “hiccups” that I’m not comfortable to share in detail yet as it is pending decisions from some board members that can only meet in January. I’m looking forward to the new year with new challenges awaiting. Let’s march on in Jesus’ name to change our nation, our world with the truth of Jesus Christ. A very Merry Christmas to all of you and a very happy New Year too…

Ministry Update December 2010

2010-12-02T21:42:00.002+08:00

It seems like yesterday when we welcome 2010. We have arrived at the last month of the year and busy preparing to greet another new year. I suppose this is another season for new year resolutions that we never bother to keep. Christmas is just around the corner and the festivities are already in the air in shopping malls.

As I take a glance back at the year it was, I realized that it was a slow year for me. Transition times are slow I suppose, something a work-oriented person like me will regard as redundant times. But I am grateful to the Lord that those times enabled me to think, to plan, to organize. I am still amazed and overwhelmed by the vast potentials of the BM ministry in this country. I am grateful to the Lord for the networks and opportunities prevailing to explore and develop the work. It feels like staring at a 2000 jigsaw puzzle pieces in front of me without knowing how and where each piece belongs and how they can come together. But I am trusting the Lord and His perfect timing for the big picture to come into place.

The BM School ministry hit a “crisis” and we are at a pause right now. There are 2 possible outcomes. First, we break away from SAM network and it will mean no foreign funding and more work for me in raising funds. But this is something I am prepared for. Second option is a more popular possibility, which is to go independent and work in partnership with various seminaries and Bible Schools. I am not familiar with the history and background of this School but discovered that it was originally planned to be the Peninsular Malaysia arm for CTC, a foreign training ministry which has a base in Kuching. Apparently, CTC has affiliate itself with an American university. If SAM re-connect to its roots and original purpose, I suppose the (Peninsular Malaysia) School will also be endorsed by the university. The second option will be a better option for the growth of the School. However, it sort of contradicts my “contract” with the Anglican diocese. I’m not worried; only anxious at how God will direct this ministry. And I’m trusting Him to lead us to the best option where He will best effectively affect the potentials of this work.

I am in the field research part of my graduate studies. I’m having a lot of fun meeting and interviewing my respondents. But I’m about to conclude meeting the Christian population. Next, I’ll need to meet non-Christian respondents and I’m not sure how it will go. I’m trusting it to be just as interesting.

As expected, December is a busy month. The last weekend of November marked the first of my 7 consecutive weeks of preaching engagements at different locations…all the way till the second week in January. Christmas dinners and events are coming one after another. And just let me greet all of you a very merry and blessed Christmas, a happy and prosperous New Year. Once again,

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you

Ministry Update 2: November 2010

2010-11-15T20:03:00.000+08:00

Mid November…and MBTS graduation just over. I had the chance to meet some (ex)students who graduated with their diploma and bachelor degrees. There are no words to adequately describe completion of a long journey of effort sealed with a few mere words on a piece of paper. But there was the joy of accomplishment, a joy of completion. I am still working on my study program, at the research stage after my research proposal had been approved. I am the only Malaysian and the only lady in the PhD program in MBTS and I strive to create another historical entry to be the first PhD graduate from MBTS. The first history was in 2007 when I became the first ThM (Missiology) graduate. But as I observed the graduates and the “aftermath” of the graduation ceremony, the Lord pricked my thoughts to think of something much deeper.

My motivation to achieve a PhD is simply to take the people I lead to higher level. After all, a leader can only lead his/her followers to where he/she had been. Having the highest academic qualification will mean I can take my people higher and further in their academic pursuance. I believe I need to remove the glass ceiling over our indigenous brothers and sisters and empower them to grow as much as God has ordained for them. But recently I realized I had wrongly “adopted” an unhealthy culture of selfishly wanting to create that historical entry, probably for my own pride and satisfaction. It was wrong and I need to re-focus and re-evaluate. The goal of Christian education is transformation of lives, not to churn out degree holders that only take pride in the papers they hold in their hands. We have been too influenced by the world in this manner.

I recall an advice, a warning rather, by my denomination leader to be cautious in running the BM Bible School. That the goal should always be transformation of lives; not a degree mill that churn out degree holders that are no different before and after their education.

It is a good sign when we see an increasing number of graduates each year; whether it is from the religious “industry” or the secular sector. But I really do wonder, (especially for Christian education because this is my main concern) whether as Christian educators we will maintain the standard and quality of education deliverance to the students. Whether the student had adequately learned or merely the teacher had taught. Whether as educators we have adequately contextualize teaching curriculum in such a manner that our students can adequately apply its principles effectively and not merely to copy what was taught in the classroom into their ministry field.

There are some changes to my November schedule. Will be joining a team to Ulu Groh on Tuesday, 16Nov night and returning Wednesday night after a day-long seminar. The next trip to the OA settlements will be with a team from an Ipoh church in early December. I’m still working on the preparations needed as SAM progress in her partnership with STM. There are so many dynamics involved, not to mention complicated “human factors.” In the meantime, Christmas is slowly approaching. It was just last year when I missed being in a pastoral capacity during the busy celebrative season. But suddenly, I am back in this very capacity. I do not know if I will experience any “nostalgic encounters” but I certainly look forward to spending Christmas season with old friends from a church that launched me into active ministry.

Ministry Update November 2010

2010-11-05T09:47:00.000+08:00

Since when did “farmasi” become “apotik” in Penang? I was in Medan recently and saw a lot of “apotik” shops and I did not know what “apotik” was. My local hosts explained to me that it is pharmacy. I took my mom for a check-up in LWE. There were 2 pharmacies nearby. What do you know? Below the word pharmacy or the malay version “farmasi” was huge letters A-P-O-T-I-K. Goodness…I thought. Invasion of Indonesia into Malaysian vocabularies. We may be similar but still different. Although I have been to North Sumatra (Medan & Banda Aceh) several times, each visit taught me many new things. This trip, I learnt to sleep with lights on and I don’t mean the regular dim sleeping lights. It’s bright fluorescent lamp! I also learnt to eat rice with instant noodles as its dish together with fried bee-hoon! Goodness me, as I discovered that the local Indonesians must have rice for every meal, regardless of whether it was a super early breakfast or a super late supper. Somehow the rice just appear!

Last month was also the SAM Penang’s first graduation service. It went well despite the small turn-up. True to its principle to be near the students, SAM will set up 2 new centers in Gua Musang, Kelantan to service the east coast and Ulu Tiram/Sri Alam in Johore to service the southern region. Ipoh will remain the strongest center, enjoying a ready supply of prospective students from the OA communities nearby. Penang, on the other hand, will remain the most unstable. The population of BM churches here consists of either East Malaysian students or Indonesian contract workers with a maximum stay of 5 years in Penang. Thus, it is crucial to network with other Bible Schools in East Malaysia/Medan for continuity for the students. This is in progress. Please join me to pray for a strong network.

I was in STM recently for a meeting regarding the partnership of SAM-STM. It went well. It was a culture shock of sorts for me actually, having been accustomed to MBTS’ way that provides a lot flexibility. Suddenly, I discovered I need to spell out everything as detail as possible. Well, a lot of work for me as we embark on this partnership, but I am very looking forward to the challenges ahead. It’s going to be a learning process and the resubmission of the new SAM-ITC BM prospectus will be like another round of me submitting my research proposal…hahaha.

Middle of the month is a trip to the OA village as I join a few BM pastors to a conference for women and family. Following that, at the end of the month is a BM Bible translation workshop in Klang Valley stretching till early Dec. There are exciting times ahead. In ministry and for our nation. Do join me in prayer as we press on to see God exalted here in Malaysia.

Ministry Update October 2010

2010-10-06T10:47:00.001+08:00

With the arrival of October, we have entered into the last quarter of the year. It will not be long before we begin preparations for Christmas and new year to greet the approaching 2011. I have an exciting schedule for next year that takes me to the field all over the country, a task I eagerly look forward to.

This Friday is the SAM (Sekolah Alkitab Malaysia) Penang center’s first graduation service. I’m not familiar with the history of this school but was recently recruited to coordinate the Penang center and provide academic guidance for the whole school that has centers in Ipoh and Johor. Another center in Johor is in our plans. Besides that, we are exploring prospects in Sabah and in Sarawak. It is exciting to see how this ministry develops. More so, to see how God is moving in this land through the BM ministry.

Next week, I’m joining a team of BM pastors to Medan. I hope to be able to establish some form of network with a bible school there in the sharing of resources.

I’ve started the interviewing process with my respondents as part of my field research for my dissertation. It was an interesting affair and I look forward to meeting more respondents.

Kindly keep praying for us. Especially the BM school ministry. Right now, through ITC we can offer certificate and diploma programs but I’m waiting for endorsement from STM to allow us to offer BTh program. I take a step back and see how huge prospects are for this ministry. I often feel overwhelmed at the extent of what needs to be done and what can be done for the BM churches in this country. I’m just not sure how each piece fall into which place. I just know this is huge and I need heaps of prayer support to fulfill this calling. But I know I can keep dreaming big because I serve a big God.

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

Ministry Update Sept 2010

2010-09-01T19:49:00.000+08:00

August comes to an end swiftly enough. The thrill in this month was my dissertation research proposal that was approved and that paved the way for me to proceed to the next phase of my graduate study program – the actual field research. I’ve been looking forward to the field research – the task of meeting people and asking to learn the actual culture and lifestyle being practiced. Following that, the next phase will be the tedious write-up followed by the defense, which is the “final exam.” My topic is “Raising Indigenous Leaders Through Christian Education: A Semai Model.” Upon successful submission, I intend to translate the entire manuscript into Bahasa Malaysia.

August was also a month my former students were here from mainly East Malaysia. It was great having to meet up with them again. And it was good that we had our annual barbeque of monkey meat!

August also saw me attending the annual Anglican Synod for the first time. It gave me a better understanding of its governing structure and also an opportunity to meet fellow workers from other parts of Malaysia. Johor has come into the radar of our BM Bible School, which means more work has to be invested with our co-workers there so we can synchronize our schedule for next year. But I am glad and happy for the progress.

September is another slow month with not much activity except preparing to launch the new curriculum for the School. We will launch it in January, as the new academic year. Right now I’m working on getting confirmation from prospective teachers for the dates and courses to teach in both the Penang and Ipoh centers. A possible date towards the end of the month is targeted for a trip to the jungles. Then early next month is SAM Penang’s first graduation service.

Thank you all for your prayers and partnership in this challenging ministry.

SB

Ministry Update August 2010

2010-08-03T10:20:00.001+08:00

2Aug10

I came back yesterday from a shot trip to the OA villages. It was amazing. The last time I visited this village was three years ago and they had just one out-of-tune guitar. Today they have a full band – an electric keyboard, three electric guitars/bass guitar, a drum set, complete with a simple PA system! And the flush system in the toilet works! At least in one of the two toilets in the church…It has never failed to amaze me how God works among the simple folks. As usual worship was spectacular and I was once again reminded by God that He prepares the best for me. That is why He wants me to serve in this capacity.

There were 2 groups of approximately ten of us. One team went to the OA villages in Simpang Pulai while the other went to Gopeng region. I was with the team to Ulu Groh in Gopeng. We wanted to see the famous Rajah Brooke butterflies sanctuary. It was either the timing was bad or we were pretty much cheated because we went to the sanctuary and saw just about ten butterflies! And we paid RM15 each for that! I thought I saw bigger ones in Ulu Kampar last year…for free.

The rest of August is pretty relaxing. My former students are here in Penang attending a month long classes n MBTS. I am very looking forward to meeting with them again. And of course, looking forward also to our tradition of barbeque monkey towards the end of their stay here.

I’ve submitted the fourth revision to my research proposal. Still no news from my supervisor. It’s almost a week now and I’m keeping my fingers crossed. This chap is very meticulous, unlike my supervisor for my ThM program where my proposal was approved after just one revision. But I suppose this will ensure higher standard and after all, it is a PhD we are talking about. Until now, I’m still amazed at how the Lord took me thus far academically. From one who often failed or near failing grades in my primary school, then someone who never thought she could pass her SPM, but was eventually sent to UM; who thought a basic bachelor degree is more than enough as long as studies are concerned. My gosh…I’ve gone to earn three masters and the good Lord has given me far more than I dare to dream of the wildest dream. These truly remind me of how undeserving I am of God’s unending goodness and blessings.

Please join me to continue praying for the Bahasa Bible School. At a PADERI conference recently, I had the opportunity to meet and network with various church leaders of various denominations. Prospects are encouraging for this effort. But my partner in the Ipoh center is encountering some hiccups with hierarchy matters that is slowing him. In a way I think the hierarchical structure is pretty much not ready to move as fast as I anticipated. Even with some leaders who are eager to move forward. If only the “old school” is willing to learn/accept new approaches. But this is not an issue with just us, it is found practically everywhere else. Let me end this time with 2 “old favorites” in the Bahasa churches:

ADA SATU SOBATKU
Ada satu sobatku yang setia
Tak pernah Dia tinggalkan diriku
Diwaktu aku susah, waktuku sendirian
Dia selalu menemani diriku

Nama-Nya Yesus, nama-Nya Yesus
Nama Yesus yang menghibur hatiku (2x)

BETAPA HATIKU
Betapa hatiku Tuhan, berterima kasih Yesus
Kau mengasihi ku, Tuhan. Kau memiliki ku.

Hanya ini Tuhan, persembahan ku
Segenap hidupku, jiwa dan raga ku
S’bab tak ku miliki, harta kekayaan
Yang cukup bererti ‘tuk ku persembahkan

Hanya ini Tuhan, permohonan ku
Terimalah Tuhan persembahan ku
Pakailah hidupku, sebagai alatmu
Seumur hidupku.

Reflecting Missions

2010-07-05T20:02:00.000+08:00

MISSIONS, I suppose we generally see it as overseas and foreign. Few will actually be even aware of home missions. To some extent, perhaps it is viewed with a little fear because it brings us to confront unknown changes. Through my years in the full time Christian vocation, I have come to view this discipline with much interest.

I suppose it was in the mid 90s in GBC, when Rev TT Quah and his wife came to sow the seeds of missions in this old Baptist church. I must admit that I was just as curious as everyone else wanting to know and get acquainted to the new cultures and experiences as related to us by Ps Quah. My first participation in a mission trip was to Myanmar in November of 1998. Probably that was when the little missions seed took root. But my focus had always been to study the Word in depth. I proceeded to complete my program in Christian Studies in 2000, then started serving in a local church while continue to study till I earn my degree in Divinity. I wanted to continue pursuing the discipline of education. I strongly feel that the contemporary church lack solid foundation of the truth contained in the Word. In fact, I left pastoring the local church to pursue a graduate program in Christian education. Somewhere along the way, I discovered that this is not a discipline I should pursue. It was at the second module of this program that I was forced to confront a difficult truth. Most of us are taught to complete what we’ve started and I am one of these. I have started this program, so, how can I leave without completing it? As I recalled that long journey in NICE bus from Penang to KL for a week long AGST classes in MBS, Klang in May 2005 I was not at peace at all. I remember trying to find comfort in the song “STILL” which played itself countless times in my head till I reached KL. Eventually, I dropped pursuing the education discipline when I found excitement and joy to pursue missiology. About two years later, I completed my graduate program in missiology. And even now, pursuing it further.

Why has missions captivated me these years? It is something I am still discovering. But one thing I do know is that this is one ministry I am destined to pursue. Each time there is a call for missions, there is always a deep conviction and a sense of awesomeness. It brings untold joy to see fellow Christians responding to the call into this particular ministry. It is a feeling of divine joy that Christians are fulfilling the very core of our faith. It is one authentification of the Christian confession. And I was once again brought into such a place yesterday. Never had I witnessed such eager, such crowd, such conviction as the crowd I witnessed yesterday, responding to the call into missions. I thanked God I had the privilege of such witnessing yesterday. It was in a crowded church full of migrant workers, each offering their worship in simplicity, in complete surrender.

It was an experience I pretty much need for now. With one foot planted in a traditional church while the other foot on board a contemporary church. But the confirmation and assurance I very much needed was this: to know that from whichever platform or organization I’m serving from, the goal/objection is still to bring awareness of missions as the very core of every area of ministry God has entrusted to me.

Ministry Update July 2010

2010-07-02T10:54:00.000+08:00

With half the year gone, I found myself doing little thus far. I have to move at the pace of my co-workers for one, and need to consult other partners in the ministry. This has resulted in a slow moving pace for the Bahasa Bible School. Yes, I’m a bit frustrated. Not only with the hierarchical structure but the laid-back culture I’m encountering. I’m not born to relax.

A few things come to mind as I look at the June that was. I’m still impacted by the NECF Seminar where Philip Mantofa made the comment that “being a pastor is not about having a position; it is about having the anointing.” I suppose it struck a deep chord of comfort and assurance within me, especially when I observe “ministers” who seem to care more about securing a fanciful title and position, rather than actually doing the work of ministry. It’s all about the anointing and how true this is. Within my short years of serving in ministry, I’ve come across too many Christian ministers possessing a conduct that is so very “unchristian” to the shame of ministry. I think if God is ever going to visit our nation, He will first have to deal with these “rejects.”

July is pretty relaxing for me, with just one speaking engagement and two out-station trips; one to the PADERI conference in Cameron Highlands in the middle of the month (15-18July), another at the end of the month (31Jul-1Aug) with a weekend trip to the OA villages. August will also see two out-station trips to the Klang Valley at the start and end of the month. September also has 2 out-station trips. With a relaxing July will also mean a good opportunity to kick myself into concentrating on revising my research proposal. It is a minor revision this time and I hope to get it right nicely so I can proceed to the actual field research, something I very look forward to.

Been feeling lazy these days. I think it has a lot to do with the gloomy weather. I mean, the cooling rain is so welcoming after a super hot season. But the unpredictable weather also causes me to laze indoor rather than to be outdoor. These days, I find myself buying all the needed food for the day on my way to the office and stay put in the office till time to go home. And with 6 comfortable beds within easy reach, I often opted for a 30 minutes siesta during lunch hour!

Ministry Update June 2010

2010-06-04T10:46:00.000+08:00

We are quickly approaching half the year. For me June began with a crazy trip down south. I took a bus to Ipoh and joined the rest of the team in an eleven-seater MPV travelling to JB, arriving at midnight. Half the following day was free, supposedly for us to rest and relax. But that half passed by swiftly. Later in the afternoon was the SAM Council Meeting followed by SAM Johor’s first graduation service and by 9.30pm we were in a van traveling back to Ipoh. We arrived at 4.30am. Rather, I arrived with a friend in his Gopeng home at 4.30am. Though it was a brief trip with a quick stop-ever in Gopeng, I managed to grab the famous honey roast chicken and ta-pao back for my mom.

I am looking forward to another crazy trip down south middle of the month. I am sure this one will be more exciting. Departing Penang at midnight for KL to attend a half day seminar and travel back after lunch. How much more exciting can it be? Just hope we don’t fall asleep during the seminar instead.

Besides a few speaking engagements, I will be focusing on developing the BM Bible School this month. We encountered a little hiccup as to where we should pursue our accreditation affiliation. Do join us in prayer for clarity of direction and unity in purpose and spirit for all of us in the council. I just submitted my second revised research proposal. Please join me to pray for a favorable reply. Can’t wait to go to the field for the actual research proper. Next trip to the jungles is end of July, unless something crops up before that. Anyone wanting to pass anything to any OA village, let me know before then. Please pray for me as I will be participating in a mission trip to Sabah in mid September. This is an interesting trip because I will be the only non-local in the team, we will be traveling almost round Sabah, and it is the first mission trip for the local church. You see, the OA churches in Sabah do not venture beyond what is familiar to them. But this church, Gereja Baptis Keningau is initiating the first mission venture for the local OA church. The pastor that captured the vision for mission was my student and yes, I’m very “proud” of this trip. GBK comes under KK Baptist Church but they are taking the responsibility to raise their own funds for this trip. Thus far, there’s almost 20 participants and we will travel through several towns, including Pitas, Lahad Datu, Tawau (Serudung Baru and Kalabakan). Pitas is the stronghold of the Tembunuo people, known to be fierce warriors. During WW II, the Japanese soldiers could not enter Pitas because it was strongly guarded by their warriors who would slaughter the Japs mercilessly, leaving one to return to camp to inform the rest of what happened. Kalabakan, the final stop is where we plan to feast ourselves on the famous Kalabakan huge prawns/mini lobsters. All these stops, the team will do children ministry (VBS), women ministry, youth ministry, etc and end with a revival concert. If God so move your hearts to support this trip, please pray for us and the fund raising effort that needs RM9000. Participants are not paying and all expenses are for the team’s travel (5 vehicles, inc vans and jeeps), food, etc. I will send a separate email to some of you with details. Hope you’ll respond ;)
Finally, thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update May 2010

2010-05-07T13:28:00.001+08:00

Time literally flies. What do you know? It’s already May, the fifth month of 2010. And entering into the fifth month of the year, I went for a short visit to the OA village, together with ST, before proceeding to Ipoh to attend the first class of a former student who was teaching for the first time. It was a fruitful trip for me. I finally managed to get the necessary details to complete my prospectus for the BM school. Please join me in prayer that this school will take shape in accordance to God’s will. The school is now called SAM-ITC BM (Sekolah Alkitab Malaysia – Ipoh Theological Center BM Track) ITC is STM’s (Seminari Teologi Malaysia) TEE branch campus in Ipoh. We are working on offering Certificate in Christian Ministry, Diploma in Christian Ministry, and probably also a BTh (Bachelor in Theology). Coming soon will be master courses (Master in Christian Studies and Master in Ministry). Our concern (which should not be, actually) is the finances involved because STM requires specific course fees to be paid directly to them.

I am very excited at the development and prospects of the school. In fact, I’m targeting it to go full swing by next year. I invite you to pray alongside with me in this exciting venture. I am also praying for further developments in partnership with Christian organizations/churches in both Sabah and Sarawak. There’s really vast potential in this ministry and the BM churches are rapidly growing. I know almost everywhere, there are demands for BM pastors, and quality training for BM pastors/leaders.

The rest of May is slow moving. It is interesting for me to note that I always need three to four weeks to prepare a sermon. I always wonder how church pastors can churn out sermons week after week. In fact, I was pretty fearful taking up the role as the pastor of BJAC and having preaching duties at almost every Saturday. But the surprising development I observed was that God just enabled me to write/prepare messages in much shorter period. It is amazing, truly amazing…how God equip us as long as we avail ourselves.

