Friday, October 26, 2007
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Graduation and beyond...
In about two weeks' time is MBTS's 52nd Convocation Service. I'd like to take this opportunity to extend my personal invitation to all of you to come and share with us, the goodness of God, of how He had carried us through our years of training and equipping so that we can serve Him & the Church better. I'll be graduating with ThM (Master of Theology). No, not PhD yet. I dropped out of the AGST's ThM/PhD (education) program to pursue ThM (Missiology). MBTS system requires a ThM before pursuing PhD, so i'm acquiring the ThM first. Though I'm ready to immediately continue to PhD, I was advised to take a year's break from formal study. Thus, I'll only be officially studying again after next year.
For those of you who are able, please join us at the Caring Complex on 9th Nov, 8pm. We have 45 graduating students this year (26 from English Stream & 19 from Chinese Stream). In fact, this will be the first year we are graduating a ThM in Missiology. It's probably a long weekend with the Deepavali break on 8th Nov. & Friday being a CG day for most of you. But if you're thinking of taking a break from CG, pick this date & come join us. I know, I know...it may be a bit dull. I mean, this is my 4th graduation, my 3rd from MBTS itself & many of you may be tired of receiving my graduation invites, anyway. But do come, if you are able...and be a part of what God is doing in our midst as you witness graduates completing their training & ready to make a difference for God in this generation in various nations all over the world. Hope to see you there.
Phil. 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you
For those of you who are able, please join us at the Caring Complex on 9th Nov, 8pm. We have 45 graduating students this year (26 from English Stream & 19 from Chinese Stream). In fact, this will be the first year we are graduating a ThM in Missiology. It's probably a long weekend with the Deepavali break on 8th Nov. & Friday being a CG day for most of you. But if you're thinking of taking a break from CG, pick this date & come join us. I know, I know...it may be a bit dull. I mean, this is my 4th graduation, my 3rd from MBTS itself & many of you may be tired of receiving my graduation invites, anyway. But do come, if you are able...and be a part of what God is doing in our midst as you witness graduates completing their training & ready to make a difference for God in this generation in various nations all over the world. Hope to see you there.
Phil. 1:3 I thank my God every time I remember you
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Length of Life's Journey
Saturday 20th October 2007. Today was my uncle’s funeral. He passed away in the evening last Tuesday. I just went to visit him at the nursing home on the previous Monday. Although I had a strong urge to pray for him, I did not do that. He was not himself then. His speech did not make any sense. And I know that even if I prayed for him, it would not make any difference. The funeral was conducted in the typical Chinese observance. There were both Taoist and Buddhist rituals. In fact, I had an amusing time observing the rites. I took a seat from an angle that provided me with a good view of everything that went on. So, I found myself facing as if in confrontation with 5 Buddhist monks while 3 Taoist monks performed various rituals. At the end of the rituals, the head (Buddhist) monk ridiculed the Taoist monks! I mean, he sneered at them with remarks like, “So that’s it? Monks for just one, two hours?” I was amused, and also disappointed that this so-called “head” monk, who supposedly have better self-control had actually publicly ridiculed Taoist monks!
Throughout the days after my uncle’s death leading to the funeral, I had a busy time rushing here & there in an effort to lend support to my cousins. At that time, I was the only one in my immediate family in Penang. Most relatives reside in the Klang Valley and it took them some time to travel back. Family reunions are often during weddings and funerals, so, in a way, that was a family reunion time. I had the opportunity to meet relatives I seldom meet. I met children of cousins who are so grown up, they are practically entering adulthood! I have almost always feel out of place among my relatives. Probably because I’m at the younger age group bracket and there are very few relatives in my age group. Probably because I’m a Christian and that set me apart as different from the rest. Yeah, there are some Christians among my relatives and I’m still questioning the effectiveness of us, Christians in our family, if we do not make our presence felt in family occasions. As I conversed with older relatives who are at the same generation as me, I saw the change of perspective. The older one gets, the more one focus upon the importance of family solidarity. There was a time when the topics of conversations were careers and opportunities of advancement, talks of education and opportunities of excelling materially. Perhaps, different phases of life change our perspective as we experience differing life situations. Diverse as we may be, I learnt much from observing different characters among my relatives.
Back to ministry matters. There’s been a lot of dinners and gatherings as the MBTS community prepares for the coming 52nd convocation. I thank God for the opportunity to meet and fellowship and to network with fellow ministry workers from all over the world. As we pack our bags to venture into the next phase, I pray that the Lord will continue to nurture our relationships. It’s been a great year in the missions department with many interesting characters among our students. And as I continue to seek the Lord for further equipping, I pray for the passion to impact our generation to be birthed within each of our hearts with such urgency that it spurred us to be fervent for Him in all that we do.
Throughout the days after my uncle’s death leading to the funeral, I had a busy time rushing here & there in an effort to lend support to my cousins. At that time, I was the only one in my immediate family in Penang. Most relatives reside in the Klang Valley and it took them some time to travel back. Family reunions are often during weddings and funerals, so, in a way, that was a family reunion time. I had the opportunity to meet relatives I seldom meet. I met children of cousins who are so grown up, they are practically entering adulthood! I have almost always feel out of place among my relatives. Probably because I’m at the younger age group bracket and there are very few relatives in my age group. Probably because I’m a Christian and that set me apart as different from the rest. Yeah, there are some Christians among my relatives and I’m still questioning the effectiveness of us, Christians in our family, if we do not make our presence felt in family occasions. As I conversed with older relatives who are at the same generation as me, I saw the change of perspective. The older one gets, the more one focus upon the importance of family solidarity. There was a time when the topics of conversations were careers and opportunities of advancement, talks of education and opportunities of excelling materially. Perhaps, different phases of life change our perspective as we experience differing life situations. Diverse as we may be, I learnt much from observing different characters among my