Just this short update this time. Do join me in prayer for the BM Bible School, and yes, I’m joining everyone else to pray for our nation/Malaysian church. Also, remember to pray for my second revision of dissertation proposal. It’s moving pretty slowly. And thank you all for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update April 2010

2010-04-01T14:55:00.000+08:00

It’s been a month as I slowly settle down in my new office, picking up the pieces and finding my way around. Last month was eventful with travels and adventures. This month, it’ll be a bit more “localized.” Good Friday/Easter weekend is just round the corner with services to attend. Besides the night classes in Prai on Monday nights and Thursday nights, and speaking engagements on almost all Saturdays, I have the weekdays to attend to all the necessary preparations besides putting things in place in my office. I’m a bit slow in getting the necessary office equipment, wanting to explore options for a good bargain.

The Bible School in Ipoh is taking shape slowly and sturdily. I’m glad of the progress. I am excited at how things are taking shape. I’m really looking forward to seeing how the Lord is shaping the School. We have both teaching approaches of night classes and intensive classes taught by local and out-station teachers. We also have in our teaching team a few Orang Asli pastors. The first class of the year kicked off last month in Gopeng with ten registered students. I was teaching the class and stayed in the rural church. Little did I know that the church was infested with rats almost the size of a cat! The other option I have was to stay with the local OA pastor in the kampong. But I was not prepared for a kampong stay. There’s no electricity at night and water supply was inconsistent. And I needed to prepare the next day’s sessions, thus, I opted to stay in the rural church, a double story shop lot located within a row of shops in the old Gopeng town. The first night I could hardly sleep as there were strange noises almost everywhere. They were probably noises made by the rats. Well, I just believed them to be rats. The second night was pretty similar. I knew I had to catch some good night’s sleep to function well teaching the class the next day, so the smart me took a dose of piriton and I slept through the night soundly, disregarding the funny noises around. I was “rescued” from the church the following two nights where I stayed with some good friends in Ipoh. Good thing I brought my GPS. Helped me navigate my way around. But even with that, I took several wrong turns…

Do pray along side me for the Bible School. This is an exciting ministry. We are planning to offer certificate, diploma, and bachelor programs in two tracks: Christian Studies and Theology. Our team of teachers is mainly local teachers, including the OA pastors. We are planning two venues: night classes at YMCA Ipoh and intensive one week classes at a local church which has a complete education block. A fund from a foreign mission organization is available to enable us to run this ministry. God truly supply all our needs. Now we are waiting for better/more participation from other local churches around the nation once we publicize the school and its branches/extension centers. From the pastoral angle, I’m still surviving. Praise God for that.

PS: to some of my friends who are a bit confused – I AM still staying in Green Lane. It is my office that is in town. I moved into the office which is a room in a single story bungalow that will serve as a mission house for visiting pastors/missionaries

Ministry Update March 2010

2010-03-06T21:14:00.000+08:00

I am now writing this update as an Anglican pastor. Hahaha…humorous, isn’t it? And our God is indeed a humorous God. Never did I ever imagine myself to be associated with a traditional, conservative religious organization. But God has His plans, in His way, in His time. I have moved in to the parsonage which was newly renovated a few months ago in anticipation of a resident pastor. Now, as I settle down I need to fill the basic furnishings with things that will make the place more conducive. Not sure how I’m going to do that. After all, I’ve always enjoy the mission field and used to the very basic of living conditions which make this place pretty much a “luxury.” It’s a single story bungalow with three rooms. One room has been converted to the office while the other two is available to house guests/visitors. Each has 3 beds and both have air-con and fan. However, there’s just one bathroom available which may cause a little hassle for big groups visiting. Utensils are available at the very basic/minimal for the moment. Do drop by for a visit. It’s pretty lonely here.

My primary ministry is still the OA community in Perak and I’ll be traveling frequently there. I’m still exploring how to comfortably leave my mom home alone during my travels away from Penang. Kindly advice if you have any suggestions. I’m considering getting a maid. The training ministry in Perak is progressing slowly. Initially, it was planned that PLK will run in parallel with SAM but there’s a proposal to merge these two to form a more holistic feeder school for ITC. Please pray as this school slowly takes shape. There’re available facilities ready in a local church in Ipoh, in anticipation of the establishment of a school. Looks like the Lord has been preparing the way for the ministries within my portfolio. We will pioneer the BM track for ITC and will need about two years before we can be directly linked to a local Seminary. Please pray for us.

March is pretty busy with the task of settling down in this new office. I have a speaking engagement at a youth group in a Methodist church on the first Sunday. The second week I’ll be joining the team of BM pastors from another church for a worship retreat at BHOP in Penang Hill, followed by a trip to Simpang Pulai for a weekend retreat with lay leaders with some BM pastors. That leaves week three pretty free to attempt a lot of desk work for the class in Intro to Christian Missions in Gopeng on week four. Following this will be preparations for Good Friday/Easter weekend and welcoming month four of the year.

Join me in prayer as we anticipate greater things that the Lord has for our nation. Thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update February 2010

2010-02-08T16:36:00.000+08:00

February arrived swiftly enough but I have no complaints. I’m too eager to get started on active ministry. And February kick-started it with a meeting with OA church leaders in Gopeng. It was a fruitful meeting but still requires follow-up with other denominational reps. I have been to Gopeng several times and traveling there is no problem as I am familiar with the route. But I have planned visits to friends in Ipoh and Taiping. For the first time, I was driving alone along unfamiliar roads with nothing but a GPS to take me to my destinations. I do admit that I was both anxious and nervous. Just how much can I trust the GPS anyway? Besides, what if I suddenly lost satellite signal? But it was an experience epitomizing my spiritual journey right now.

I do not consider myself a spiritual giant. Instead, I lack so much faith to attempt what the Lord impressed upon my heart. So, this step of faith that I’ve taken to walk on uncharted waters, into a ministry of vast potential and huge challenges, I’m not hiding the fact that I’m entering it with much fear and trembling. And I have nothing except the voice of God to take me to its destinations. I have nothing except the prompting of God’s Holy Spirit to direct me at each step.
Sometimes I still wonder if I’ve made the right decision. After all, uncertainties are still lurking in the corners. I wanted so much to take the offer to serve as missions pastor with a vibrant church. I mean, I’ve been with the traditional church for so long. But ministry is not about what I want, it’s about what He wants. And considering the ministry, I took the option to serve from the platform of a traditional church. In fact, the three main traditional denominations form the largest group of the OA community I’m serving. It’s only logical to start a training ministry along the established groups.

February is a month of festivities. I mean, hey, CNY mood is in the air. My mom had put up CNY deco everywhere in the house. The shopping malls and streets are exhaling festivities into the atmosphere. People are slowing down as they gear towards CNY. Later this week will see a lot of travels and for a whole next week, CNY theme will dominate almost every aspect of our lifestyle.

For me, I only have a full calendar for the first and last week of February. The two weeks in between is CNY. I submitted my revised research proposal last week. It will take some time before my supervisor return it for further revision. In the meantime, I can indulge in Facebook (again). Pray for me as I juggle with several hats: the training ministry among the OA, pastoral ministry in BJAC, PhD student. But these are roles I very much look forward to with much excitement and anticipation. For most of you who know me well enough, my strength is in teaching and not pastoral. So, it’s going to be quite a challenge to pull off the pastoral aspect of my portfolio. Do remember me in prayer and thank you for your partnership in ministry. A very Kong Xi Fa Cai to all of you and God’s richest blessings for a prosperous new year.

PS:

Robert & Ruth: thanks for a wonderful time in Ipoh. More so for your fellowship, friendship, and partnership in ministry. I do believe the Lord is preparing you both for a greater purpose

Lynette: thanks for being a wonderful friend all these years; especially those times in 2nd RC, UM “harassing” me to attend church. At a time when I was prompted to stray, the Lord brought you to make sure I stay true to Him so that He can make me who I am for such a time as now to fulfill His purpose

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

Ministry Update January 2010

2010-01-18T14:27:00.000+08:00

Ah, I finally got down to pen a few updates…It’s been a relaxing, smooth ride into the new year, at least for me. Christmas was a blast. I had a wonderful time spending Christmas morning in an English service of a Lutheran church, the church that launched me into active ministry and hence, the start of yet another nostalgic moment for me. On Christmas afternoon, I was with a Bahasa church in Bukit Mertajam, being ushered in into a community of closely knitted fellowship of tribal hospitality. Christmas brought a love so deep and divine that I was a bit reluctant to go to PJ to spend New Year with my family there. Yet I know I have to. If not, taking up my new ministry commitments, I will have to be in church for all Christmas/New Year to come. And it was a wonderful time with my nephews. They grow so fast…

I came back to Penang on the 7th Jan. My nephew asked me why I need to go home so soon and I have to simplify a reply that there are people in Penang paying to hear me talk (I have a preaching engagement). Anyway, it has been a wonderful, fantastic, and fulfilling week as the Lord enabled me to minister across denominations. On 10jan I was ministering in the Lutheran Church, on 13jan I was with the FGA BM pastors, on 16jan I was with the youth in a Methodist church, and on 17jan I was sharing about the OA work with the Brethrens. Amazing isn’t it? That’s beside the in between fellowship with fellow believers from the Baptist, Anglican, etc…I think this is what I really enjoy most, ministering to the universal church of God, where the wall of denomination does not exist.

I am also glad that the last couple of days/weeks, I had the opportunity to meet long lost friends in Facebook. Schoolmates, classmates, collegians, course mates…and catching up on old times like what old people usually do. Ah…the joy of walking down memory lane, recalling those sweet, innocent moments. Unfortunately, I seem to have some corrupted memory files in my head disk drive and that made me missed out on some old adventures.

I realized I’m a bit addicted to Facebook and I forced myself to quit all games (except Mafia Wars). I’ve been sitting on my research proposal for about three months and I need to discipline myself back to my studies. And yes, quitting those games does help a bit. I’m revising a large portion to date. Stuck on a section which needs a little input from my supervisor, so, waiting for his reply will give me an excuse to indulge in Facebook for awhile.

Ministry is progressing well, slowly. A meeting is planned for various church leaders this 1st Feb. Please pray for us. We will meet to discuss how to plan/develop the training/teaching ministry to lay leaders in the interior, and also the possibility of community development and church partnership for various projects. We hope to share resources and save time/effort while being able to bless all concern. In the meantime, I’m being anglicanized, so that I serve from the platform of the Anglican church, ministering to the OA community. Please pray also for the advance training we are planning to establish in Ipoh town. We will work with a local seminary to offer degree/advance degree programs.

CNY is right around the corner, so, allow me to be the first few to greet you with a very happy and blessed Chinese New Year. Kong Xi Fa Cai…

Entering the New Year: Ministry Update

2009-12-26T14:12:00.000+08:00

I thought I just wrote a similar update a little while ago and suddenly, we’re entering into another new year. Time is not just flying, it seems to be speeding by like a jet plane or something. Well, I have left MBTS after 5 years of ministry there learning the most important lesson that regardless of the secular or sacred vocation, people are still fallen human beings prone to every evil known to men.

Being a workaholic, it sure was depressing for me to be relaxed and I’ve been very relaxed since May this year. Hey, I’ve been doing what I was doing for 5 years, what else is there unless I can proceed further with new, improved approaches and methodologies. And because I was not given that privilege, I felt so redundant to the point of depression. We cannot afford to fall into a maintenance mode in ministry. Unfortunately, in many instances, the church/Christian organization is merely maintaining itself without growth.

So I ask myself why I need a break? I should just jump back into active ministry. But I was in a way forced to take it slow. After all, I need to work at the phase of my co-workers. This new year, I have taken the delicate step onto uncharted waters. I have taken a leap of faith into a ministry of huge and vast potentials. I fearfully enter into a challenging task. Ok, so I’m skillful to play around with words. But it is an exciting step for me as the Lord takes me to another phase. I am never a person who can do the same thing over and over again one more time. Thus, I’m always seeking fresh challenges and adventures. And this seems to be it. And I pray and seek your prayer support to build the teaching ministry among the Orang Asli in Peninsular. It is going to be real tough, I am anticipating it. Yet, believe me, the next BIG thing to hit the church will be a revival from the indigenous touching our neighbors to impact this nation. I pray we will be together to witness this huge phenomena.

You know? I’ve always held some kind of prejudice against the Chinese-ed. It started from my campus days when those of us who cannot speak mandarin were treated like an outcast in our own Chinese community. Ok, so this is where racial polarization is birthed – in varsity campuses! In fact, I can very well remember the person who insisted that knowing the mandarin language is the very essence of being Chinese. (Yes Lynette, it’s that old horse, who else? Glad I’m not in Perak) So I have this assumption that the Chinese ed people are just too narrow-minded, square, and A++ in super boredom. And it doesn’t help that a huge population of MBTS are Chinese ed or from China itself. Though my years in CC does help a bit, I mean, hey ST and HA fun people, bah?! But guess what? I met a youth group from a Chinese church and they have got to be in the top three of the craziest people I’ve ever met!!! What an experience. ..And more than that is what I have learned. Christians are people, some with false declarations and some genuine conversions but they are found in every and any church regardless of denomination or background. But hey, isn’t it about time we break down the denomination wall in church? Huh? Where’s the amen fellas???!!!

I’ve got to discipline myself back to my studies. It is fun to assign work to students but having to attend to the assignments as a student is another story. I have to start revising my research proposal for a second submission. But it looks like it has to start in January after the holiday break. There’s just something about the holiday mood. It seems to spread in the air, and catch unexpecting victims to laze through the days in slow motion mode.

It was a busy Christmas day for me. Really… I was with a Lutheran church morning service but had to skip the fellowship lunch to drive to Bukit Mertajam to speak in a Bahasa church for their Christmas service. I was given the estimate of an hour’s drive of distance. I supposed the pastor was anticipating bad traffic. However, traffic was unusually smooth. Even at traffic lights, it was green all the way & I reached the destination in half the estimated time! It was a wonderful service filled with performances of joy and Christmas cheer. I was a bit disappointed though, at the buffet spread. I was expecting some kampong treats but discovered a city menu! Aise…a bahasa church and you find salad with mayo on the table…adui…

But it was a fun Christmas for me especially with the opportunity to meet again my former pastor & family. Geez…it has been about 15 years. And once again like last year, I was swept into an unexpected nostalgia. There’s just something about coming together as a church family that touched deep into the core of my being. I was at a youth camp and was reminded that my major is missiology and my minor is still youth. Once again, realizing I need to constantly take a step back to see the larger picture of ministry and not to be too narrowly focused.

To all my ministry partners that stretch across various denominations, I thank you for walking with me along this journey of faith. I thank you that we are together to work towards the fulfillment of God’s purpose here in Malaysia. I thank you that we are here with the passion to make a difference for our nation in this generation.

PHP 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you.

PS: Oh ya, I’d also like to thank those who are very concern for my health. Let me explain that I have a goiter and it is harmless. It is only the swelling of the thyroid glands but it is still doing what it is suppose to do. I have consulted two specialists and was advised not to remove it because it is not causing any harm. But thank you for your concern.

Ministry Update December 2009

2009-12-07T09:48:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is my last day serving in MBTS. There had been times of laughter and times of tears. Generally, it has been a time of learning. The most important lesson learnt is that there is no difference serving in a secular capacity and the so-called sacred vocation. We are all still fallen human beings, regardless of whether we are Christians, Christian leaders, or unbelievers. So, I’ve learnt to just let it go when people wronged me because ultimately, each of us stands accountable before God Himself.

The next two months will be the time of transition. And I seek your prayer support to settle down in the new ministry. It is an exciting venture. One of huge potential and enormous prospects, to the extent that I am fearful considering how a little person like me is able to manage this huge job. Of course I also feel so very privileged because I know the Lord would not have called me into this capacity if He doesn’t think I’m capable of it. Please pray along with me along the exciting ministry of big challenges.

There will be a two-tier approach in this teaching/training ministry among the indigenous church. Basic training sends us into the interior while advance training brings them to town where it is more accessible to various resources. The basic tier is a channel almost anyone can contribute. There will be training of very practical needs – Christian and practical living skills. Even teaching children simple A, B, C is relevant. Even sharing the very little we have to offer is a blessing in itself.

I’m hoping that for the rest of this month, I can just relax and slowly go about catching up with my things. Also, I hope there’ll be opportunity to spend time with friends near and far. This Saturday I have a preaching engagement followed by a youth camp, well, is actually a young adults camp. Then, I’m taking a break to PJ after Christmas to spend time with family and hopefully can catch up with some old friends I recently re-met through facebook. The third module of PLK is scheduled for end of January. And we are also planning for a retreat in March.

Thank you for your partnership in ministry. I pray that we continue our networking as we grow together and build the kingdom of God in our generation in our nation.

Ministry Update 091109: Leaving on a Jet Plane

2009-11-10T09:45:00.000+08:00

This morning I submitted my resignation. Never expected it to be so difficult. After all, I’ve cried myself buckets of tears through the months. I suppose it’s because I’ve grown too attached to the work, the people, and a bit too comfortable with the familiar. But it’s time to move on. And I must admit that I’m a bit fearful taking that delicate step onto the uncharted waters. However, the scope, prospects, potentials are way too enormous and exciting. Maybe it’s because I’ve not seen a solid team yet and that’s why I’m fearful. But I have a God who is faithful and that is enough. More than that is knowing that God had brought several brothers and sisters to come alongside me along the long months of waiting and discerning.

I’m leaving MBTS in early December. Although initially planned to start with the new ministry on 1st January, there are apparently some administrative procedures that requires some preparations and I can only officially be admitted 1st March. So I have a longer time to myself, to visit my students’ ministry and attend to some personal matters. However, January I have 2 one-week class in Kuching and in Penang to occupy me and February is CNY month. Not much break actually, come to think of it!

Please join me to pray for this transition period. November is pretty filled with preaching/teaching engagements. Just preached at AIMC last Sunday, my first experience preaching at 2 services and being interpreted into mandarin and hokkien! This week is filled with activities in campus, culminating with the graduation service this Friday. Then next Thursday, a team of us will travel to Gopeng for a 2-day trip to conduct the second module of PLK training. We return on Saturday afternoon and I have a preaching engagement the next day, Sunday. December, the holiday month but I have a preaching engagement plus a speaking engagement at a youth camp.

Once again, friends…I thank you for your partnership in ministry.

PS: anyone familiar with GPS unit/know someone who does? Can advice me on this? M planning to get a unit to help me familiarize with Ipoh as I’ll be travelling frequently there. Perhaps someone wants to upgrade to a better unit, you can pass me your old unit ;)

Ministry Update October 2009

2009-10-12T10:47:00.000+08:00

It has been a time of waiting and as a norm for many urbanites, it is also a very trying season. Because we are simply impatient creatures. So, this is my situation right now. Yet, prospects are promising. There had been both positive and negative responses to the new work I am initiating with a team of OA pastors. And right now is to know when to do what at the right “kairos” moment. Sounds exciting? Well, it is also pretty “fearful” for me as I need to know how and when to walk on the delicate steps of uncharted waters. I am happy for the many brothers and sisters that the Lord had bought into my path to offer input and partnership. The Malay proverbial saying is true; tak kenal maka tak cinta. Because unless one truly love and is burdened for the OA community, every effort will only be a possible failure. But if you are burdened, then every effort is a possibility to success. I know many good-intentioned advices that served as a precaution, yet, the truth is still this: ministry requires risks. If we dare not take the risk, we exhibit our lack of trust in the God who called us.

Last week was a week of class with 8 students ministering to the OA community. Some of them are based in the interior while some in the big cities. When I was preparing the course, cross-cultural ministry, I was a bit skeptical on how relevant the course is to the students. But after a whole week, I can confidently conclude that it is. Bringing it against the background context of our nation, the course was designed for every minister to go beyond racial lines and the understanding of cultures for an effective ministry is important. A lot was exchanged in the classroom. Knowledge, culture, understanding, dreams, prospects, etc. Also discussed was the forbidden hushed-hushed topic of church governance and politics. Well, I did say there was an exchange of many sorts! But this is relevant to me as I liaise with the various church/denominations to consolidate efforts in ministry to the OA community around the Cameron Highlands region.

There are not much activities planned in October. I’ve been asked to sit in a class my dissertation supervisor will be teaching in late October. Apart from that is grading of papers and planning for PLK. Also a lot of prayers to discern the next steps. I am a bit sad recently when I heard of some brewing problems in a local church. Sadder still to know that there is a possibility that the whole congregation may dissolve. Well, God has His ways to churn out faithful disciples. Often, we cannot comprehend it.

I have two preaching engagements in November (in a Methodist church and in a Lutheran church) besides a weekend class at PLK in Gopeng. Funny, as I observe. I am indeed moving mainly in the traditional church circles! Then December will approach before we prepare to bid farewell to 2009. Join me in prayer as we partner each other to be effective in what we do to honor God in Malaysia. Once again, I thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update: A Historic Moment

2009-09-22T10:12:00.000+08:00

Last weekend was the soft launch of PLK Semenanjung. PLK, or, Pusat Latihan Kristian is a joint initiative to establish a training center for the indigenous community around the region of Cameron Highlands. It was birthed last year when I was chatting with a group of students and realized we share the same vision and passion to develop the indigenous community in a holistic manner. So, what is PLK? It is an organization to train Christian leaders to be credible individuals in the church and an effective Christian witness in the community. It will take a modular approach where students will come for a full day study. Upon completion of 12 modules, they will receive a certificate. A module will be offered once every two months and will cover three areas: Basic Bible Knowledge, Ministry Skills, and Living Skills. Last Saturday, we conducted a class on Christian leadership and the next module will be held in November for Church administration. 6 participants turned up. Although the number was lesser than anticipated, we are happy because those who were present were very hungry for training. We are also happy with the participation because we realized we failed to publicize the school adequately and planning should be better organized. The venue was at Hosana Church in Kampong Pawong and meals were prepared by church members. For the next module, we will hold it at an unused kindergarten belonging to the Methodist church in Gopeng town itself. Although this venue may incur some additional expenses, the facilities are better; there are classrooms, bedrooms, tables/chairs, etc.

The organizing committee of PLK includes me, 2 OA pastors from the Anglican Church, and 2 OA pastors from the Methodist Church. Our partners include individuals from various church denominations that share the conviction to minister in raising the OA community in Peninsular Malaysia. At present we are seeking a church/Christian organization to adopt our work so that we have an accountability in terms of spiritual coverage and financial assistance. We realized that for any effort to grow efficiently, we must have someone focusing on the effort on a full-time basis. I pray that I have the opportunity to fully work in this ministry. It will be the first of its kind in Malaysia where we are training Christians in a holistic manner that prepares them not only to be good Christians but also enable them to earn a living in an honest and profitable manner. The Malaysian church is indeed the responsible of Malaysian Christians.

Some time ago, I was asked why I want to invest in this ministry. After all, the training needed is only basic and I am pursuing a PhD. I was both upset and disappointed at such a question. Who decides which group of people deserves this and not that? Who decides but men ourselves? In God’s eyes we are all created equal and beautiful. Sure the OA community may not be as “intelligent” as we understand intelligent to be. But who are we to decide that they do not deserve something better? I know I can only lead people to where I have been. If I have the highest qualification, then that is as far as I can lead them to. And surely the OA community has the potential. They only need an opportunity and a little attention. Both of which our urban society failed to give them, because we consider them “not intelligent.” That is why we are starting this training center. The present training structures just do not minister to them and the curriculums offered are just not relevant. The approach of our center will have a two-tier training where pastors/senior pastors will be upgraded from their bachelor/diploma level to master level and they will be training the new candidates for a certificate/diploma level. At present, we seek the recognition of participating churches before we can actually acquire ATA accreditation which will need a lot of effort and a long journey. Better still if an existing Bible School can adopt us into their organization. Then, we can “ride” on their accreditation.

Please pray for us. Our Anglican partners will meet with their bishop with the proposal and pray with us for a favorable response to this ministry. Pray with us for the networking with other churches that have their own OA outreach in various places scattered throughout the region of Cameron Highlands. These include the Methodist, Lutheran, FGA, AOG, etc.

Pray with us for the next module in November. Also, please remember to pray for me and my role in this new, exciting ministry venture. There’s a lot of uncertainty but a lot of opportunity to grow in faith. If God gave me the passion and conviction for this work, He’s got to help me accomplish this task He’s given me. It is God-sized and a mere sinner like me is powerless to do anything apart from Him.

Please pray for me to make wise and Godly decisions with options available and also to have the faith to venture into unchartered waters for the glory of God in this nation, in this generation. I have a week of classes in MBTS in early October, PLK training module in November, a preaching engagement in November, a speaking engagement at a youth camp in December.

Thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update September 2009

2009-09-01T14:01:00.001+08:00

August was a busy month, filled with activities. But I enjoyed myself tremendously. I have come to feel so at home with the indigenous community. And it is truly both a privilege and honor that they accept me as one of them. In fact, they have become so much a part of me.

Pastors and student pastors from Sabah, Sarawak, and central Peninsular came for four weeks of classes. On the three weekends here, there were activities aimed to bond us as a community. The first two weekends were the gotong royong in campus. Despite the physical challenge to trim trees, cut branches, and other landscape tidy-up, it was a great time of community work. And I have the pictures to prove it. The third weekend, we chartered a school bus to take us to Gopeng. About 40 of us were divided into 4 teams and each of the teams went into villages in the interior of Perak. One team went to Kampong Pawong, another to Ulu Groh, another to Ulu Kampar, and the other to Kampong Kapayang. It was an exciting trip. Despite being just a weekend trip, it was truly enjoyable. All participants had fun encountering new challenges and environment. We arrived in Gopeng on Saturday afternoon and made our ways to the four villages, arriving late afternoon and relaxing indoors from the pouring rain outside. There were night meetings scheduled for Saturday and the usual Sunday morning worship. After the morning worship, each team made our way back to Gopeng for the Sunday afternoon worship. We arrived back in MBTS campus at about 10pm.

The amazing testimony is that God truly loves us. He held back the rain till everyone reached our destination. He answered the honest prayers from our hearts when we prayed for wild boar to be caught. I was with the team that went to Ulu Kampar. It was a village that required about 55 minutes’ hike through muddy, narrow pathways into the jungle. We walked along muddy paths with thick greeneries on both sides. It was drizzling and made the muddy paths even more slippery. We arrived at Kampong Ulu Kampar at about 3pm and the moment the last team member stepped on the church ground, the rain poured super heavily. It was as if God was holding back the rain till we arrived at our destination. With the heavy downpour that lasted more than an hour, water supply was cut. It was because the water source came from the jungle and somehow, water supply will be cut when it rain heavily. Minutes after we arrived, news came that two wild boars were caught in the trap. The guys were very excited because they had been praying for it. The ladies, Ps Madia and myself were arranged to spend the night in a church member’s home while the guys slept in the church. Actually, I was a bit disappointed at that arrangement, knowing that the guys would be barbequeing the wild boar head late at night for supper. And if we joined the guys, it’ll be improper to return to a host’s home at midnight! After the morning worship on Sunday, we made our ways back to Gopeng. Upon arriving at the church in Gopeng, there were leeches on the floor brought back by those of us who went into the jungle. I did not realize that I was one of those “carriers.” I was wearing a black track-pants and suddenly felt as if it was wet in my right knee. When I pull up my pants, it was so bloody. Apparently, I was bitten by a leech. I just wanted to run to the bathroom to remove all clothes and take a good shower. When I was in the bathroom, I removed my t-shirt only to find a leech sucking my blood right on my stomach! What an experience…2 love bites from jungle leeches!

We had a student joining us for the first time. He’s from Pulau Bintan near Singapore. He’s an Indonesian Chinese and wrote a very inspiring song for Malaysia. I must confess that the lyrics touched my heart so deeply because it really echoes my cry for God to heal our land. The video is posted in my facebook site. (http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/SB.anakbangsaMalaysia?ref=profile)

Such talent, and I must add further that there are such talent among our own Sabah, Sarawak, and Peninsular students. I must further add that since my four weeks stay in the interior of Sabah in May, I have realized the vast potential in the Malaysian church. And it is this realization that prompted me to do more for them. And it became more attractive for me to invest into the Christian Training Center that I am initiating together with 2 Semai pastors. Jesus did not come to earth and stationed Himself in the city, requiring His followers to change their context in order to be His disciples. Instead, Jesus came and contextualized into our context to reach us at where we are and call us to be His disciples. Thus, the approach of our training center where we will go into the interior to reach the people, to teach them at where they are. In this approach, the teachers go into the interior to teach, instead of bringing the students out from their contexts. Please join us to pray for this God-sized project. It was last year when we were just chatting among ourselves when we realized we share the same burden to train the new generation of OA Christians and we devised this approach where we hope to raise the standard of the OA Christians from where they are, in their own context and familiarity.

September is a month for me to catch up on some paper work. There are term papers to grade, two preaching engagements, and two Saturdays to visit the new organization for me to get acquainted with. But I am still very hopeful for the Christian Training Center to take off through the network with another Seminary. I truly covet your prayers and your partnership in this huge dream. But I dare to dream it because I know I serve a big God.

Tough decisions

2009-08-10T20:01:00.000+08:00

It was a real tough decision that I was confronted with. It took much effort and tears to decide to remain in the BM work. But whether or not it should be from the platform of MBTS is all together a different issue. I had the last straw recently. If the head of the organization is supportive but I have a terrible colleague, I think I can continue on. If the head of the organization is not supportive but I have a good colleague, I can still continue on. However, when the combination is an unsupportive head of organization and a terrible colleague, I think there's no way I can continue on. I will only be frustrated every single day. Yes, I very much want to remain in the BM work and yes, I am pursuing this passion but, no, I doubt it will be from the platform of MBTS. There's more than one way to serve and I am opting for another platform to continue serving in the BM ministry.

Recently, I requested for a RM600 subsidy for a weekend trip for the BM students and there's no news of it at all after three weeks. An advance for RM500 was quickly approved, almost without the second wink of an eye for a weekend trip which involve foreign students. I was truly devastated by such a response. I suggested that we should get to know the people we minister before implementing anything new and this terribly arrogant colleague just snapped at me claiming that he has 15 years of field experience and he knows all there is to know. I have no field experience at all. I'm only a Malaysian, living in Malaysia, ministering to Malaysians. Cannot compare to an American ministering in the Asian field more than a decade!

Call me hasty, call me emotional, call me whatever. But imagine yourself in my shoes. Can you continue to serve with joy in such a context? It is too sad for me to have to make this decision. Most of the BM students are here in campus now and I have to hide this from most of them till an appropriate time. Is really a tough decision. Please pray for me. I greatly appreciate your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update August 2009

2009-08-04T10:38:00.000+08:00

It was just this morning when I stepped out of the gate that a middle-aged man with graying hair and a huge pot belly called me. No, I could not recognize him. And he had to introduce himself. He was my senior in college back in UM. And gosh, he looked so different with that huge pot belly. We did not chat. It was just an exchange of greetings. I think he was offended because my first reaction was to exclaim that the person I knew was not so fat! And yes, just like my sister sms-ed to me, I knew how to spoil a person’s day…

I have the privilege and opportunity to connect back with old friends. And I am still wondering at the significance of the events that unfold. Suddenly, the Lord is reminding me of my past? Old friends from school and college came back into my life, one after another. There’s something about it that I just can’t put a finger on.

Last weekend I was in the OA villages. One significant evening service I heard the Lord speaking clearly into my heart. He asked me if I am willing to give this up? I was enjoying worship in the midst of our indigenous brothers and sisters. And at the back of my head was still this offer to leave this and take up a position that comes packaged in prestige, honor, respect, not to mention a comfortable pay check. No, I was not willing to give that up. Difficult as it may be, I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back, no turning back…

The BM Module of STCM has started yesterday. Students from Sabah, Sarawak, and central Peninsular are all here. A few will come a bit later due to clashing demands in ministry. Please pray for us. The weekends will have the students do some gotong royong work in campus. They will climb trees, cut the branches, trim the grass, etc…Some of these stunts can be quite dangerous. Then the third weekend, everyone packs up for a weekend visit to the OA villages. They will be divided into several teams to visit several kampongs. The weekend before Merdeka Day, they will travel back home. A few will stay put a little longer to plan a Merdeka Day service concert with BMBC.

Please pray for me. Besides overseeing all activities, I’ll be teaching a class next week on the prophetic ministry in the modern church. Pray also for our trip to the OA villages. We are not getting any subsidy for this trip. And that truly upset me. Last year we got a subsidy because the BM students were needed to accompany other STCM students. This year we are on our own and my request for a subsidy has not been approved for almost 2 weeks now. I’m forgetting it. The Lord will know how to supply. And yes, I’m able to channel some blessing I received from a church in Ipoh to subsidize our activities.

In September there will be another visit to the OA villages in Simpang Pulai. This is a lay training seminar I am initiating with the local pastors. We are networking with several churches, including Anglican, Methodist, Lutheran, FGA (Penang). Also work in progress is our network with the SIB and AG churches in Peninsular Malaysia. Please continue to pray for this next big wave that will hit the Malaysian church…the rise and revival of the BM congregations.

The Good of the Old…

2009-07-28T09:30:00.000+08:00

FACEBOOK, it looks like I am pretty addicted to this social networking website. It is exciting to rekindle old friendships. For a start, I am not a person who keeps in touch through writing snail mails. I mean, gosh…that is like, so uncool. And the wait for replies, my…my hair grow white la. But wahlah…this is the electronic age. Once we have a person’s email address or hand phone number, we can send a message within seconds. Now this, me likey. Why…it’s because I am a super impatient person. Everything must move at the speed of light. And the LORD is teaching me difficult lessons on how I need to grow patience; after all, it is a fruit of the Spirit.

After more than twenty years, I met up with two former classmates. I must admit that I was a bit envious of them who have been in touch with old friends all these while. And they can keep track of who married who, what they are doing now, and which part of the world they are residing now. As they mentioned names, I can only stare at them blankly. I cannot recall more than half of them. Out of the familiar names, another half of them I have no mental picture of how they look like at all. It was great fun, taking that trip down memory lane but I came home pretty upset with myself. How come I cannot remember my classmates? How come my friends can recall how I use to kacau them but I have no recollection of that at all? I mean, this friend can even recall where I sat in class in primary school, my goodness…But the most saddening part for me is not remembering the list of names of my classmates. How pathetic I am…So, I tried to analyze myself. Why, and I kept asking myself, why can’t I remember my classmates? How come I am not in touch with anyone at all?

Well, I have my answer. I never looked back. Or rather, I failed to look back. I just kept going forward and continue moving forward without taking any effort to look back. At every stage, I met friends and when I move on, I made new friends, forgetting the old. That was me. Molded and conditioned by the world to be independent, the mark of a modern, urban individual – the self-made person. Pathetic, isn’t it? But praise God, I have a second chance through FACEBOOK to nourish my garden of friendships that had gone unattended for twenty over years. And why the Lord is offering me this opportunity? Because ministry is about people and people means relationship.

And I return to my favorite theory again…the significant 4-0 number. Hey, it is significant isn’t it? I mean it is the number of years the Israelites wandered in the wilderness. So, okay I have completed my 40 years of wandering in my spiritual wilderness. I am stepping into the Promised Land, tasting the goodness from the flow of milk and honey. Er hmm…not too good diet for middle age folks like me. Oops…well, age is relative, age is only numbers. But my body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit. The milk should be low fat and the honey not too sweet.

Okay, okay…I am just taking a break from the day long attempt at preparing my research proposal. It is funny that when you take a break from active study, it is so slow to build back the momentum.

Ministry Update 3: July 2009

2009-07-27T09:49:00.000+08:00

NU 23:19 God is not a man, that he should lie,
nor a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Does he speak and then not act?
Does he promise and not fulfill?

So here’s another update from me to share with all of you the important decision I have made. It has not been easy and I thank many of you who wrote encouraging emails to help me through the hard times. I am sure no one in his or her right Christian mind will turn away from an exciting move of God that is approaching and you will surely act on it and take the risks that come along with it. That is what has landed me in these two months of frustration, depression, and misery. Sounds so miserably, right? It was depressing all right and I think I sort of spread the misery through my updates to some of you. Well, I’m just sharing from the heart and we all know that the Christian life is an upstream struggling. Besides, God never promised us blue skies and everything nice.

I thank God for FACEBOOK. Yes, it’s great because I re-discovered lost friendships. Some of whom I have not met for more than twenty years. And recently I met two of them. It is funny that while we are in Penang all these while, we never bump into each other. Penang is really NOT THAT SMALL, after all. So I had dinner with two old friends at US Pizza and none could believe I am in ministry. Who would? God often pick the most unlikely candidate. And as I shared of what I am doing, one of them exclaimed that it surely has to be God’s calling for me to be doing what I am doing in the interior. This is actually a second confirmation and it came from an unbeliever. OK, so she is not quite an unbeliever but she’s a catholic who can hardly pray. How I arrived at my decision was at a point where I was too angry to continue on in an indecisive situation and I sort of lost my temper at God in prayer. Then He brought a college kid to knock some sense into me. Four degrees, three of them seminary masters and God brought an eager college kid to speak to me. I am humbled. Thanks brother, I know you are reading this right now. It is that phrase you mentioned that sometimes we need to shut one opportunity to ensure there is only one way. Well, we always want a plan B to fall back on just in case plan A doesn’t work out well. But that is not how it works in ministry. And the next morning as I was reading Numbers, the verses above literally jumped out at me. So, here I stand, fearfully venturing into a huge uncertainty with only God as my security. But that is enough.

The past two months were a real struggle. When you know you just must seize the opportunity to move along with God in an exciting work He is doing in this nation, He can stir things up in us that can be so unexpected. I do not enjoy sharing negatively and I know you do not enjoy reading them. But the truth is, we are fallen beings with all our ways prone to evil. I am still upset and disappointed at the parties that attempted to hinder the growth of the BM work and even those who are blind to see the approaching move of God. In fact, I feel sorry for them. One thing I do know is that nothing escapes the eyes of our watchful God. He will judge and reward accordingly. My plans now are to focus fully and begin sourcing for funds to grow the BM work. If the school cannot quite accept me and the BM work into its structure, I know I have a big God who cares enough for His church in Malaysia who needs to grow. The duty to care for the Malaysian church rests upon the shoulders of Malaysian Christians. And through the years, the Lord has prepared me for such a time as now to be strategically in a ministry that is already gaining momentum to be the next big wave to hit the Malaysian church. If you share this excitement in your heart, I invite you to join me in this ministry. I invite you to come alongside me to minister to the indigenous community in Malaysia. As Christians, we should lift a weaker brother as we run the race of life. And truly the Lord has blessed us with so much and shouldn’t we extend a helping hand so that our brother or sister in the interior can come beside us?

Please remember me in your prayers. I have not paid enough attention to my studies recently due to this dilemma. I am working on my research proposal and discussion questions. My motivation is the indigenous community. I know I can only lead them to where I am, therefore, this motivates me to push myself further. Our indigenous siblings deserve as much as we do, a good education and opportunity. I have availed myself to the Lord to make me His vessel to raise their livelihood, spiritually and materially. I know I may not be able to convince you to do the same but I hope you will at least partner me in this effort.

Thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update 2: July 2009

2009-07-21T08:46:00.000+08:00

I sound so fickle-minded. One minute this, one minute that. But the truth is, I am still undecided. Yes, I certainly want to remain in the BM ministry. This is a ministry that is gaining momentum right now in Peninsular Malaysia. I was in Johor and the Anglican church is looking for additional workers, not one but two. I was in Malacca and seven pastors came to the meeting wanting to know more about how they can study further to improve their ministry. After the meeting, they even asked me to send an email about the BM program so they can pass it to their friends who were not present. Last week, I received a call from Taiping, needing assistance in their BM ministry. Yes, I certainly want to continue in this ministry, but…there’s always the but. I really do not know how things in campus can be ironed out. Even the top management agreed that politics come into play and unfairness is present. So, I am asking myself…if I want to continue in the BM ministry, which platform shall I continue to serve? MBTS? But can I accept the bluntly acknowledged politicking in a Christian organization? I will constantly feel frustrated. I just prayed…truly the BM work is growing rapidly but do I have the privilege to continue in this work? Or maybe the Lord is taking me to another area of missions? The line is simply full time or part time involvement. Let’s face it, in any effort, we always need a full time person to fully develop the work. But if the effort is deemed as unimportant, there will not be a need for full time involvement. It all depends on the ministry players. And I know I can still be involved in missions, whether home or foreign, whether market place or otherwise. I sound like I am justifying a decision. But am I wrong? Wouldn’t it hurt more when unchristianness comes from Christians themselves? I have even concluded that there is no difference between the secular sector and the so-called Christian vocation. Both contain fallen human beings, stained with sin. So, what have I decided? Your guess is as good as mine…

Ministry Update: July 2009

2009-07-15T09:50:00.000+08:00

Praise God from whom all blessings flow,
Praise Him all creatures here below,
Praise Him above ye heavenly host,
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. AMEN.

The Doxology is sung by traditional churches towards the end of the worship service and is a good reminder to us all that indeed it is from God that all blessings flow. I am back from the mission trip to Johore and Malacca. When I arrived in JB, it started to rain. Apparently, it was hot and dry for a long while and I brought the rain. Actually, I did not realize that Penang rained too but it stopped when I returned to Penang .

I dropped by Singapore briefly to meet my thesis supervisor and returned to JB not feeling well. I was pretty afraid I might have caught the H1N1 virus while in Singapore . But praise God, the good Lord restored my health. The team had a lot of fun in Johor Bahru and in Kluang. It was the first time the Anglican churches there received a mission team. We ministered to the Sabah and Sarawak indigenous people there. Some were there because they are working in the army while the rest were there because Singapore offers better employment options. I preached at St Christopher’s Church on the first Sunday and at Kulai Anglican Mission Center the second Sunday. The team was in Johor Bahru till Monday when we traveled to Kluang and spent 2 days there. We slept everywhere in the church building and I took the “privileged” spot of sleeping before the altar (of sacrifice). We proceeded to Malacca on Wednesday morning. There was some miscommunication with our contact there and the hiccup messed up the trip quite a bit. However, we were still able to find time to visit the historic Christ Church , St. Paul ’s Hill, A Farmosa, although I did not have the opportunity to savor the famed satay celup! I returned to JB on Saturday afternoon while the team stayed on till Sunday. I had to leave the team early because Firefly changed its flight schedule 3 hours earlier. Not wanting to miss a worship service, I traveled back to JB and preached at the daughter church of St. Chris in Kulai. The rest of team were split into two back in Malacca, with one team ministering in Straits Baptist Church and the other at the SIB church.

I came back to the office on Monday morning to find a long list of emails that need to be attended to. And guess what? I was so surprised, happy, blessed to read of one email from a church in Ipoh asking me for my full name and mailing address because they want to bless me with RM3000 to pay partially for my school fees or to get a new laptop. WOW! It was so unexpected. It was a casual discussion with some students back in Ipoh after class when we were discussing how pathetic pastors are paid. I never expect anyone to pursue any further on that discussion. But apparently some students did and I am blessed. I planned to pay partially for my school fees, which is still pending unpaid since my official admittance into the PhD program in January. And I think I can also spare some to get a netbook.

Thus, the opening doxology…Praise God, from whom ALL blessings flow. I was standing at a cross road, undecided between two directions. At one hand is an offer from an NGO offering me a senior position and a good pay. On the other hand is my present ministry, where I am being paid peanuts and almost in a “cold storage” but impacting a growing work. But the first few days in JB had helped me decide. It will be extremely foolish of me to leave a growing ministry where I am strategically placed to churn workers and equip workers for effective ministry in the BM work. I realized that I will be extremely selfish if I opt for the NGO offer. Sure it pays more and I will get the “glamour” of my own office and proper recognition as I see myself as the second in command in its organization chart. But the problem with this picture is simply that it is not home missions and I am too in love with the indigenous people and too passionate in this ministry. So, I have decided to reject an offer that the former me would have eagerly grab. The present me would rather pursue an adventurous and exciting journey with a loving, caring God.

I was going through a difficult time. Torn between the person I was and the person I am. In fact, I was practical forced to confront what I really want in life. Am I still the ambitious, career-minded person or have I truly surrendered all to God as I pledged when I entered the so-called full-time Christian vocation? It was a depressing time having come face-to-face with who I really am today. I asked myself searching questions and it was indeed a tough decision. Buckets of tears were shed…no, I am just exaggerating. But to realize that the Lord had prepared me to be strategically placed in the BM work that is fast growing in such a time as now, it’s simply too awesome. And I know I can never forgive myself if I took an option that is self-centered and selfish.

Please pray for me. Please pray that every hindrance to the progress of the BM work will be removed and for fruitful opportunities to bring an impact and to make a difference to the vast and fast expanding BM work in this nation. Also, do remember me in prayer for the ministry appointments such as…TARC CF on 21 July, preaching at BJAC on 25 July, weekend mission trip to OA villages in Simpang Pulai on 1-2 Aug, class with the FGAC BM pastors on 5 Aug, class in MBTS 10-14 Aug on prophetic ministry in contemporary church, another visit to OA villages 22-23 Aug. There will be three preaching engagements in September, a one-week class in October, one preaching engagement in November and a speaking engagement for a youth camp in December with a pending mission trip planned for early December.

Once again, I thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update II: June 2009

2009-06-29T15:41:00.000+08:00

Dear partners in ministry,

I echo the statement of Dr Martin Luther, as he stood before the Diet of Worms…Here I stand, I can do no other. So, help me God…

I stand at a cross road today, undecided. It is a simple yes or no. Yet, each carries a series of serious consequences. Please pray for me, for wisdom and for discernment.

June is concluding and July starts with another session with the FGA BM pastors. The following day I will travel to JB. On Friday morning I will meet my thesis supervisor in Singapore. I will meet most of my team when they arrive on Friday night in JB. We will be in JB, ministering to the OA community, consisting of mostly East Malaysians who work in Singapore but staying in JB. Our host church is the Anglican church. We will stay here till Wednesday. Then we travel to Malacca where we will minister to another OA community. This is the Peninsular OA people group. Our host will be the Baptist and SIB churches. Two additional team members will join us here in Malacca. Our departure is also fragmented, as I may be traveling back to JB a day earlier than the rest. I am blaming Firefly for this. They changed their JB-PEN schedule a whole four hours earlier. Four team members will return to JB to catch the JB-PEN flight while two others who join us only in Malacca will travel Malacca-KL LCCT- PEN. Pretty confusing series of movements actually. Do remember us in prayer. Thank you.

Will update with the trip report upon my return on 12th July.

SB

Ministry Update: June 2009

2009-06-01T14:59:00.000+08:00

Ah, the month of June. This marks the entry to the first half of the year. How quick time flies. The seconds and minutes, then, the hours and the days. Needless to repeat that I was so blessed by the month long trip in the interior. It was a reverse culture shock for me to adapt back to city life…no it was nothing drastic, just my play of words to exaggerate. But I returned with a stronger passion for the ministry and I suddenly realized that as long as I am in my present capacity, there is just so much I can do. However, the work has so much more potential. It is frustrating for an eagle to be given the wings of a house fly. Please pray for me, the ministry, and mostly the ability to discern God in His marvelous work around us here in Malaysia.

Middle of the month, I have a class in Ipoh. This may be an extension point where the students may not need to come all the way up north to the main campus. Then early July is the mission trip to Johore and Malacca. I will briefly drop by Singapore to meet my thesis supervisor and hope to kick start my research proper. I received an invitation to initiate BM classes for master level students in Malacca. Yes, on one hand I am excited at the prospect. On the other hand…well, I am still asking myself whether it will be worth it to continue on in my present capacity that limits a ministry of vast potential because the leaders subscribe to its conservative policies.

Ministry Update: May 2009

2009-05-26T11:45:00.001+08:00

The Sunday after I returned from Sabah, I read an article on Teachers’ Day in the Sunday Star. Yes, the teaching profession…a profession I disliked but was led into it. After all, if you have students who send inspiring sms to you, wouldn’t you be encouraged? I am… despite my short-comings, their appreciation towards this ill-equipped teacher made every teaching effort worthwhile.

I was very looking forward to the one-month stink in the interior. I was getting pretty fed-up with the complexities at work. Yea, I know. We have that everywhere we go, in every office, of every industry. Ministry is no exception. The Friday, before I left campus, it was Teachers’ Day. That was 24Apr. Yea, you may be wondering why Teachers’ Day was celebrated then. Me, too. However, I was pretty uncomfortable with that tradition. To me, ministers minister for the Lord, not to gain recognition and honor before men. I find that some colleagues are getting addicted to such recognition. Teachers’ Day become an occasion to look forward to in order to be recognized and honored. This is so “unministry.” So, I was very and extremely glad to get away from such scenario to the simplicity that the jungles can offer.

Despite the schedule change for the AirAsia flight to Tawau from KL LCCT, a half hour earlier than originally scheduled, I was glad I was able to comfortably hop onto it. It was at McD that I was held up. That place is so super popular; the staff was not exactly super efficient though. When I finally landed in Tawau, it was approximately half past five in the evening and the day was turning dark in this side of Malaysia. The first meal served here was biawak or monitor lizard. It tasted great. In fact, after dinner I dropped by the students’ quarters and found a few of them slaughtering another lizard. One of them scooped out the heart which was still pumping, oozing out black, dark red streams of blood.

I had a meeting with the local leaders the next day, mainly discussing the partnership of the local Bible Training Center and MBTS. A lot was discussed and it filled my thoughts the following few days. There are so many things to attend to, to grow this ministry of vast potential and the eagerness of the local leaders further fuel my enthusiasm.

The week of class went smoothly. Two students left but two additions maintained the status quo. I think the privilege I discovered then was that one of the new additions was our cousin and now he is here and I had the privilege to teach him Christian missions! Wow, right?! We study Introduction to Christian Missions in the morning and study English in the afternoon. But we were not able to start our English class the first week because the books were not yet ready. So, our first English class was held in the Star Cineplex, watching Wolverine. Much to my disappointment, the students read the Malay sub-titles to understand the story! It was also quite a surprise for me actually, when I discovered that to a few of the students, that was their very first time visiting a cinema. And mind you, watching a movie in a small town like Tawau was not cheap, it cost RM9 per entry!

There was a slight change to my weekend schedule. The original plan was for me to visit Serudung Baru but the new schedule had me visiting Kalabakan the first weekend. I have to describe the visit more vividly here. See, on Saturday morning I was sent to town, to Tawau Baptist Church, where Ps Madia greeted me and brought me around town awhile. At about noon, we started our two hour drive to Kampong Rancangan Kalabakan. We stopped by a restaurant in Merotai which was famous for its soup, like sup tulang, sup ayam, sup lembu, etc. We sat next to a family of cousins. When our food arrived, we gave thanks and started eating. Apparently, the family of cousins was pretty uncomfortable with us praying before our meal. When their food arrived, they sang their prayer loudly and it was quite awhile too before they were satisfied enough to start eating their food!

We arrived at the kampong and it was almost 3pm. The day was hot, really hot but the kampong houses are built on stilts. There are hammocks under the houses where villagers lie in the shade to rest in the cool of the day. Ps Evelyn was relaxing on one such hammock when we arrived. I was brought to visit the village briefly. There was really nothing much to see. There’s the super famous Sungai Kalabakan where huge prawns are caught daily and sold. And it was super dirty, filled with mud and was teh- tarik in color. I was all ready to rough it out in the village. But to my surprise, I was put up in a rest house. See, there is a FELDA scheme next to Kalabakan. There is no piped water in the village, electricity comes from generators. Only now, electricity poles are erected to connect power to the village. However, the FELDA scheme has all the privilege of piped water and electricity. One of Ps Madia’s sisters works as a supervisor in the rest house in FELDA. And it was suggested that I spend the night there instead of in the kampong. Wah, I felt so undeserving…especially when I found out that they planned to put me in the suite in the rest house. Fortunately, the reservation made was a bit late and the suite was taken up by another guest and I ended up in a deluxe room. Despite that it was very comfortable. For the first time in seven days I felt clean after a good shower. There was air-con, hot water shower, television, and two comfortable spring mattresses in the room. I slept so soundly that night! Meals were at the restaurant in the rest house, which was the only decent restaurant around. And yes, you guessed it – Kalabakan prawns for dinner, Kalabakan prawns for breakfast, Kalabakan prawns for lunch. Well, that was originally planned until I “intervened” and changed the menu for breakfast.

Service at Kalabakan Baptist Church was at 9am but the kampong flexibility saw the service began at 9.30am. With my usual short message, the service ended before 11am and everyone was surprised that it was still so early. Ps Evelyn had expected me to preach for 2 hours! No, that was a joke.

The second week began smoothly too. The English books arrived and we also started our English classes. Only to discover that half the students cannot follow the syllabus. Thus, we have to put the books aside and start from the very beginning of building vocabularies and forming sentences.

There is still the kelawar (bat) that’s not cooked yet. But it is already almost three months old in the freezer. Some say, throw it away. Others say, there’s no expiry date. Regardless, the students are on a look out for exotic meats. On our list are items like tupai (squirrel), ular sawa (python), etc They also mentioned porcupine, ant-eater, etc. Thus far, I have also tasted eagle meat. I think the saying is true that everything taste like chicken. I mean, after tasting monitor lizard and eagle, both tasted just like chicken?!

Anyway, the second weekend I went to two nearby villages. Ps Anthony came to Kiulu Baru as early as 7am to drive me to an Iban village called Kampong Kuala Nansang. The service starts at 8am. We arrived early and spent sometime at the (church) chairman’s house. I had another round of breakfast here. At 8am, we proceeded to the church. This is a small church that was an outreach of Serudung Baru Baptist Church. Service ended at about 9.45am. After a short exchange of greetings, we proceeded to Serudung Baru. Here, there are a lot of youth. Worship is led by the youth, complete with a team of four tambourine dancers. I met a very interesting character here, a 74-year old Burmese man who came to Sabah in 1956. He usually worships at the English church of Tawau Baptist Church but on this particular Sunday, decided to drop by the village. After the service, I had lunch at the pastor’s home located behind the church. We were later joined by the Burmese man together with his local friend. Mr. Winter, had loads of story to tell us, the younger folks. And it was indeed a blessing to hear stories of early church planting against the back drop of Malaysia-Indonesia Confrontation era.

My next preaching engagement was at the Combined Mothers Day celebration. I was given little information regarding this meeting. Slowly, I discovered that it is going to be a huge affair. In fact, it is planned as a gathering of women folk in all of Sabah (Baptist) churches in conjunction with Mothers’ Day. I was shocked to hear that. I was not expecting it to be such a big affair. But then, it is probably scaled down to nearby churches. It’s not too practical to travel far just to attend a one-morning gathering. So, I can console myself that it probably attract just nearby churches, maybe three or four village churches will come together.

However, at a home fellowship just a few short days from the planned celebration, I discovered that there will be delegates from afar traveling all the way to Kiulu Baru for the event. Suddenly, I sort-of, panicked. I mean, I do not consider myself a good speaker and here it is, a huge affair involving a huge participation and the little unknown me, invited to address the crowd! This is really a huge honor I do not deserve.

The interesting part of the culture here in the interior is that while the church service was scheduled for 10am. Most arrived as early as before 9am. Even though they stay just a stone’s throw away. Yes, that included me…because I followed some students and my hosts here. So, we were at the church for more than an hour with nothing to do except staring at each other and counting flies. Slowly, guests arrived from near and far. Some traveled for less than half an hour to arrive at Kiulu Baru while others took a journey of between two to three hours to arrive. There were representatives from women fellowship of various kampong churches. I think about six or seven churches were represented. It was a simple celebration with worship, message, presentations from various delegates, a sketch from the youth, concluded by the presentation by members of the women fellowship of the host church.

I was pretty nervous about delivering the message. Especially after discovering that it was going to be a huge affair. Well, it went ok except the end. I was pretty upset with myself for a while over how it ended. I wanted to close the message with a response song and have asked the worship leader and musician whether they knew a song I suggested. Both said they knew the song. However, at the closing the worship leader suddenly went clamoring for the transparency and could not find the song to lead the congregation. Later I discovered that this hiccup was due to the cultural differences between me and the local worship team. From where I come from, I would invite the worship team to return to the stage and to lead the response song. However, I discovered that the culture here is that when the preacher asks for a response song, the preacher is expected to lead the song!

I have an unscheduled preaching engagement the following Sunday. My host, the pastor of Apas Balung Baptist Church asked me to preach and I obliged. Well, I get to recycle my message, again. That has got to be a message most used. A whole four times!

There was a Tuesday where we had a prayer meeting in the nearby church. It was quite an experience. The past few days were dry and the water tanks were losing water fast. Everyone was praying and hoping for rain. Although the previous two nights rained, it was not as heavy as the rain that poured that Tuesday night. It was like in the movies. A jeep-load of us…8 of us packed into an old jeep traveling through terrain similar to the Camel Adventure gear. The rain was pouring heavily; the lightning gave an eerie fear while the thunders roar a deafening scare. All gathered in the hall of a quiet village church, all 13 of us, when suddenly the electricity supply was cut. Well, power cuts are a norm here, but on this particular evening, it added some flavor into the meeting. We were praying in the dark…in pitch darkness. The meeting leader read from the dim rays of a torch light. It was really quite an experience…praying in the dark, against the deafening roaring thunders with lightning of terror all around outside the church walls. Wow! Sounds like some movie scene, eh?

The final week was relaxing. We completed the syllabus by the end of week three and the whole week four was spent on revision. The students sat for the final test, worked on their project papers, and even requested an English test. Some fared well while others did not. However, on Friday, we carried the classroom to Tawau town and had another round of movies. Night at the Museum 2 was not a comedy I would recommend. We went to town early as someone told us that in Tawau, there is a morning show; only to arrive at the Cineplex to find it locked. We spent about an hour playing at the nearby arcade before the Cineplex was opened. Only to discover that the earliest show was at 12.00 noon. But we already had a lunch appointment at 12.30pm, so we went window shopping, walked a lot, and went to lunch before catching the 2.30pm show. Well, this time two of the students had to return to their home village for ministry. We were treated to a fanciful lunch by a friend and we return to the village with food stuff for barbecue. There were very decent servings on the table, except the squirrel meat. When I saw it before it was cooked, it looked just like a hairier rat. Well, it tasted like…chicken. A lot of bones with little meat.

The days progress swiftly. Suddenly the slow hours had accumulated to days and weeks. Soon it was my final week here in the interior. I sent sms to close friends and relatives…to update them that I am still surviving in the tamed wild here in Sabah. I feel too at home here to actually miss Penang. While I enjoy ministry, the circumstances made me ready to leave MBTS. Local potentials must be realized. After all, each Christian must help the other to grow in the fullness of Christ. But I do know that my strict adherence may sound radical to those who champion convention. And such clash of opinion often made me appear rebellious. But hey, wasn’t Jesus a “rebel” in His days? I’m just being like my Master.

Anyway, rumblings aside…I thank all of you for your partnership in ministry. Knowing that you are with me made the journey more worthwhile. Once again, thanks for the prayers and partnership.

Ministry Update II: April 2009

2009-04-22T21:35:00.001+08:00

Dear Ministry Partners,

Greetings again from me along with Update II for April 2009. This is because of my travel plans this Sunday and the lack of internet access in the weeks ahead, thus, you will only receive an update from me late next month. Please remember me in prayer as prayer is both powerful and prerequisite for effective ministry.

I will travel to Tawau this Sunday and scheduled to teach Introduction to Christian Missions at Pusat Latihan AlKitab Baptis in Kiulu Baru. As I will be spending 4 weeks there, our ministry partner in Tawau had arranged for me to visit various villages for the 3 weekends I have there. So, the first weekend, I will visit Serudung and on Sunday will preach at Serudung Baptist Church. The following weekend, will visit Kalabakan and on Sunday I will preach at Kalabakan Baptist Church. FYI to GBCians, Kalabakan is Fendy’s hometown and I will probably have the opportunity to visit his family and deliver some greetings. It is also a place super famous for super large prawns from Sungai Kalabakan. The third weekend I will stay put in Kiulu Baru as I will be preaching at the Mother’s Day Celebration at Kiulu Baru Baptist Church. These engagements are for preaching in BM.

Please pray for:
Me and the travel plans. Also pray for good, strong health as I can expect to savor local exotic delicacies
The students and congregants in the various villages
My aging mother, home alone

Once again, thank you for your partnership in ministry. Will return Penang on Saturday 23May.

SB

Ministry Update April 2009

2009-04-01T15:08:00.001+08:00

The last few weeks was so slow that I was super relaxed to the point of falling sick. Literally. I am a very work-oriented person and even the slow days that would last for something like seven or eight weeks was unbearable. Sure it gave me the time needed to prepare class lessons, and it is not that I totally have nothing to do but I do not need three days to prepare a two-hour class. And I did manage to draft three complete course lessons within four or five weeks. So, I was so relaxed to the point of feeling sick. I did fell into some spiritual depression of sorts. One thing after another came just when I was about to get out of it. There were issues of both internal and external proportions. I know the Lord allows things to happen the way it did for a reason and I always learnt my lessons the hard way. Perhaps, it is because I am such a difficult student.

A good friend confided in me that her marriage had fallen apart. I was so, completely, and utterly devastated. I know this couple, faithful serving Christians. And because of that, I am finding it extremely difficult to accept how far the husband has strayed from his faith and how deep in sin he has fallen. I realized that if I feel so much hurt, the wife must be feeling even worse. It is no fun feeling miserable. I complained to the Lord. I cried out to Him to take me out of this misery but nothing miraculous happened. The next morning, the issue was still swirling in my mind until a still small voice spoke to me saying, NOW you know what it really means to love the sinner, to hate the sin.

Another issue I have to confront is an extremely insecure colleague. Thus far since his arrival middle of last year, he did nothing more than throwing his tantrums like a spoiled brat when things are not the way he expected. But the latest outburst was pretty controlled. Anyway, he began being polite after discovering I am a PhD student. But I really do not know how long I can hold on with such a person in the ministry team. He seemed to conveniently blame me for the things he failed to do. When other ministry players appear to treat him coldly, as he claimed, I am blamed as part of the attempt to force him out of office. I discussed teaching approaches with a colleague and it became decisions made without his knowledge. I really have no idea why he is so insecure, so suspicious, and so paranoid.

I really love ministering with the indigenous community. It is the feeling like, hey…this is what I have been looking for. By the way, my dissertation topic is along this line. But the truth is, with the situation around, I am very ready to leave MBTS. I do not know if the Lord will take me to the field or to another aspect of ministry. But I am feeling very drawn to home missions. I enjoy teaching and preaching. I enjoy rural simplicity that minus the urban complexity which has much entered into the church community. I am finding it extremely repulsive because complex policy and politics only serve to divide rather than unite the church.

April starts with another exciting class with the BM congregation pastors in FGAC, the second installment of the monthly schedule. There is a preaching engagement at a Lutheran church on Easter Sunday. Then at the third week is another Cultural Anthropology class with the BM students who are mainly from the Ipoh and Gopeng interior. The following weekend I will hop on the plane to Tawau for four weeks. And no, I will not be swinging from tree to tree. I will be teaching Introduction to Christian Missions at Pusat Latihan AlKitab Baptis in Kiulu Baru. PLAB is our partner and we are initiating a sort of twinning program. The three weekends I have in Tawau will give me the opportunity to visit a few kampongs. Thus far, what has been planned is a weekend in Kalabakan and a weekend to stay put in Kiulu Baru. I was asked by my friend and student to preach at the combined mothers day celebration. I do not know how they will be celebrating it and I also wonder why of all persons, I was invited to preach at the occasion. I am not a mother, never worked with the women ministry or even with children. With the exception of VBS where I took every opportunity to relive lost childhood.

It will be end of May when I return to civilization. No, Tawau is not that rural lah…Anyway, there is a planned class in Ipoh in June which is yet to be confirmed, both its venue and dates. But this class in Ipoh will afford me some time to meet some friends in Ipoh and savor its cuisines. I must compare if there is any other city in Malaysia that can offer food as good as those found in Penang. The trip should also provide me with some fresh illustrations for my sermon at the end of June in BJAC. I am participating in a mission trip to Johore in early July, at the invitation of an alumni. But I will travel a day earlier than the team so I can drop by Singapore to meet my thesis supervisor who is based there.

The rest of July is to prepare for the BM module of STCM in August. I have a class to teach on the second week but still do not know what to teach yet. Yes, I am usually more organized than this but this is an elective for those who had already taken the core subject that will be offered on that week. So, my name will not appear on the official STCM brochure now being circulated around the churches. September is another slow month with one preaching engagement and one weekend trip to Simpang Pulai. October is also pretty slow with a one-week class. Thus far, November seems pretty slow too with one preaching engagement and December one speaking engagement at a youth camp.

I really need more and new challenges. I am already so familiar with most of the things I am doing, it is becoming a boring routine. Perhaps some of you reading this may be thinking…ha, she should be attending prayer meetings and cell group meetings, and what nots. You know what? You are right. And this is something I am struggling. I discovered something sinister recently while casually chatting with a colleague. I found that there is an unexplained reluctance to participate in church activities, especially prayer meetings. I thought the problem was just me being lazy. But as I was chatting with this colleague, she also realized that there is an unexplained reluctance preventing her from engaging in church activities in her church. Somehow, there is a draw towards seminary activities and busyness that seem to pull us back from engaging in church ministries. Then we began to observe our other colleagues…most, or nearly all, are not regularly attending prayer meetings in church. Worst, most are not engaging in church activities apart from doing it as part of their job description. Then a few older colleagues started to share of encounters of a spiritual kind at various locations in campus. Wah…this is getting exciting, right? Then stay tuned for the coming soon and next change…

Ministry Update 2: March 2009

2009-03-16T10:37:00.000+08:00

I am tired, very tired. I often question if my sacrifice and effort is worth it to pursue an ideal that half the Christian population cannot comply. I question how we can compromise on the quality and services to our own fellow believers, which ultimately is our worship to our God. I ask why we resort to bending rules and regulations, simply to comply with our own whims and fancies. In the first place, why have rules if it’s not meant to be followed? Why do we always use “case by case basis” as an excuse to bend rules? I mean, I understand that we cannot be too rigid or too legalistic. I understand the need to be flexible, flexible, and flexible. But I do not understand why we often try to find an excuse to compromise our faith and beliefs. I find it easier to accept opposition from non-Christians than from Christians, especially Christian “leaders.” I sound pretty much like a rebel and so anti-establishment. But no one will rebel if there is no reason to rebel. Just the same as there will be no smoke if there is no fire. People say it’s unhealthy to compare. But if there is fairness, no one will bother to compare.

As members of the fallen human race, I know all of us have our own faults and shortcomings. But if we confess to be Christians, then why can’t we strive to exhibit Christian values in our lifestyle? If we are no different than our friend or colleague who is not a Christian, that will mean Christ died for nothing and the Bible is but a fairy tale book.

Jesus teaches that,

^{MT 7:1} "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. ² For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

But he also teaches that,

^MT7:16 By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? ¹⁷ Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. ¹⁸ A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. ¹⁹ Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. ²⁰ Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.

I think I need a break. A break from the complexities and politics of the urban church (or Christian organization). I have had enough of so called Christian ministers clamoring for titles and positions, not to mention wanting to be served and to be popular. All these to the extent of compromising their given task, which is, as I mentioned earlier, is our form of worship to our God. I really look forward to entering the jungle again, back to the basic necessities and back to the simplicity of the Christian faith.

I just asked the Lord. I long to serve You. Just and simply serve You, which is my heart’s desire. To be solely and wholly devoted to You. Simply to serve as Your servant and to fulfill my calling as a humble servant. But I am feeling very frustrated and very bound up. There are all these complexities here and there and everywhere around me. Complexities created by men as means to boost their own ego and in its process profane the sanctity of the Christian ministry. And I long to know whether the Lord is grieved, what can be done to confront this issue? But I know God is merciful and loving. I’m yet to come near to be like Him. The day will truly and surely come when each of us will be judged. And I long to receive a word of praise from my God, not a rebuke. So, despite the struggle, I have resolved to keep the good fight of faith. Because my God is a great God.

Like how I had started, I am recalling my feeling of tiredness. I am tired, very tired to be striving in what appears to be a lone struggle. If the opposition is outside the church walls, this is understandable. But how do you reconcile when the “opposition” is within the church walls? When men and women who have served the church (or Christian organization) for so long and we should be regarding them as our mentors and teachers, yet it is them that contradict Biblical values?

Ministry Update: March 2009

2009-03-05T10:39:00.000+08:00

Urbanization…such a big word. A phenomenon that is infecting the whole world. A phenomenon that attracts, entices, and persuades. Rural folks flock into the cities for various reasons. People like the big cities for its modernity, sophistication, and amenities. But urbanization carries with it the evils of materialism and complexities of relations. People think we are “advance” if we are modern, indulging in all the complexities that kill our innocence.

Wah…this is really technical. I wonder why I started this piece in such a manner. Just to prove my point, actually. We often get carried away in wanting to impress the person next to us, an attribute of the fallen nature. And sadly, we unconsciously (or maybe consciously) import such mindset into the Christian circle. Recently, I attended a pastor installation service. The candidate is a good friend that I’ve known for several years. Although I do not know him very well, but well enough to know that this is a man after God’s heart. His “track record” of ministry proves it. I’m glad and I rejoice together with the church for this brother.

It was at the dinner after the service that I picked up a pretty disturbing viewpoint from among certain church leaders. Okay, I’m used to being observant, having being trained as a sociologist who engages in participation observation. My ears and my eyes are trained to pick up “social patterns” and it’s really like a second nature to me. I observed and I am saddened as I hear how church leaders talk about the so-called full time Christian vocation. We encourage people to enter into full-time work and yet, we seem to categorize each commitment according to their prior secular involvement. You see, the Christian leader that was going on and on about this issue was expressing how he admires people who leave their “professional occupation” to enter into “full-time” ministry. Is it only admirable for people who have “social standing” to enter “full-time” ministry? I have nothing against anyone entering the full-time Christian vocation, regardless of their background. But it seems that the Christian population sympathizes or looks down on the full-time work. It is a big sacrifice to enter into full-time ministry for those who have been earning big bucks in the secular sector. But it doesn’t matter for those who have been earning peanuts. After all, there’s no difference in the salary they command. I mean, if Christians themselves think that the full-time Christian vocation is meant for those “misfits of society,” how do we expect the non-Christians to think any better of us? It looks like even Christians themselves consider the full-time vocation as an avenue “to save” the unwanted of the secular sector. Hey, when considering my “salary” it has always been my “secular” degree that makes the deciding figure. Even Christians themselves are not recognizing their own formal training. Okay, okay…it’s not the papers that matter. That I acknowledge…it is the journey along the way that makes the difference. Granted! But hey, if the Christian community herself thinks lowly of her dedicated members and efforts, how on earth are we ever to be “salt and light” in making a difference to society around us? We are no different than the person outside the church. In other words, we only fantasize about being a salty salt when we actually have lost the saltiness.

Perhaps we lack credible leaders, spiritually discerning leaders. We often assume that a person in a “high position” in a secular job is a good candidate to lead church affairs, without even considering the spiritual health of that individual. Can we actually accept a church leader who is a young Christian, spending umpteen years steep in another faith but just converted, say less than 5 years?...and because this person was a “professional” it is impressive enough to grant a leadership position? Wow! Personally, no. But I know it is an obvious, resounding “yes” by some quarters. I stick to my belief that decisions not carefully made today may not cause harm today itself but it will certainly cause damage tomorrow or the day after. And sometimes, the damage may be just too severe to undo, to the individual, the person being ministered, and to the Christian community as a whole.

Wah…pretty deep eh? My point is, we need to restore the “dignity” of the Church. There was a time in history when church leaders are respected individuals of society, that the pastor is the most learned person in the village. And all that was lost in the process of secularization, when money and prestige became the measurement of one’s honor. The advent of urbanization further emphasizes this factor and we slip further down the spiral of materialism. And with that deteriorated church-related vocation in the eyes of community, both Christian and non-Christian.

Honestly, I’m not sure if it’s worth the effort to keep believing in an “ideal Christian community” where everyone’s focus is in allowing God to mold them, where everyone strive to be spirit-controlled, where everyone submits to each other and serves each other just the way the Bible prescribes it.

I also had a new experience recently. Based in the seminary, ministering to the academic audience has become a norm, but I had the privilege to minister to a professional crowd. I don’t know how I fared but I hope to learn along the way together with the rest. In fact, it was sort of a revision for me to dig up lessons and notes I left untouched upon leaving the pastoral ministry. And I believe that there is relevant, up-to-date ministry approach that I can learn from this group of BM pastors in FGAC.

The year has quickly entered into its third month. Affairs of the world and our nation continued to impact us. We have a national partner from BA (Lita’s team-mate) who married an American missionary and the couple is now back in the States. I was chatting with him online in Facebook today. He is looking for a job and his wife is pregnant. I don’t know how to help him, except to pray. Being Indonesian in the States will not offer a bright prospect under current circumstances. And his wife is pregnant…

I was practically glued to the PC the day the Perak state assembly created history. I confessed that I could not concentrate on work at all the whole morning as I closely followed live reporting. Like many others, I could not hold back the tears as the events unfold. Malaysia, o Malaysia…my country, my home. Not perfect but there is HOPE. Let us persevere to pray for a complete breakthrough in our land.

I hope the Christian community will seize the opportunity of the day to aggressively make a difference. The change must start from within the church if we are ever to be the change agent for our nation. The change must begin from each individual and I pray the change will begin from me. So help me God.

The year ahead is full of activities for me as I took note recently. There are teaching and preaching appointments in every month, right till the end in December. Looks like an exciting year ahead. Please pray for me as we partner in ministry to make a difference in this generation in this nation.

Malaysia O Malaysia…

2009-02-18T11:44:00.001+08:00

It has grieved many Malaysians and without doubt, it must have grieved our Lord. The political landscape here had turned so ugly. Fabricated lies filled the media minute after minute. Truth has been distorted to cover those in authority. When I read the article by RPK yesterday, my eyes swelled with tears. He wrote what may appear to be his last article to fellow Malaysians as his case was being tried in court today. However, the hearing was postponed to next Monday. Perhaps he will prepare another last words to us.

The sensational news of partially nude pictures of Selangor’s state assemblywoman took prominence in the news. I do not know why Malaysian politics has fallen into such depths of unethical portrayal but since when is sleeping in the nude in the privacy of one’s own room become a sin? Clearly it is a desperate attempt of some quarters that has nothing else better to do but to stir confusion, attention, and cheap publicity for themselves.

However, Malaysia…this is my country and my home. She may not be perfect but she is still my country, still my home. Malaysia is still the heritage of God to His church in Malaysia. It is still the responsibility of the Malaysian church to initiate the rightful claim of God over this land. Our national anthem:

Negaraku, tanah tumpahnya darahku

Rakyat hidup, bersatu dan maju

Rahmat bahgia, Tuhan kurniakan

Raja kita, selamat bertakhta

Rahmat bahgia, Tuhan kurniakan

Raja kita, selamat bertakhta

Truly, the rightful King shall reign on His throne over Malaysia. Let the church declares this. Jesus is that rightful King to reign on the throne in Malaysia.

How are we ever to bring an impact to our nation? I think the only way is to look inward, to ourselves. I believe that the church should be influencing society. On the contrary, the society has been influencing the church. We allow this to happen when we use worldly standards to measure spiritual matters. We ended up with practices that are less than Christian, or worse, unchristian. If the Bible teaches equality, do we practice equality in church? If the Bible teaches fairness, servant leadership, humility, do we see these in the church? Instead, we often find Christians, leaders in particular, enjoying the limelight and join the crowd in clamoring for titles, for positions, for recognition. Perhaps I am being too critical. But shouldn’t Christian leaders themselves know the Bible well enough that if more is added, more is expected? The passage in the gospel of Matthew (22:1-14) tells a parable of how many were invited refuse to attend the banquet. The host sent his invitation to others and the banquet hall was full. However, some who were unprepared were thrown out. The very significant verse here is in verse 14: Matt 22 v 14

"For many are invited, but few are chosen."

The question to all of us is this…we, as Christians, are invited but how many wants to be chosen?

While we grieve over the sins of our nation, I question ourselves: are we without sin to cast the first stone? Instead, I think we should pray for renewal within us, first and foremost. If not, the enemy will hold something against us. Then, and only then, do we have the right to speak of righteousness, justice, fairness.

Why am I being so critical of Christian leaders? Simply because I have had just enough of church politics. And by church I mean all Christian organizations. I am tired of the unchristian manners practiced within organizations claim to exist in God’s name. That is using God’s name in vain. Often these unchristian approaches are Christianized through claims of spiritual discernment. But hey, if one’s live does not display godliness, that is just an excuse to exercise tyranny. (Matt 7 v 15)

"Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. ¹⁶ By their fruit you will recognize them

Perhaps I am being too idealistic. After all, we are all fallen human beings living in a fallen world. But that is reason enough that all the more we as Christians must portray Christ likeness…so we can rightly be the witness, the testimony, the ambassador of the Light, the Love, the Grace.

I want to be the few who are chosen, not among the crowd who are invited. I want to keep my ideals although the price to pay is constant disappointments. But I believe it will be worth the effort and the sacrifice that I shall remain unshaken despite the circumstances. My constant prayer is that the Lord will grant me a spirit like that of His servant Habakkuk (Hab. 3:17-19) who can still rejoice in the Lord despite the circumstances because his faith is rooted in God alone.

Malaysia, O Malaysia…I know the Lord wants to gather you under His wings just like a hen gathers her chicks (Matt. 23:37; Luk. 13:34) but you are not willing. Malaysia, O Malaysia…my country, my home.

17Feb09

And He made all things beautiful in its own time…

2009-02-18T11:26:00.001+08:00

It was just a bookmark. But it made me upset…why should it? It bears an encouraging passage from Paul’s letter to Timothy, 2 Tim 2 v 15

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.

The bookmark was addressed to a teacher, followed by the verse. But I’m no teacher. Yet, it’s actually encouraging me to be a teacher…But what’s wrong with being a teacher? Perhaps it was what I saw it represented. When I was in the university, the only financial aid that I was short listed for was the Ministry of Education scholarship. I hated being a teacher for the fact that teaching appeared to be a monotonous profession, where you teach the same thing over and over again, year after year after year. Besides, it’s binding…tied to the Ministry of Education and subjected to be posted anywhere in Malaysia. Gosh, how can I ever survive if I were to be posted to some rural towns? There was no other option and I had to barely survive varsity years through the FASIS, father and sister, scholarship. Since then, I seemed to be against anything that may suggest teaching because I saw it as restricting my options and choices.

The bookmark was a gift from Chooi Fuan. I was not exactly thrilled, but she told me that I would be a teacher of God’s Word, who should correctly handle the word of truth. But the long journey had not yet begun for me to be molded as a teacher. It only came at the 1997 economy slowdown and I was unemployed for about 4 months, finally landing myself into a teaching job in a Chinese private high school. God really has a great sense of humor in bringing me there. I hated teaching and I equally dislike the Chinese educated population. Can you blame me? I was treated like an outcast in the Chinese community in college simply because I do not speak mandarin…and I can still remember how I argued and debated with a senior who told me proudly that, the essence of being Chinese is in knowing the mandarin language. What rubbish…and this guy is now the exco of Perak’s illegitimate BN government.

My short stink at teaching, about two year’s worth, brought deep impact. Not only did it help me to tolerate and befriend the Chinese educated population, it also showed me how deep an impact it could bring to the lives of the students I taught. It has been more than 10 years since my teaching years but I am still in touch with some of those students. That was exactly before my entry into the so called full time Christian vocation. The pastoral experience lasted about five years. I know I do not have the pastoral gift to be an effective pastor but I also know I must be a pastor to be effective in teaching pastors. Hence, the pastoral years. Sometimes, you just cannot fully comprehend a certain thing until you have actually and personally experience it. And as I looked back, truly I can declare as the preacher said, He made all things beautiful in its own time.

The passion for teaching God’s word surfaced slowly and strongly. But today I can honestly say, it is a passion that keeps me going in ministry. I may not be the best but I know by God’s grace I am good. And I want to keep improving, knowing that my God deserves only the best and only the best do I want to offer to Him. So, dear partners in ministry, please hold me accountable to this…remind me of this pledge that I must always offer the best to my God. In fact, I will consider it a sin if I offer anything less than the very best to God. After all, He gave me His very best in Jesus Christ. The reason I am putting myself through grueling studies is not for anything else but to seize the opportunity to better myself so that I can always be striving to be better than the best of what I can offer to my God. After all, we can only offer out of what we have.

The rest of February followed by March are pretty slow but it allows me time to prepare the many lessons coming in April, May, June, August, and October. Not to mention the monthly sessions in FGAC and the STCM activities. I look forward to having more time in teaching…after all, it is not only teaching but learning that takes place in class. Finally, I need to comment that it’s difficult having to return to student life and I am slow in getting back to discipline myself to read and to study. Somehow, asking someone to do assignments seem more attractive and fun than having to do assignments myself…

16Feb09

Ministry Update: February 2009

2009-02-05T09:30:00.000+08:00

The year had started adventurously for me, with a trip to Medan-Sidikalang, followed by Kiulu Baru, Tawau in Sabah, followed by the anxious entrance exam which by God's grace I passed, and the CNY week. Now I am catching my breath as I settle to the routine. But let's face it, I am a work-oriented person, so a busy schedule is what keeps me alive. I have been praying to the Lord for more opportunities of service and ministry. It looks like He is slowly answering my prayer and I am both excited and filled with joy. Trully the joy of the Lord is my strength. Circumstances around me may seem pretty discouraging at times but the Lord is always faithful and just. A brief look at my schedule 2009...

January...teaching a one-week class in Tawau
March...starting a once-a-month, March till November, class with pastors of the BM church, FGAC
April...teaching a one-week class in main campus, MBTS Penang
End April till late May...teaching a one-month class in Kiulu Baru, Tawau
June...teaching a one-week class in Ipoh, or Gopeng-Simpang Pulai
August...tentative schedule for a one-week class
October...teaching a one-week class in main campus, MBTS Penang

The class in Ipoh will be a trial class at the request of some students. The venue is not determined yet. But I'm not worried. It can be as rural as the Pawong church and yes, Chee Lock and company, I really do not mind that condition. It looks like I am slowly becoming a jungle woman. Pretty scary, right? Yesterday, the students in campus were doing some campus cleaning and someone caught a baby wild boar. My first reaction was to bbq that poor chap. We immediately plan how to lure wild boar senior to our stove. My, what jungle talk...

I recently sent a proposal to a few individual friends to ask their opinion and comments regarding a dream for a new ministry. Well, I am amazed at the encouraging response thus far. But I know I must discern for God's timing to launch this work. Even right now, I know the Lord is calling individuals to share the same passion to reach inward to the rural, jungle within Malaysia. Please continue to pray for the ministry to the indigenous community. They may be poor and lacking but their simplicity and zealousness, a lesson for all of us urban freaks. I am enjoying the fellowship of the tribal community. Perhaps I am just too fed-up with the complexities of the urban society, some filled with hypocrisy.

Please pray for my studies. I have starting my gruelling journey towards a PhD, an effort I would like to dedicate to the indigenous community of Malaysia. For this first year of study, I will be exploring all resources on the various tribal people groups in Malaysia, both in Peninsular and in Sabah and Sarawak. Later, I will narrow the study to a single tribe. The area of research will focus on the raising of local leaders in the tribal community, how age and gender impact leadership opportunities.

This Sunday I will preach at the Jelutong Chinese Methodist Church and no, I am not preaching in Mandarin. I will preach at the English congregation at the extremely early hour of 8am on a Sunday morning.

Finally, let us continue to pray for Malaysia...in particular for Perak. And once again, thank you so much for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update 2 for Jan 09

2009-01-22T14:33:00.001+08:00

The year started in an adventurous manner for me. I went to Sidikalang, about 6 hours away from Medan to attend a Batak wedding. I arrived in Medan and joined the rest of the team, squeezing into a single vehicle. Imagine a Toyata Unser which is Kijang, in Indonesia, capable of transporting 7 passengers. There were 9 of us in our journey to Sidikalang and 10 of us in our journey from Sidikalang. But it was fun throughout the journey. I had very fun travel companions. Besides Lita, I was the only other Malaysia and there were 2 ang mo kao from USA. The rest were locals who proudly showed us their scenic country. We stopped at Parapat, a highland tourist spot with a spectacular waterfall next to the beautiful Lake Toba. Then we had a Batak lunch in Berastagi. It was 9 hours after leaving Medan before we reach Sidikalang. Even after the stop at a strawberry farm and plucking strawberries from the trees and sinking our teeth into those juicy, red fruits. A few of us decided to go sight-seeing early the next morning. (Lita was the bridesmaid who had to go to the salon at 4am in the morning with the bride). There was a hill park in this small village that housed sections of religious history. There were a section depicting the history of Buddha, Hindu, Islam, and Christianity. We explored the Christian section. It was truly amazing. There were huge statues erected to depict Biblical events, starting from Abraham sacrificing Isaac, and ends with the resurrection. At each station, there were plagues to describe the events of the Bible that was displayed. The nativity scene was simply spectacular. The crucifixion was awesome. There were prayer huts erected at certain stations also.

I had the intention of taking many, many pictures of our friends’ wedding. But I ended up taking more scenic pictures instead! The Batak wedding was quite an experience. I enjoyed it. It was held in a Lutheran Haka Bepe Church and we proceeded to another church where the kenduri was held at the community hall. It was loud with blasting music and lively rituals.

We started our journey from Sidikalang, back to Medan in the afternoon after the lunch kenduri. Again we stopped at Berastagi for dinner. It was a fantastic place, similar to our Cameron Highlands. It was about 11pm before we reach Medan and we just dropped dead on our beds. The next morning, we explored Medan and I was able to source 2 books for my class. Later in the afternoon, we visited a friend in Sukaramai, about 45 minutes from Medan town center. Again, we were served with local Batak dishes for dinner. The next morning I took a cab to the airport to return home and that was when I encountered an accident. The cab driver applied an emergency brake to prevent hitting 2 motorcyclists in front of him at a red light and another motorcyclist came to hit him at the back. It was pretty scary because a fierce looking man came from nowhere and started screaming and scolding the cab driver as if he was ready punch him in the face. But thank God, the fury subsided when the traffic lights turned green and the cars starting moving.

Just a few short days to catch my breath and I hopped on the flight again to Tawau. Arriving late, about 8.30pm, the student greeting me at the airport with her husband and child, drove me straight into the jungle. But I had a fantastic dinner with a simple yet delicious prawns dish and pork soup. The Sunday morning service was at the Kiulu Baru Baptist Church, located in the heart of palm oil estates, in the midst of what seemed like some jungle. I got a taste of rural ministry. I joined the team for a typical Sunday. Early morning was service in the church followed by brunch prepared by church members. Now, this time it was Dusun dishes. Simple jungle food. Then later in the afternoon there was another service held at one of the members’ house. (They rotate the location among the church members). It was at another palm oil estate. The team arrived in 3 cars (2 pick-up trucks and one kancil) and we walked 20 minutes into the thick jungle, no I’m just exaggerating…it was just palm oil trees left and right.

It was an exciting class that I taught. I taught Cultural Anthropology and the class was represented by various people groups, some of which I’ve never heard of before. There were the Murut-Serudung, Murut-Kalabakan, Dusun, Orang Sungai, Iban, Filipin, Toraja, Rungus, and Tombunuo. And of course several in-betweens. They eagerly shared their traditional cultures and worldview. There was a story someone told the class of an isolated people group. They were so isolated that during war times, food was hardly available. So, what these people did was at each morning after they passed motion, they brought their excrement to the river to wash it. Whatever solid that was left were eaten. Another story was a testimony from one of the students. He went to visit another people group and was served dinner. How was the dinner prepared? A deer was caught and it was cut opened. The inside, stomach and all were thrown into a pot of boiling water (without being cleaned first) and it was served! This student testified that he almost vomited eating that and when someone accidentally tore the stomach, the soup was smeared with the stomach content and they still had to eat it. There was also the story of how the ancestors of a student from the Philippines who were brave warriors and during war times with their enemy, they would slaughter their enemy, cut off their ear, and ate it raw. It was pretty scary being in a class who are descendants of such fierce cannibalistic people. One proudly shared that his people group defended the town of Pitas from the invading Japanese army during WWII. In fact, Pitas was the only town in Sabah that the Japanese could not enter because the inhabitants not only killed the Japanese soldiers but they slaughter them, cutting of their heads but left one survivor to bring the story back, also to bring more Japanese soldier so that they have more people to slaughter. Then there was the worldview of the Dusun people who believed that men came from the spirits of Mount Kinabalu and when he dies, his spirit returns to Mount Kinabalu. But one young chap says that Mount Kinabalu has shrunk in its height these days. Reason being that more Dusun have become Christians and when they die, they go to heaven and not back to Mount Kinabalu

I hope the students learnt something from me. But I certainly learnt a lot from them. They treated me very kindly and were often afraid that I might go hungry. So, they were feeding me endlessly. We had a barbeque in the middle of the week. It looks like it might become a tradition here during my visits. There was another home service held on Thursday night. Similar to our CG. It was then that I bite into a delicious kampong biscuit and my tooth filling cracked. I could feel the sharp pain but it was brief. The next morning after breakfast, the whole filling came off Aise…visited the dentist again

I had a fun and exciting time in Tawau, or rather Kiulu Baru. I only went to Tawau on Friday afternoon after class. I was accommodated at the guest quarters of Tawau Baptist Church and wanted so much to spend some time for a lazy afternoon nap. After all, the cock crows at 5am in the kampong and refused to stop until I got up from bed. I really wanted to slaughter that particular rooster. It always crow below the window in my room and refused to stop crowing until I got up from bed! Anyway, I could not take a restful nap that Friday afternoon. SMS came, followed by a phone call, followed by a knock on the door…and there goes my plan to snore the day away. We went to town for dinner. It was pretty late but after dinner, we went window shopping, just jalan-jalan in the newly opened Eastern Plaza. Well, I heard that when Giant first opened its doors in late October last year, the whole town of Tawau flocked to the hypermarket and traffic jams lasted the whole week

I came back to Penang, dreadfully. The past two weeks were filled with adventure and coming back to the routine was a bore. But I sat for my entrance exam into the PhD (Missiology) program and I passed! It is especially significant for me because I have never been a good student in school. To have come thus far is a testimony of God’s grace and God’s goodness. It will be the last (official) exam that I have to take for the rest of my (formal) education life! Throughout my first year will be guided study, the next year is preparing the research prospectus, and the final year is writing the dissertation. Hopefully I complete it on schedule.

This Saturday I will be preaching at BJAC and CNY will arrive. There will be ang pao collecting sessions and hopefully some lazing around, some eating, and some (unofficial) working. I will be assisting FGAC BM church to teach their pastoral team. It will be something like one morning in each month. But it still needs preparations. It will be challenging to teach in a different context and I am very looking forward to it. There is another preaching engagement on 8^th Feb at JCMC and I may just stay away from going to town that weekend, which is the Thaipusam weekend.

Finally, a very King Xi Fa Chai to all of you and thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update: January 2009

2009-01-02T10:46:00.000+08:00

A very blessed new year to all of you, partners in ministry. 2008 came and went so swiftly. I do not know how the year had been for you, but for me it was a (spiritually) turbulent season. I felt pushed so far to the edge of giving up in ministry and even active Christian living. It seemed tempting to just lead a normal nominal Christian life and indulge in worldliness just like everyone else. After all, what is the difference between secular work and the Christian vocation? I have discovered that there is none.

December was a lazy month. Festivities and holidays filled the air. It was difficult having to discipline myself to focus on preparing my entrance exam which I plan to sit on the 3^rd week of this month. Besides the festivities, were a special wedding between Nix and ST. Attending the auspicious occasion, I met friends from Christ Church. Some of whom I have not seen since the day I left the pastoral ministry in Christ Church. I had so much fun at the “helium-gas inhaling” session. And wow! All the “kids” I knew from youth ministry – they are all grown up! Some tried standing close to me just to prove they have grown! There’s one of them who still remembers well that the phrase “Good things come in small packages” is found in Psalm 151! (I taught them that) Ha…those were the days. When I came home, I had a strange feeling. Never thought I’ll ever experience it but it felt like I missed pastoral ministry. I missed the “closeness” of fellowship with church members and ministering in a wider (church) context. And especially so during festive occasions when pastors “usually” need to play an active role. After about 4 years break from this ministry, it is strange. Perhaps it has been the way the Lord had been dealing with me these past couple of years. And I can boldly claim that I am a more mature Christian today than I was at the beginning of last year.

Before new year’s eve I was invited to visit a friend, someone who used to be a member of the Young Adult’s Ministry in Christ Church. She tried to surprise me but her constant invites (through sms) to visit her at home raised some suspicion and I rightly guessed it that she wanted me to see her 3 month old baby. Though the visit was brief, it was a great time to catch up on each other and to encourage each other as we share stories of how God had been faithful to us.

I know I should be actively serving in a local church and I want to be able to actively serve in my home church. However, the nature of my ministry just cannot afford that. I cannot commit a regular attendance and I have to be available to go here and there. Although this is my “wish” – to be serving the local church (while ministering to the universal church), I realized that as I looked back at 2008, hey, I’ve been doing that. It just did not fit my perspective of serving the local church but I’ve been ministering through the teaching and preaching ministry. And that is my gift and I was using it to worship God through the local church. I saw myself ministering in churches of various denominations in the urban and rural contexts, in the English and BM congregations.

I also realized I have become more “relational.” I mean, I was a person who was so task-oriented and result-oriented that I often disregard the people in between while focusing on accomplishing a quality result as a worship to a great God. So, why on earth did I ever take the trouble to plan a trip, all the way to Medan, just to attend a friend’s wedding? I could have save the trouble and the money to buy myself a new laptop computer. I remember that when I was working in the corporate sector, one colleague said to me that it is very “profitable” to invite SB Tan to weddings and dinners because she will just give an ang pao and never showed up. She was right. I never liked mingling with people and be in a crowd. I always felt I am able to do anything on my own and I do not need anyone at all. So, why bother to “waste” time in chatting with people when there could be a thousand other things to be done, when I could research all that I needed to know from books and magazines. I would not even bother to cross the bridge to attend a dinner but today I am a person who is taking the initiative to travel to another country solely for the purpose of attending a friend’s wedding. What a change the Lord had done in me! I have even taken the initiative to sms greetings to almost everyone in my phone book. I email little messages of encouragement to friends and partners in ministry in other parts of the world. And I can even just take time off to just sit and chat with friends for no apparent purpose. Even offering to pay the bill for lunch without thinking about exceeding my monthly budget, or treating a whole class to a bbq. Or, loaning money to a friend who needed an advance for his home rental deposit. Also, giving little gifts along the way. This is really not me and I am not sure what I have become. But that is not important. Because all I want is to be molded in the hands of my skillful Master and simply surrender to Him and allowing Him to mold a character in me that is worthy for the task He ordained for me.

I’m traveling to Medan tomorrow by Firefly and joining Lita and friends in a 5-hour drive to Sidikalang to attend a wedding. I was told Sidikalang is a small town and it’s pretty cold there. We will spend the weekend there before the wedding on Monday, conducted in traditional Batak customs. We travel back to Medan on Tuesday and I will travel back to Penang on Wednesday. I only have 2 days in the week before packing again to Tawau, Sabah for a week long of classes teaching Cultural Anthropology in BM. Well, Anthropology is a special subject. I mean, I am a major in Anthropology and Sociology in my first degree. But I failed to fully comprehend what Anthropology really is until a couple of years back! Returning from Sabah, I have my only full week at work and in Penang, 3^rd week of the month, which is when I hope to be ready enough to sit for my entrance exam (please, please pray for me – it will be the last exam I will be sitting for (hopefully) in my formal educational life. The PhD program is fully research-based and the final grading is an oral defense). I think I have a preaching engagement the weekend before CNY which will come at the last week of January and I’ll be traveling to PJ on the second day of CNY. Hopefully I get to meet some old friends around KL/PJ.

In case I can’t find the opportunity to write you again, a very Kong Xi Fa Cai to everyone and once again my signature log off line: Thank you for your partnership in ministry.

^{PHP 1:3} I thank my God every time I remember you. ⁴ In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy ⁵ because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, ⁶ being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Reflection & Projection

2008-12-17T12:52:00.002+08:00

I remember entering 2008 with fear. And I do not know fear of what. But as the year progressed, I realized it was an attempt of the enemy to prevent me from entering into a new spiritual dimension. During those fearful days, I was confronted with several issues. I was pushed to the edge of giving up on ministry & return to “normal” life (of nominal Christianity). I had to confront the difficult question that if my health failed, will I still love God? And 2008 is the year I entered the big 4-0. It is a phase where (bodily) machinery begins breaking down. I used to hear stories of failing health about my friends’ parents, but I have reached the stage where the stories come from my friends themselves. I hardly receive wedding invitations from friends these days. Instead, I receive wedding invitations of my friends’ children. Somehow the big number 40 bears some significance in regard to an entry to the next phase of life.

I was also pushed further to confront the question, if God calls me home at this instant, will I drop everything & return to Him? Like most devoted Christians, I know how I should respond and many times over I have mentioned the sentiment we all share. The head has all the answers but the heart often refuse to comply. I want to be able to declare to the Lord that, yes, I will leave everything & answer Your call, whatever it may be. Yet, I know that will not be an honest answer because I have grown pretty attached to work/ministry and family. I have grown too attached to worldly affairs. It was a troubling first quarter of 2008 that I went through. And I finally had to confess in all honesty to the Lord that I cannot sincerely respond in a manner I should and asked Him to help me love Him so much that I am able to sincerely & honestly be the vessel worthy for His use. It was a simple enough confession but it brought great relief. I began to rejoice that I’ve done the 40 years of wilderness and have entered into the promised land.

I believe the Lord take me through many circumstances in order to mold a character worthy for the task He ordained for me. He brought people into my life that has strong impact & significance. Simple things happen as if by chance but it has been ordained by the Lord. I met Rev. Laura Rizzo through the net. Although she is half way across the globe, she has been a great encouragement to me through some very difficult times. If anyone of you is familiar with the 5 Love Languages, well, my love language is word of encouragement & Rev. Laura has a tremendous Barnabas anointing & I often read her emails more than once. It never fails to lift me up. I thank the Lord for this unique partnership in ministry; that while we are miles apart, the love of Christ brings us near.

I have completed a full 8 years in the “official” full-time Christian ministry. And what I have discovered is that there is no difference between the secular and the so-called Christian vocation. Perhaps, because we are fallen human beings. But being Christians, we often expect our fellow believers to respond appropriately Christian. When that did not happen, it affects us negatively. Let me briefly list some “defense” to my statement on why I think there is no difference between the secular vocation & the Christian vocation:

1. There was a major complaint about one individual who clearly cannot perform in the capacity entrusted to him and the complaint was made to the very top authority but instead of considering the voice of the people (affected), more was entrusted to this individual within the capacity that he clearly cannot perform. Later it was discovered that this individual made a huge donation to the Christian organization. Doesn’t it look like “buying a job”?

2. A senior Christian minister insisting that Christian ministers must be able to plan what he/she wants to be/do in 5 year’s time. Does that sound like secularism here, leaving God & prayer out of the picture and become “I” & “me” centered instead? New Age Christianity, perhaps? In fact this person can actually make a statement like, “I will make sure this person never have the chance to serve in this organization.” What was the “crime” of “this person”? Simply being from another denomination & was in some disagreement with his peers. And this so-called senior Christian minister wanted to prevent “this person” from entering another denomination (?!?...that appeared in my thoughts too)

3. A senior Christian minister promising this & that, apparently, to gain respect/popularity but never keeps his word. Utterly untrustworthy.

4. A senior Christian minister who cringed and started to pacify a foreigner who just needs to raise his voice to get things his way

5. A foreigner who never prepares her work and complaints come from affected people, locally & overseas. Claiming to be a missionary? Looks more like a long-term tourist

6. A foreigner who is so obsessed with a title that he never bothers to know anything else other than securing a title. I thought ministry is about effectiveness, not titles & positions. Recently I discovered that those foreigners coming in to serve here are actually working in “lowly” jobs back home. They were grave-diggers, dish-washers and came here, often “berlagak” around because there are still Asians who actually idolize westerners. No, I’m not suggesting that we look down on foreigners. Instead, I’m implying the need for the Christian community to actually treat each other equally, just like what the Bible has been teaching all these while. Unfortunately, some people just can’t get out of their inferiority complex and become obsessed with the need to have a title to “feel” secure

7. A colleague lacking integrity. While we should not be calculative in service, better be careful or people may just take advantage of us. I learnt that the hard way. I obliged a colleague to do her job as she claimed to be busy with year-end tasks but when the reason expired she refused to take back the job

I think I can go on, and on, and on. I often asked myself if it’s worth it. I often face the temptation to return to secular vocation. After all, the pay is better, there is more recognition, even better career advancement. But I am here in a Christian vocation where age & gender are two factors of apparent prejudice. Within the Christian community, I wonder how much Christian values do we actually practice? I mean, we talk and teach about accountability, we talk and teach about team ministry, we even talk and teach about self-theologizing. But I seem to look at all these as mere hypocrisy of the Christian community. We expect people around to kow-tow to us without any objection or criticism. Anyone daring to swim against the tide is often seen as being the devil’s weapon. Some went to the extent that criticizing the (Christian) authorities is tantamount to being “demon-possessed” and “faithful Christians” should cast the “devil” out of that person. I know there are many “dissatisfactions” beneath the Christian masks. We just didn’t want to say it. Because once we say it, we will be penalized. We will be that black-sheep, the devil’s advocate, & should be thrown into the “cold storage” of ministry. We treat the brave Christian as an out-cast when the only “mistake” is simply to speak the truth. So, what is the difference? In fact, if a non-believer hurts you, you can accept it easier than if a believer hurts you because you know the former is ignorant of the Bible truth. But it hurts much deeper & it’s harder to forgive a fellow believer who should have known better. Yeah, sure…we use the excuse that we are all sinners. Granted. But let’s be honest to ourselves. It still affects us, one way or the other.

During my “pastoral” years when there was a lack of leadership in the church I was serving, I spent a great amount of time reading & studying about leadership. I read almost all of John Maxwell’s books & can conclude that once you read 3 of his books, you’ll be familiar with his leadership principles. His other books only elaborate various points of the principles. I remember he wrote that everything rise and fall on leadership. And that is true. Sad to say, we lack strong spiritual leadership in the Church. We need men & women who can fearlessly champion Christian values to restore a Christian community that God can be pleased with. We need men & women leaders who dare to stand for Christ even if it means standing alone. We need men & women leaders who dare to be different even if it challenges tradition. We need men & women leaders who are bold enough to be radical just as Jesus Himself was in His time. The Church needs to take charge because what we are will be manifested in the community around us. We need to take the lead to be change agents. And somehow we wonder why the ethnic community leaders are yes-men in the BN coalition government!

I remember the very first leadership principle I learnt. It came from the principal of our residential college in University Malaya. Prof. Madya Dr Haji Wan Abu Bakar Wan Abbas was the dean of the engineering faculty, located next to our Second (Residential) College. It was during one of the “taklimat Pengetua” that he told us how he was approached by his colleagues asking how he could manage his team. His reply was “to recognize authority.” I have carried this principle and it has never failed me. Recognizing authority is to recognize the person in charge of each specific responsibility. Even if I am “above” a person (in the authority hierarchy) I must respect the authority given to the person that has been entrusted to be in charge. If I am a school principal, I no doubt have the authority over the running of the entire school and can over-ride any decisions. However, recognizing authority is to submit myself, even as a principal, to say, the head of the Physical Education department because this person is better acquainted with the daily running/needs of the department & this person’s advise/decision will definitely be better/more practical/useful.

I think what the church needs is recognition of authority & mutual submission. As the Bible tells us, we need to tell the truth in love (Eph 4:15). We should be able to criticize each other in love and should be able to accept criticism in love.

I love ministry. I enjoy ministry. But I just dislike serving in this seminary. It seems to look like the most unchristian place, yet, it is supposed to churn out church leaders! In many ways, I think we still have a lot to learn. Yet, in no way, should we compromise on the quality of service we offer through the training/discipleship ministry. There’s always the excuse that we are fallen beings and we need to look beyond the fault of our fellow believers. This is true, but it does not mean I cannot be affected by what I experienced & encountered. After all, I am a fallen being myself. I was in the CG recently & was asked to share on something along the line of whether I was ever angry at God. I was reluctant because it involve my colleagues and I know it does no good to paint a bad picture of our Christian leaders that my CG members can easily decipher through any “cover-up” I may attempt. Besides I express myself better through writing, rather than talking. That is why I spend more time writing than speaking when preparing a sermon.

I would say that 2008 carried me through the furthest to the edge of giving up. Yet, the Lord always brings the right people to say the right things at the right moment until I realize, I was made to love Him, to serve Him, to praise Him. I confess that sometimes I just want to hurt others in the same way I’ve been hurt. I mean, let them get a taste of how it feels like: to be hurt, to be treated unfairly, and all these within the Christian community? Can there be any hope for the Church? Shouldn’t the Church be the one championing equality, righteousness, and justice? Instead, worldliness overtakes as men selfishly claim the limelight to feel “good” for themselves.

Entering into 2009, I have no idea what is in store. The Lord has prepared me to trust Him more and I’m walking the talk of trusting Him. I am still preparing for my entrance exam into the PhD (Missiology) program. I target to sit for the exam by January 2009. And I still have no idea how to finance myself through this program except a faith to believe that the God who calls, will provide. Do I have enough in my life savings to sponsor myself through my studies? The truth is, yes I do. But enough to pay for the fees without knowing how much the field research is going to cost. And I have to pick an original research! This means I have to actually go to the field to collect raw data.

I often silently wish that the Lord would just call me to serve in a small, closely-knitted church community. That I can just lead a simple, uncomplicated ministry. But I know with certainty, that is not what the Lord called me to do. In fact, resignation to that will amount to retirement from ministry. No, the Lord wants me to serve the universal church and not the local church. It is a macro ministry, not a micro ministry and it finely fits my macro perspective that seems tailor-made just for this. I always feel the need to balance church involvement and the teaching ministry. I know I need to be more involved in church activities. Somehow, things just don’t turn up as it should. I want to just serve in my home church & continue ministry in the seminary. But, the Lord had prepared for me to serve various churches all through the nation while serving in the seminary. This has actually opened my eyes to the wider needs within various church denominations & the emerging new generation of church leaders who are non-denominational in perspective.

I have a dream. Just like Martin Luther King who had a dream for the US. I dream towards the day that Christians can treat each other equally just like being prescribed in the Bible. I have a dream for the BM ministry. I dream for the BM department to realize their potentials, to be recognized as an equal to the other streams, because they are just as good as anyone else. Regardless of whether I witness the fulfillment of the dream, I pray for it to be shared by all involved and all who carry the passion for this work. The Christian ministry is a journey that we each participate to play a role in time. And the Lord will ordain the right person to harvest the fruit at the fullness of time. I believe true satisfaction is fulfilling the job entrusted to us, to do the best as an honor to God, and leave it to Him to reward us accordingly. And it should not matter whether we are privileged to witness/enjoy the fruit of our labor.

Another year is fast approaching. I am praying that our good Lord will continue to strengthen each of us to face the challenges ahead. 2009 will be a difficult year with the recession coming along. But let’s be reminded that our Father who owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Ps 50:10), will surely see us through sufficiently.

I have enjoyed the mission trips along the year. There were short trips with students of the seminary from the BM department. We visited Perlis in northern Malaysia in April and to an urban OA church in KL last October. The amazing thing about these trips was that we were on shoe-string budgets. And surprisingly, we always ended up with excess cash! I really have no idea how those money just appeared! There was a longer trip to North Sumatera last July. I don’t know if it can be categorized as a “mission trip” but my teaching assignments in both Tawau & Kuching were filled with “mission trip encounters.” Then there was the over-the-weekend trip to the OA villages with my CG recently. I was very happy to discover from the pastor there that they are beginning to see the need to train/disciple lay leaders and looking further to prepare the next generation of church leaders. But the one thing that most impressed me was their desire to be local. I do not want to sound like I’m against foreign missionaries or their efforts here. But it is just mere facts that they often cause more harm than good to the local ministry & it is the local church that has to do the “cleaning up” job. Generally, I strongly believe – God establish His church in Malaysia for Malaysians. And that is our primary duty.

I’d like to thank all of you, my partners in ministry. Some of you taking the trouble to read many long blog entries and some (like me) who only skim through long emails. Thank you for reading my ministry journals, detailing my spiritual walk and pilgrimage. I hope my honest expressions reveal to you a very human perspective of a fallen, sinful being who strive to live and minister only and solely by God’s terms. Even with the many degree certificates that I have with my name printed on it, I face as much challenges as anyone of us in this fallen world. It is a struggle to be a faithful Christian in a fallen world. Sometimes, the Christian community itself is no help. Yet, at other times, you cannot survive without the support of the Christian community. And I am accountable to all of you, in GBC, in Christ Church, and elsewhere where our paths once met, as we partner each other to make a difference for our nation in this generation. Please remember me in your prayers as we pray for each other to be effective witnesses for our Lord.

meet me here

2008-12-04T16:36:00.000+08:00

Ministry Update: December 2008

2008-12-03T08:56:00.000+08:00

This will probably be the final entry for the year 2008. It's amazing how one whole year whizzed by so swiftly. Nothing eventful occurred recently. Well, last week was a colleague's wedding in Alor Star and the staff took a break to Langkawi for a retreat. But I was in Penang through the weekend. Loaded with some family chores that needed my attention. Next week, I'm taking my break for a whole week, beginning with a short, over-the weekend trip to the OA settlement in central Malaysia with my CG members. Then I'm travelling to PJ for the week to spend time with my nephews, Jack & James. James will be turning 3 middle of the month.

Right now, I'm juggling two tasks. One, is preparing for the class in Tawau from 12-16Jan. Two, is preparing for my entrance exam into the PhD Missiology program. Honestly, I do not know how to finance myself through this program. I'm simply stepping out in faith. And I want to pursue this because I know I can achieve only as far as I dare to dream and I can only take the people I lead to where I've been.

I'm not sure what 2009 has in store, especially with the uncertainty clouding almost every facet of our lives. But I'll be looking forward to spending a whole month (Apr/May) in Tawau, teaching at PLAB (Pusat Latihan Alkitab Baptis) where we've initiated a "twinning" program. I hope to visit various ministries of our students and to encourage the work in the interior. I'm free (from teaching) throughout the BM Module in STCM next year. This will give me more time to spend with the students in various activities. Most of all is, I'm looking forward to the new work among the Semai people in central Malaysia. I'll share more as the work progresses but as for now, it's at its very infant stage.

At the close of the academic year, someone asked me how I cope with students leaving after a year or two in campus. I'm actually very ok with that. In fact, I think it'll trouble me if I see a person continously, endlessly...I mean, students come and students go. And I have built friendships with many nationalities. I have invites to various places throughout Asia and beyond: there's invites to Thailand, Myanmar, Cambodia, China, Hong Kong, Sudan, Nepal, Indonesia, Singapore. Unfortunately my invitation to South Korea is no longer valid as my Korean brother & family is now in Malaysia (?!) And within Malaysia, of course there's invites to almost every state, except Kelantan/Trengganu.

Before I close, I'd like to send you my warmest Christmas & New Year greetings to you and your family. And again I'd like to thank all of you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update: Nov 2008

2008-11-11T09:28:00.000+08:00

Time sure passes by fast. I thought we were just preparing for Christmas but suddenly, here we go again! It won't be long before most people will look back at the year that was to evaluate before preparing new year resolutions.

I'm preparing for my entrance exam into the PhD (Missiology) program. It's kind of slow. Most drivers will agree that when we slow down acceleration, our car pick up is faster than when we arrive at a complete stop. For the past year or so, I've been preparing lessons and grading student assignments/tests, thus, to accelerate into full gear to study...it's slow. Please pray for me. I really have no idea how the funds are coming in. The school is not supportive of my studies. They quote this & that policy but reading between the lines, they are simply trying to tell me, "you're not a man!" But the hiccup will not stop me. In fact, I'm still believing in God who has called me & invited me to enter into a big, huge dream of ministry possibilities. And because I know my God is a big God, I will keep dreaming big. After all, we can achieve only as far as we dare to dream. And why I'm bothering to go further academically, it's because I know I can only raise those I teach up to where I am. I believe them to be so full of potential, they can arrive at the furthest possible. It's just like when God sacrificed His Son for me. Though I was a sinner, a wretched sinner with no hope, He believed in me. In a similar way, I want to believe my fellow brothers and sisters that they can be all they can be in Christ our Lord.

Who in their reasonable, logical mind could ever dream that someone who failed almost all subjects in school could enter university? It was already beyond my wildest dream that a terrible student in school like me can enter a prestigious university in Malaysia but the Lord took me further. I could still remember the day I walked beside the man-made Tasek Universiti in UM campus. I could still remember the still, soft voice that spoke firmly into my heart to pusue a master degree. I could still remember my fear at that moment. Hey, who wouldn't? If you know yourself as someone who barely pass all public exams, and even university exams. But I could still vividly recall that afternoon walk beside Tasek Universiti during my first year in campus. It's already a miracle in itself that the Lord took me to university. And truly, it is beyond my wildest dream that I can possess an honors bachelor and three master degrees & am now preparing to enter the PhD program. I can really testify of how good and faithful God truly is. He provides and provides the best. And I can keep dreaming big for a big God.

It's convocation week this week. The academic year is winding up and soon there'll be a new year approaching.

Ministry-wise, things are progressing well. I'm very excited when told of a new OA work developing among churches of various denominations. Main line churches are involved with a renewed interest following a change of leading heads. Please pray for this effort. I can't reveal much right now but it looks like the past years, the Lord has called His people in various capacities & raising them for a purpose and for a time such as now. The pieces are still fragmented but I believe they are slowly falling into place. Please pray for this new emerging ministry. It is 100% effort of the Malaysian church.

November is not as exciting as October or maybe December. But it is a busy month for the school here as we wrap up the academic year. December is usually a month of rest before the Christmas season approaches. I almost have a vacation planned. Well, I'm not someone who enjoys a holiday. I can only do "working holidays" but this was an attempt. However, my friend from Hong Kong encountered some complications with the immigration & has to return by late November. So, the holiday was cancelled. Perhaps, that's God's way of telling me that I need to focus on preparing my entrance exam & spend more time with the family instead. (Maybe the savings can afford me a new laptop! Yay me!) Once again, I thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update: October 2008

2008-10-27T15:31:00.000+08:00

There seems to be something special about first loves. That was revealed to me during my first visit to the Land Below the Wind. I had so much fun in Sabah. Being an urban freak, my first kampong adventure was spectacular. It was perhaps what people call “love at first sight” experience. The hospitality was simply out of this world. I was treated so well, I felt so undeserving & unworthy. I’ve been to Sarawak several times. Perhaps I should begin exploring its vast interior. Instead, the teaching center was located in the very heart of the city itself. Regardless, it was also a week of mutual learning. I tasted python meat in Tawau, I tasted fox (musang) meat in Sarawak. What an adventure, right?!

When I landed in Kota Kinabalu, I met Michelle & we went to lunch with a few of her friends. I quickly discovered that food servings in East Malaysia come in XXL portions. I stayed with her a night & met her house mates. It’s comforting to know that this young lady who hails from the Eagles (Youth Ministry) in Christ Church, is today an active leader, probably a strong pillar of Hope Church in KK. I was brought to eat seafood & got the first taste of the famous Sabah seafood. The prawns were XL sized. The next day I flew to Tawau. Two of my students were planning to take me round town and they decided to take me to a special place – the jungle! So we visited Taman Bukit Tawau. Tawau must be real small because at every where we went someone knew them. So, we entered the park for free. Dinner was seafood in Tawau town. The prawns were XXL sized. We walked half the town of Tawau in a single night & at every destination, my host met a friend. Shows how popular a pastor is, in a small town & there’s no way you can have even a little privacy! The following day I preached at the BM congregation of Tawau Baptist Church. Then later in the day we went to the school in Kiulu Baru. It was about 40 minutes from town, in the midst of palm oil estates.

For over 30 years I live in big cities and it was my very first kampong adventure. Sunrise is at 5am and bedtime is easily after dinner at 7pm. Night life, as we know it in big cities, is non existence; except perhaps for church meetings. (Gives us an understanding why rural families are big!) It didn’t take long for me to blend in to the kampong way of life. I surprised myself greatly. After all, my only other kampong adventure is during mission trips into the interior but hardly stayed for more than a night or two in a kampong. But I easily adapted for a whole week. On top of that, I had such great fun. Roosters crow, playing the role of nature’s alarm clock. Only that we cannot reset its wake-up call, nor disable its chime function. On my first night in the kampong, I heard the rooster crow and thought it was already morning. But I looked at my watch & it was just 11.45pm. Apparently roosters crow at every hour! Our only option is to catch the rooster & slaughter it for barbeque! There’s even the luxury of a fish spa where little fishes nibble at your toes in the shallow rivers nearby.

One of the students from Kalabakan brought huge prawns. I was told Kalabakan is famous for its prawns. And it’s XXXL sized prawns that we had for almost everyday! I met with Carmilita after the week of class, back in Tawau. She treated me to dinner – seafood again. This time besides the prawns, were crabs! I met her aunt & cousin; her cousin is so, so funny…

I had to travel back to KK to catch a flight to Kuching & it was a 5-hour wait in KK airport. I lost count of my strolling up & down the small airport. Even kill time by watching Hindi movie! That was after grading one student’s assignment that seemed like a novel script! I reached Kuching & was met by Seria. Oh ya…both Daniel & Seria sent their regards to everyone in GBC & Christ Church (they still remember Su Theng & Uncle Charles). The first dish to indulge in Kuching – you guessed it! Sarawak laksa! I also had a good time in Kuching; especially discovering rojak kucei. Next visit, must go there!!! Well, it’s something like gado-gado/pasembur.

I learnt from the students as much as they learnt from me. While I can offer them intellectual/academic lessons, they taught me lessons in simplicity, love (for God/ministry), and inter-personal relations. I remember at one discussion when we brought up the issue of gender. Most of us are aware that eastern cultures are male-dominated. But in every culture, respect is earned. The Baptist churches in both Sabah/Sarawak have no problem accepting lady pastors/leaders. I shared with the students that I’ve baptized, conducted holy communion, preached at almost every church context but I’ve never stood behind the pulpit of the conservative Baptist church I belong to. The class (in Sabah & in Sarawak) was quick to invite me to move to East Malaysia! Maybe I should consider this?!

Several incidents brought deep impact upon my life & ministry. The significant incident in Sabah was in the context of discussion with a student regarding the students’ academic progress and this statement came. Its equivalent in English is something along the line of the student’s expression of gratitude that I have taken a serious concern and care for the development of their studies because no one had shown such previously. In Sarawak, we were visiting a village and the local host was showing me with much pride their facilities. There’s a church built on a piece of land with several buildings for hostel, kitchen, hall, etc and vege/fruit plants all over the compound, with a nearby waterfall & river. However, they expressed disappointedly that their facility will not match the standard of the “missionaries” because there’s no access to modern facility like internet & even network reception is inconsistent. But one student gave this remark. Its English equivalent is an expression of gratitude because to them they hardly have teachers who are willing to live like them, with them (in the kampong environment).

Those little moments touched me deeply. I thought I was just fulfilling some responsibility & hope to do the best at what that has been entrusted to me. Little that I realize my little gesture had impacted the students. Suddenly, the problems I have in ministry diminished to the size of the smallest ant. I thank the Lord for the privilege He gave me to visit both Sabah & Sarawak. Mostly, I thanked the Lord for revealing to me the vast potential of these two places: both spiritual & physical. I failed to understand why no one has noticed this before along the years (from 2002) since the BM department was birthed. I’m in the process of forwarding several proposals to the higher management here (MBTS). This is a huge opportunity. There will be sacrifices & hard work. But for the Kingdom of God, it’ll be worth every single effort. May God help me.

Thank you for your partnership in ministry. Last weekend (25-26Oct) the MBTS BM team went to Shalom Fellowship, Sri Petaling in KL. It is an urban OA church. We had a great time there. I suppose it’s true for every trip, it’s not the destination but the people you travel with. For our team, we enjoy each other’s company, though I had to endure some loud & long snoring! I have to admit that the more I spend time with the BM stream students/tribal people groups, the Lord open my heart bigger and bigger to embrace them and I’m finding myself more and more at home among them. This has deepen my passion to champion their cause & do all within my ability to realize their vast potentials.

I also have a preaching engagement at Jelutong Chinese Methodist Church on 9Nov. No, I’m not preaching in Chinese. I’m preaching at the English service. Once again, thank you for your partnership in ministry.

SAYA ANAK BANGSA MALAYSIA

2008-09-25T08:40:00.000+08:00

I have never felt so patriotic in my life! I have never felt so proud to be a Malaysian. I believe we are right now at a spiritual cross-road to a breakthrough. Imagine, I can even break down & cry reading postings and comments on the Malaysia Today website! I have a desktop wallpaper of a SAYA ANAK BANGSA MALAYSIA poster here on my office computer. I am joining the fight to claim Malaysia back from corruption & evil. Maybe even going bald for RPK (?!) But I know I cannot afford to get too emotional. It is emotions that the enemy camp often use to incite undesireable responses.

Let's join the effort in praying to deliver Malaysia from evil...

Next week I'll be travelling to East Malaysia. Will be away for two weeks and probably will not be able to post any monthly updates till I return. Plz pray for the ministry. Preaching @ Tawau Baptist Church, teaching @ PLAB in Tawau, and teaching in Kuching. I'm looking forward to the exciting adventure. In the meantime, let's keep praying for the transformation of Malaysia.

SAYA ANAK BANGSA MALAYSIA !!!

Free Teresa, Abolish ISA! Petition

2008-09-15T16:49:00.000+08:00

Free Teresa, Abolish ISA! Petition

Ministry Update: September 2008

2008-09-04T12:04:00.001+08:00

Greetings from little me at a small corner on top of a hill over-looking the lush blue skies and green/muddy sea. Ministry has been an adventure. Many ups and downs. Yet He made all things beautiful in its own time. I am aware as many Malaysian Christians that we are entering or rather, in the midst of very crucial moments in our nation. There’s a bigger cause for the church, rather than the individual. All the more we should unite during these days of “birth pangs” to bring forth the birth of a re-newed nation.

I came back from the missions trip to North Sumatra a few weeks ago, but I may be going back there for a shorter period (about a week) in early December. It’s still semester break in campus now, so things are pretty slow moving (and lazy) until school reopens next Monday. There’s still obvious “situations” needing attention but often, things cannot be rushed. After the BM dept head left to return to the States last April/May, I was appointed to assume that role. However, an American missionary later came unexpectedly & demanded to be made the head of the BM dept (!?). For whatever reason, the School (president) submitted to that demand. (Perhaps to maintain the relationship of MBTS-IMB???) So, I had to sacrifice that position. Initially I was very upset. This person is not based in campus & only comes in half a day, twice a week and yet he demands to be called “director.” (??!!) But now, I feel sorry for him. Each time he sees me, he will talk about the “title.” I have no idea why he is so obsessed with the “title.” Doesn’t anyone ever tell him that ministry is not about titles and positions? Instead, it’s about how effective we are in ministry! If we cannot earn the respect and credibility of the people we work with, our ministry amounts to nothing! So how is the school management going to deal with this matter? They are pretty confused at the sudden change of events which upset the original plans but I was told they are working out job descriptions to clarify job boundaries.

I was at Bukit Mertajam Baptist Church together with some friends for the Merdeka Day Count-down Service. Jenny (Liew) & family, a Korean chap, a student from Hong Kong were there too. The pastor of the BM congregation is a student here & he is intending to hold this sort of service as an annual affair. There was an array of cultural display through traditional costume, songs, and dances; reflecting the diversity of Malaysia, united in Christ. An offering was collected as a contribution to the BM dept., MBTS. I’m so glad for the partnership of local churches, who are rising up to support the training of their leaders. Truly Malaysia belongs to Malaysians & the Malaysian church is the responsibility of Malaysian Christians.

This Sunday, I’ll be speaking at St Mark’s Church in Butterworth. Then I have some teaching sessions at a CG. But I can’t wait for October. End of last week I just realized my teaching assignments in East Malaysia is immediately after the Raya holidays. I have to get me tickets early & was glad I was able to secure a good deal. I travel on Friday to KK & meet up with Michelle. The next day travel to Tawau to spend the weekend with my students visiting their ministry/church. The following week I travel back to KK to catch a flight to Kuching for another week. There’ll be a weekend trip to KL the following week where the BM dept “troop” will visit an urban OA church. The date is still pending, so is my speaking engagement on the same weekend at BJAC (may have to swap with someone).

We are already in September. Soon we’ll be preparing for Christmas & welcoming a new year. I’m already starting to prepare my application to further my studies. In fact, just before I went to North Sumatra, I had the opportunity to meet my prospective research supervisor. If God willing and by His grace, I will pursue a study/research on leadership in a tribal group in Sabah or Sarawak

Once again, thank you for your partnership in ministry.

Ministry Update: August 2008

2008-08-20T11:09:00.000+08:00

So I'm back from the missions trip to North Sumatra. It sure was different from last year's trip. It's a different team with different dynamics. Apparent changes were seen in the field. Now back behind the desk facing the computer monitor, I'm faced with the obvious reality. Where is the Lord leading me? I want to be able to echo what the prophet Habbakuk wrote in Hab 3:17-18,

Hab 3:17 For though the fig-tree shall not flourish, Neither shall fruit be in the vines; The labor of the olive shall fail, And the fields shall yield no food; The flock shall be cut off from the fold, And there shall be no herd in the stalls:
Hab 3:18 Yet I will rejoice in Jehovah, I will joy in the God of my salvation.

it's difficult to be sincere and honest when considering the apparent "hypocrisy" around. We teach and stress so much on Asian theology and matters concerning self-theologizing, yet our conduct betray us. Secularism creeps into the church and we can only rationalize that we are fallen human beings! When is the "colonialization" of the church going to stop? I was appointed to head the BM Dept but suddenly one American missionary came & demand for that position, then the so-called school management bow to that demand. I am disillusioned with ministry. I really feel so pushed to the edge of giving up. What's the difference with the world if the church cannot champion truth within herself??? Again, we rationalize that we are fallen human being, confine to our limited limitations. If so, we are reducing the bigness of our God into a small match-box. We continue to be bias conforming to the traditional age and gender bias. There are areas in ministry strictly for specific gender - why? Where is our security? Can't we accept our strength & weakness and compliment each other to accomplish the task entrusted to us? Instead, each gender has to feel threatened to the extend of confining the other to their so-called specific roles. Policies, budget, etc were quoted to discourage me from furthering my studies, but the bottom-line I can discern is, I'm not a man.

The events from the start of the year seem to be like "birth pangs" and I don't know what it's leading to. I've encounter "attacks" and circumstances that seem to contradict what God is speaking to me. Sure I want to maintain the faith to declare like Habbakuk that I can still rejoice despite the circumstances, but I doubt my own sincerity in pronouncing them. At this moment and circumstances, I'm in a position of readiness to go to anywhere the Lord may call me to, at anytime He chooses. I suppose, this is how I should be at all times. But I've learnt not to hold dear anything I've been entrusted with: be it ministry, fellowship, etc. We are pilgrims here on earth with no permanence.

A reflection of uncertainty is seen at the larger aspect of Malaysia as a nation. Events each day are building up its intensity, much like "birth pangs" to a new era.

To anyone reading this blog entry - I am a single lady Christian minister encountering challenges as she strives to live and minister by God's terms. Right now, I'm at the very edge of giving up. Disillusioned, discouraged, disappointed. Yet knowing God is faithful and His Word NEVER return to Him void.

Ministry Update: July 2008

2008-07-01T07:30:00.000+08:00

Last Saturday I was preaching at a Saturday evening service. For the second time, I received the comment that I look more cheerful now that I’ve left the pastoral ministry! Is the pastoral ministry really that “miserable?” I suppose it’s the context of it. And the personality? I always tend to take “work” very seriously. Thus, each time I notice anything “less than Christian,” it grief me, upset me, disappoint me, etc…and I will feel miserable for weeks. At most times, the head knows how to respond but the heart just refuse to correspond appropriately. I’m still learning to accept that even within the Christian community, there are the “wheat & the weeds.” Each accountable to God & on that Day when we stand before the Great White Throne, judgment takes place. Because God is so gracious, He always gives an opportunity to repent.

Right now I’m serving in a Bible School. As if there are no heartaches? That’s mere fantasy! Ministry is full of ups and downs; joy and hurt; laughter and tears; yet He makes all things beautiful in its own time. Next week will see a busy time for the BM Dept. with over 40 students coming in for 4-weeks courses. Weekends are packed with activities besides weekdays evening programs. Being a task-oriented person, I’m obviously looking forward to be in the midst of bustling activities. After that, I only have a short weekend to pack before leaving for a 10-day trip to North Sumatra. After the mission trip, September seems slow paced before October; a week in Sabah, a week in Sarawak, and a weekend in KL. November will be pretty busy too with graduation preparations. This year, the BM Dept. is graduating her first batch of students. Started in 2002 on modular basis, the students have persevered through the years & 2 students are graduating this November!

Please join me to pray and dream for the BM department. I’m the only “full-timer” here while everyone else in our pool of teachers are part-timers: pastors & missionaries. Even the administrative help I have are students in campus. I am hoping to develop its potential. After all, it’s been sitting motionless for the past 5-6 years. My first step is to involve more locals & create an achievable progression for the OA community. I don’t know why God led me to this ministry. But I’ve discovered so much joy and fulfillment. These are simple people, eager to learn and in need of just a little attention & opportunity to rise up. And I’m glad I availed to God to be a vessel in accomplishing His purpose for these people. But truly, this is a very challenging ministry. Home missions is less “glamorous” than foreign missions, thus, too little attention has been given to this ministry that holds vast potential. Hey, you know the best candidates to reach our M friends? We are also publishing BM books. Christian books in Malay are often imported from Indonesia and they are in Bahasa Indonesia. While similar, we still need to contextualize into the Malaysian context. Our department has published 3 BM books thus far. I believe some of you have a few of them. Let me know if it’s helpful & if you can help us in translation/proof-reading works. We can’t pay you in dollars & cents but will surely credit your heavenly account!

But what am I up to these days? A few friends asked why they have not been receiving updates from me. I’m so sorry for that. It’s more convenient to just post it to my blog. And once in awhile, I send these updates. But for sure is I’m still learning to be a good minister in God’s kingdom. I discovered God gave me a prophetic gift and a close friend is teaching me to exercise it wisely. I’m still uncertain as to where and when I am able to go to “the field” as I have ambitiously plan big plans for the BM Dept. But I’m still praying for that opportunity. I’m still preparing for further studies; by God’s grace I hope to pursue missions research in the Asian context. After all, the Church (in Malaysia) ought to have matured to self-theologizing, and not merely “importing” western trends.

Join me in prayer. Again, I’m quoting Philippians 1:3 “I thank my God upon all my remembrance of you.”

This is my Father's world

2008-06-12T06:29:00.000+08:00

I really don't know if it is a good or bad thing that I tend to take ministry matters rather personally. After all, I rationalize that this is my Father's business. So, how can I not be upset when I notice how "unchristian" approaches are adopted into ministry? Is it right or wrong that I should be grieved at how worldliness has crept into the Christian community?

Since becoming a Christian, pastors/teachers taught me that the road to spiritual maturity is when we surrender more of self so that more of Christ will reign in our lives. When I was a pastor, I taught the church that life as a Christian require us to surrender our selfish rights and to allow God the full reign in us. As a preacher, I preach from the pulpit that we need to hunger for more of God in us. As a teacher, I teach students that Christ must be central to everything we do, hoping that my student pastors will teach the same thing to members of their church. I remember that shortly before I graduated with ThM, someone asked me what my plans are. I was asked what I have planned to see myself doing in 5 years time, in 10 years time. I insisted then that I will let the Lord lead me, I want to be in His will and to allow Him to have the final say in what I should do. Yet, the other person kept insisting to me that I must know/plan what I want to do in 5 years time, in 10 years time. As if it is not enough, a few weeks back another "senior Christian minister" asked me the same thing. "What do you see yourself doing in 5 years time, in 10 years time?" As if each of us must plan our lives, our ways. Isn't that the way of the world? I left that sort of lifestyle to be a Christian, then a Christian minister. I have surrendered my life to God and journeying towards a complete surrender so that God will fully reign in me & through me to accomplish His divine purpose on earth. But suddenly, I was told that I must be central to what I want to do. What happened? Isn't God the One who should be central? I suppose if I stop resisting and conform, life will definitely be easier. But my conscience tells me that I must not because the day will come when I stand before the Great White Throne, and I stand accountable for my own deeds. So, I may be a radical, a rebel to the "establishment" but I have decided to uphold my Christian principles. God is central & He will be central to everything I am/do.

Last Sunday the preacher in my home church was reminding us that it's pastors who "kill" churches when we preach incomplete truth. I agree to that. But more to that is that Christian leaders "murder" the church by adopting worldly standards to measure spirituality. It results in superficial Christianity that rob us of genuine worship. I pray that God will come to visit us here in Malaysia & to purify the church. Is it right that I pray for judgment to begin from the House of God to remove the "impurities" within the House? It's time to return to the foundation of our faith, something we seem to have forgotten. It's time to re-kindle that passion of first love for our God that seem to have deteriorate. It's time to restore a holy fear of God that seem to have diminish in our walk with God. I pray the church in Malaysia will awake from her spiritual slumber & understand the signs of the time & urgency of the day.

SB

Cyber Wonder

2008-06-03T06:20:00.001+08:00

Technology works wonders. It created a borderless world where we can reach people anywhere with a few quick clicks on our computer mouse. I praise God that He brought a wonderful acquiantance into my life by chance, in cyber space. Check out this cool site at Faith-Space.com

Dreaming Big for God...all alone

2008-05-29T07:03:00.000+08:00

Prophecies & dreams often give us the passion & hope to strive towards the fullness of what God has in store for us. I don't know how far or to what extent we should contribute towards the divine effort for the fulfillment of God's promises. Of a fact, if God promises we should not just sit & wait for it to drop from the sky. But on the other hand, we should not also be like Abraham who tried to help God fulfill his promise, where he ended up with his Ishmael.

I think the key is still spiritual discernment. A spiritual character cultivated and nurtured through time and intimacy. No, I really don't think all Christian have it. Also I do not think all Christian leaders have it! What a shame...

Here I stand, dreaming big for my God. But here I stand all alone. Yet my call is to stand firm for my God.

SB

Ministry Update

2008-05-06T11:28:00.000+08:00

Dear partners in ministry,

Thank you for your partnership in the ministry. Thank you that your friendship & fellowship has been a blessing to me. Some of you may be like me, who suddenly realized it's already the fifth month of 2008! I've been pretty relaxed lately, in fact, so relaxed since I completed my thesis in early September 2007 & I'm getting pretty bored. Thus, I really look forward to the coming STCM (School of Trans-Cultural Missions) which is just around the corner. There are many activities lined up: teaching, traveling, mission trips.

End of last month, I went on a field trip with the BM Dept to Perlis. It was the launch of our attempt in networking with the BM churches throughout Peninsular Malaysia. There will be many more such weekend field trips throughout the year & its frequency will increase next year. Besides that, STCM will also see several weekend field trips for the STCM/audit students. I was told we will have many students coming in from Singapore this year. Then the BM module in July - I already have an average of 40 students for the BM classes. This year the BM Dept will host the closing ceremony of STCM where the students are preparing to present East Malaysian cultures in dances, exhibitions, and even food!

It's going to be a busy time & I'm pretty excited to greet the next term. After the one-week teaching, I have a weekend to pack & travel to North Sumatra for a 10-day mission trip. The next interesting month will be October when i have a back-to-back teaching schedule in Tawau, then Kuching. And after returning, the following weekend is another weekend field trip.

End of November is a colleague's wedding in Alor Star followed by our staff retreat in Langkawi. Looks like later half of the year is more interesting than the slow moving first half. Well, I'm also getting my hands into two huge, challenging assignments (1) a new (BM) extension center & (2) upgrading of an extension center to a partner Bible school. I'm excited at how the Lord is moving in the BM ministry - both in MBTS & the BM churches across Malaysia. And truly, it is a privilege to partner the Lord in His work.

I look forward to continue my studies next year and also the opportunity for a longer missions exposure. Besides Indonesia, Phillipines is a new promising option to consider.

Finally, thank you for your partnership. Once again I'm quoting Phillipians 1:3
I thank my God every time I remember you
or
Aku mengucap syukur kepada Allahku setiap kali aku mengingat kamu

SB

Another Step Forward

2008-05-05T08:29:00.000+08:00

It's another new month and time seems to progress so fast, as if with a blink of an eye we are already entering the fifth month of the year. Although life still goes on despite the many changes around us, I believe many Malaysians are still abuzz with the change of our political landscape. I, for one, have suddenly embraced an interest in Malaysian politics, and a renewed hope & passion for my nation.

Last weekend I attended the silver jubilee of a local church. I was so impressed at the large turn-out. Despite just 25 years, this church has aggressively grown - even surpassing older churches with notable number of opportunities for growth. So, what is so spectacular? I suppose it's the leadership, strategy, and boldness. Many factors may be involved but the most important I suppose is still dependant upon the leadership.

STCM is right around the corner. The slow pace of campus happenings should be stirred pretty soon. I look forward to this and the many other activities later in the year. Mostly are the travels and ministry opportunities. A work-oriented person will still look forward to work opportunities for excitement!

SB

Isaiah 40:31

2008-04-30T11:36:00.000+08:00

It's amazing how the first 4 months of the year has swiftly flew by. I've been pretty relaxed since completing my thesis in early September last year. Things have not paced up. And honestly, I'm pretty bored being so relaxed. A little here & there will probably keep many satisfied but not me. I must see loads of task to be satisfied. Last weekend was the first field trip for the BM. Dept. We went to Perlis and it was a wonderful trip. Most important was the opportunity to know the students better. Several other field trips are planned for the year. The next small-scale one is in October. Next term, the missions term, will see many trips to various locations. And I'm travelling with a team to Northern Sumatra.

I read the Isaiah verse this morning and it sort of reminded me again of how we find strength in the Lord. Remembering this verse & observing the uphill task for a spiritual awakening refreshes my soul to persevere. I thank God that He always speaks at the right moment & knows just how to "revitalize" the weary. I want to keep pressing on for my beloved country, Malaysia. God will visit us & Penang will be His gateway to touch the nation.

Isa 40:31 But those who trust the LORD will find new strength. They will be strong like eagles soaring upward on wings; they will walk and run without getting tired.

I'm Accesible, I'm not

2008-04-04T10:51:00.000+08:00

It pretty much amaze me how some people who are in ministry, or at least they claim to be, can be so selfish. Perhaps it's the time I spent as a pastor that instill in me that ministers must be accessible to those we minister. What bothers me is to know that our newly elected ADUNs and MPs are publishing their contacts even in the papers but there are "so-called" Christian ministers who selfishly refuse to avail themselves to those they minister. Don't email me, don't call/sms my handphone, don't call my home...unreachable beyond office hours? Wow! Need to make sure any problem cropping up must happen during office hours. What breed of ministers is emerging these days? Seem to be like dead bolders that prevent mobilisation of the church!

I think Malaysians are still very caught up with political developments. I know I am. I've never been so interested in politics before, although I did a course in "Politics in Anthropology and Sociology" during my undergraduate years. The developments in the political arena has somehow affected every aspect of the Malaysian lifestyle. It somehow reveals to us that God's Spirit is moving in a "tangible" manner. I'm glad I have the opportunity to be living in Malaysia in such a time as now to witness "these." And I invite fellow Christians to keep pressing on.

SB

Outstaying our usefulness

2008-03-17T06:51:00.001+08:00

Every Malaysian is still very caught up with the unexpected change of political landscape. Rumors abound and talks of uncertainty are the main topics of discussion practically everywhere. One important lesson that we should all learn is not to overstay in our positions. It is true that some individual possess outstanding abilities and we want them to stay on a long time. But we should remember that no one is indispensable. I believe the task for all of us is to recruit replacements. What I mean is, we should always have the goal of raising new potentials and then move on. The problem with staying where we are for too long is the danger of complacency, laziness, comfort, and being too rooted that our perspectives/opinions become too narrow. My problem is for those who stay in the same position 20, 30 years. I mean, move on. Raise people and move on – that’s the real test of capability. However good you are in your area of expertise, it will amount to nothing if you fail to raise a successor. People are always afraid to loose control/power when they give away authority but as John Maxwell mentioned in one of his books, the opposite is true. I believe it is true because the more authority you give out, the more effective you’ll be. The illustration is a bar of soap. It is more useful when it is used. The more it is used, the more effective it is in fulfilling its purpose.

I think the church needs to learn this too. The church needs to adopt the vision to raise successors. No one can turn into an expert over-night. Even from this very day, we need to raise successor. We need to source potentials and invest in them to take over the rein as the next generation emerge. I pray that more will catch this vision. Old things must past. This is a spiritual pilgrimage – we journey through a life that is temporal on earth. There should always be the pilgrim’s mindset. May we all learn to be spiritually discerned to understand the times.

A Cloud of Uncertainty

2008-03-05T10:05:00.000+08:00

The General Election is just around the corner. I know many who are like me – politically ignorant. Besides that, we ask ourselves how to cast our votes wisely? We hardly know the candidates who claim to represent us. In fact, we seldom see even the shadow of them at any other times besides the few short days prior to election. The danger here is the emotional high preceding every election and human as we are, tend to be influenced by those emotions.

Uncertainty is one thing that most if not all of us are confronted with each moment. We live in the present with no certainty of what the next moment may bring. As Christians, we have a hope in the future and it is this hope that is keeping us focused; that gives us purpose and meaning; that gives us a faith to persevere the present.

For me, each time I feel discouraged or faced with some uncertainty, I turn to God’s word. In particular, I listen again to the prophecies proclaimed over my life. After all, it is these promises that had kept me going through the tough times of ministry. Yet, there still are times I question God; there are times I got angry at God; there are times I doubt God – all because I am limited within my perspective & not able to see the big picture of how God is putting things in place. Just a little while ago, I asked the Lord whether He has forgotten me. He gave me a promise but it seems like He has forgotten all about it & left me alone in a stagnant environment. I cannot understand & I feel frustrated, not willing to be comforted. Sure the head has all the right answers but the heart still refuses to accept them.

Actually, I’m pretty bored. I am someone some people would label as “workaholic.” Challenging tasks give me excitement & fulfillment. So right now, having completed my ThM, being asked to take a year’s break before proceeding to PhD, confronted with tasks I’m accustomed to for about 3 years now…I’m bored. I’m too relaxed and that’s the reason for the boredom. I’m not a person who can relax, lay back & “take it easy.” Honestly, I just do not know how to adapt to such a relaxing lifestyle. It’s just not me. Thus, I’ve been praying hard for more opportunities of challenging ministries. Pray together with me. After all, we are made to work (Gen. 2:15).

Here comes Mickey Mouse…

2008-02-05T08:43:00.000+08:00

Chinese New Year is fast approaching & I’m still able to claim my right to receive “ang-pow.” Somehow, that excitement is fast fading as I grow older. I stopped counting my age after my 33^rd birthday assuming that the following years are bonuses for me because my Lord died at 33 years of age when He hung from a cross in Calvary. Well, I’m approaching 40 and as it has been said, “Life begins at 40.” I’m waiting to see if it really does.

The Intercessory Prayer meeting in campus is progressing well thus far. We have over 10 participants so far with a few regular & some intermittent participants. But it’s good to know that God brought intercessors into campus with a burden to see a spiritual revival happening here. It’s about time we awake from spiritual slumber! I can’t wait as I anticipate the opportunity to ride upon the wings of God’s Spirit as He comes visiting our nation. I’ve had my share of “spiritual attacks” lately. Maybe it’s a good sign that the Intercessory Prayer meet is a threat to the enemy. Maybe it’s because I “activated” my spiritual gift of prophecy. While I can say

^{ECC 3:11} He has made everything beautiful in its time.

…it’s still no fun when you are in the midst of the “attack.” Yet, I am comforted with the promises of God,

^{ISA 54:17} no weapon forged against you will prevail,

and you will refute every tongue that accuses you.

This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD,

and this is their vindication from me,"

declares the LORD.

…and His wisdom,

^{ISA 55:8} "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,

neither are your ways my ways,"

declares the LORD.

^{ISA 55:9} "As the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are my ways higher than your ways

and my thoughts than your thoughts.

After the CNY break, it’s back to work. For a start, there’s the Adult Bible Class in church. Then, there are several books (in BM) due for publications; there’s a preaching engagement end of April; teaching assignments in July & October. I have sometimes quietly wish that God would let me pastor a small, closely knitted church in some sub-urb but I know that is not my calling. I can’t say that I don’t like what I’m doing which in fact, I’m having fun here dealing with Christian leaders of various denominations and missions organizations all around Asia. Yet, there’s some silent wish for a more “quieter ministry,” maybe that’s a sign of aging…where you wish for something more subtle, less turbulent, and easy-going. Because of that when I was asked to consider a part-time pastorate in a church located in the main land, I cannot just brush it aside. Instead, I did some considerations over it. Yet, the truth is, I know…my calling is to serve the universal church of God. Everything else at the local church level is the side line.

Some weeks ago, I was preaching at a church that comprises mostly of members of a church where I was a youth pastor. I’m glad of this “re-connecting” network. More glad is to know that they are still keen on missions.

So, as we welcome Mickey Mouse in this Chinese New Year I’d like to greet everyone of you, my prayer partners & friends a very Kong Xi Fa Cai.

Spiritual Revelation…of seeing and dreaming

2008-01-19T16:17:00.000+08:00

It is a big challenge to be in Christian ministry. On one hand, we see the evil around us in the world and on the other hand is the Bible that teaches us everything good. The big challenge is reconciling these two through the person of Jesus Christ. Fallen human being as we are, even upon conversion into children of a holy God, we continue our imperfect nature along the process of sanctification to Christ-likeness. Many times we face the temptation to return to our old ways. To some, they believe that when the going gets tough the tough gets going but to others they simply succumb that if you can’t beat them, join them.

I realized that it’s been a full seven years I’m in the so-called full time Christian vocation. There’s been a lot of ups and downs, moments where I came so close to giving up on full-time ministry; moments also when I came so close to giving up being a Christian. Should the Christian pilgrimage be so turbulent a journey? I don’t think so. And as I’ve discovered, it’s only for “a chosen few.” Sounds so “privileged”? As I sought after God for an understanding to this “bumpy ride,” I received an affirmation regarding a spiritual gift accorded to me. I have often foolishly believed that when one is in ministry long enough, one should naturally have spiritual wisdom/discernment. Apparently, this is not so because it is a gift that God will give to those He divinely selects. The gift of spiritual discernment and subsequently of prophecy carries huge responsibilities. To me, there is a super-thin fine line between discernment and being judgmental, and I’ve been too cautious in practicing this spiritual gift. But I’m ready to take a further step of faith to exercise the gift. I realize that I can only go further when I actually take the first step. The so-called “bumpy ride” journey as I discovered is just part and parcel of that special “calling.” Simply because, as the prophet Amos said,

^{AM 3:7} Surely the Sovereign LORD does nothing

without revealing his plan

to his servants the prophets.

It’s “scary” to see through the eyes of God. Especially on matters that are not too right happening in His church. It’s no “fun” to feel the grief of God over matters close to His heart that His under-shepherds cause a mess. Yet, and surprisingly so to our limited human understanding, it is so much a privilege to be “chosen” by God to hear His heart-beat and share in His grief. In fact, it’s an honor to be “chosen” by God to “see” what others cannot, to “feel” what others can’t, to “grief” while others “rejoice,” and to stand in the gap for my fellow believers in the faith besides teaching & preaching what the Lord lays upon my heart to convict His church.

Thus far as the Lord has taken me, I’m still being molded in the hands of the Master who is carefully “re-constructing” me into the image of His Son, Jesus. A glance through the turbulent Christian faith journey has always revealed a sense of awe at the greatness of God because,

^{Ecc. 3:11a} He has made everything beautiful in its time.

Entering 2008

2008-01-07T12:03:00.000+08:00

For almost seven years, my off day was on Monday. I took the liberty to do every possible task on Mondays. The crowd is always small on the first day of the week. However, from this year, I'm returning to be "normal" with a regular Monday-Friday work schedule. It's difficult to get use to this. I have to "learn" to join the crowd and get used to long waits.

I doubt if anyone like changes. But if we do not change, we do not grow. Besides, maintaining the status quo will only lead to being too comfortable in our comfort zones which is ideal to breed complacency. I remember one important principle from the workbook "Experiencing God," by Henry Blackaby. This Bible Study material was so very popular in the middle and late 1990s. It says we just can't remain where we are and join God. We need to move as the Spirit of God moves. And this definitely requires change, constantly.

Joh 5:17 But Jesus said, "My Father has never stopped working, and that is why I keep on working."

Ending the Year with a Huge Bang…

2007-12-30T14:54:00.000+08:00

Today is Sunday, 30^th Dec., the last Sunday of the year. I decided to attend the early service in church so I can say my little good-byes to my nephews who were here from PJ for a short holiday. I was spending time with them with great fun. My older nephew and I were playing water bombs and competing to wet each other in the wading pool of the local hotel. The next day we went to the beach. We rode on a horse and he was attracting much attention with his loud antics, much to my embarrassment actually. My younger nephew took his first step on the beach. As a typical city boy, he was afraid of it! But after seeing his brother having so much fun building “sand pyramids” he slowly stepped on to the beach and got acquainted with the sand. In fact, he began to enjoy the sand so much at the last minute, moments before it was time to leave! Praise the Lord for time spent with families, especially at year ends. It truly brings a sweet close to an ending year with fresh hopes to usher in a new year.

I wish this can be true for everyone everywhere in the world. I was shocked to hear of the assassination of Benazir Buttho. Regardless of what the media may paint her to be, both in the positive or negative light, she was truly a figure that deserves the respect of everyone. I see her as a true symbol of breakthrough for the Muslim community. In fact, I identify with her struggle. It’s never easy to exercise your gift effectively amidst a male-dominated society. I truly respect her courage and charisma in fighting for democracy and strived to bring political stability to her beloved land. She may not share my faith & belief system, but she became a symbol of gender equality and ability when she assumed her premiership however short they may be. Like most people the whole world over, I grief at the lost of this precious life.

I was disappointed when the worship service this morning chose to end the year with a joyful note as if disregarding what is happening outside its walls. Pakistan is in turmoil. Supporters of their assassinated leader are in so much grief and pain that those unable to control themselves express it through violence taking the whole nation into chaos.

What a year 2007 had been! War & political instability was and is happening around the world. Besides the current Pakistan, Myanmmar attracted worldwide attention not too long ago when Buddhist monks led in political demonstrations. Closer home, in fact, at home, some quarters attempted to cause disturbance to our nation’s harmony by injecting rumors and false claims. Sure there were joyful moments. There were also moments of tension. It has been a bitter sweet year.

Personally, it also described my journey through 2007 – bitter sweet. Sometimes, I wish God only calls me to serve faithfully in a small, closely-knitted congregation. But I know that’s not what He has for me. I’m called to serve the universal church and that put me in a position to deal with pastors and Christian leaders throughout the nation and sometimes even beyond. Many times I grieve at the thought of how some Christian leaders sold themselves for worldly acclaim. Chasing after position, titles, “power,” recognition, some even dwell in pride and intellectualism, disregarding Biblical mandate and commands…I didn’t know why the Lord chose to reveal this to me, but as I pray over it, He impressed upon me that the Lord wants me to stand in the gap. Though the situation sometimes pushed me to the edge of giving up in ministry, I know the Lord did not reveal that to me just so that I can pack my bags and leave. Instead, He chose to reveal that to me because He knew I will do something about it. However little my contribution may be to make a difference, I will be faithful to my calling. Who knows, out of this little obedience the Lord may cause a huge thing to come out of it. After all, revivals all over the world always began with one or two faithful souls.

I still resort to my “little book of encouragement.” Besides the Bible, this book written by Henry Blackaby has helped me to climb out of depressing ministry situations. Created to be God’s Friend: How God Shapes Those He Loves Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1999.

One prayer I hope many will share with me – pray for a greater fear of the Lord to come upon Christian leaders. We don’t fear God if we don’t take seriously the task He entrust to us. This means doing ministry in His way, not ours. God may have called us to be pastors or leaders but it’s foolish to do things the way we thought it should be done. Instead, when God calls us to lead, we should lead in His way. After all, the people we lead are His people.

2008 is just around the corner. I don’t know what’s in store for me, the church, the nation, or the world. But one thing I’m always sure is that God is still in control. After all, He holds the whole world in His hands as He makes all things beautiful in its own time. I do not want to be distracted – in my faith, in my focus, in my walk with the Lord. God is still God, He is still my God.

Adventures and Misadventures of Family

2007-12-05T17:25:00.000+08:00

I just took a few days off to spend some time with my nephews in PJ. God created us to experience childhood and yet observing children is so much fun. My two nephews in PJ are so much fun. One is entering standard one next year and his younger brother is turning two in about two weeks' time. It was a special kind of feeling to be with a smaller version of someone who carries a part of me. I suppose environment makes a difference to how a child is groomed, apart from inherited genes. I guess it is true of God's word that children is a gift from God and parents are to be worthy stewards to raise them in godly ways. I reflect upon my own childhood and family relations. There are good and bad in those relationships. But I have decided to learn not to repeat mistakes. Instead, to learn from the past and improve on the lacks. I hope I am able to be a good aunt to my nephews. One that can impact them with godly virtues that will guide them in their lives.

Ministry is pretty relaxing. Probably because the Seminary is on its annual year-end break right now and I'm not very involved in church yet. There are work to attend to, but not very heavy loads. It's the time of the year where things go slow as the holiday season slips in. And as we enter into another season of Christmas, I hope Christians in Malaysia will once again seize the opportunity to make known the true reason of celebrating Christmas. For God so love the world....

The Universal Church

2007-11-23T05:53:00.000+08:00

It has been a great adventure serving the Lord. As He teaches me new things and revelations, it always lead me closer to His heart. I remember about five years ago when I was seriously contemplating joining the Hannah II ship. What impressed me was the Bible School aboard the ship & they travel to small, obscure locations around Asia. Among their ministries was this teaching ministry that interest me a great deal. It was not the right time, I suppose. Today, the passion for cross-cultural missions is still very much alive within me. And the love for the universal church is very close to my heart. After all, it's only logical for a missions major to involve in missions and I've been praying, especially for the right timing. Under current circumstances, I'm not able to commit long-tem and I'm exploring short term possibilities. Thus far, there are two possibilities - Africa or Indonesia. I hope you will join me in praying & discerning for God's direction - to the right place in His time. The two areas of ministry I'm looking at are teaching & youth, both of which is possible in Ghana (Africa) or Manado (Indonesia). Will greatly appreciate your advice/comments and prayer support.

Reflecting Reflections

2007-11-22T10:16:00.000+08:00

Spirituality is subjective. Yet, human like us attempt our best effort to understand spirituality. I think we are all too familiar with the obvious channel that education feeds the head. We forgot that spirituality starts from a changed heart. Instead of the usual channel of imparting knowledge (to the head), we should understand that it all must begin from the heart. A transformed heart views every knowledge differently. Experienced faith confront knowledge differently because you are looking through the spectacles of practical faith. Christianity should be understood first & foremost through the heart, a transformed heart that changes the spirit and understanding.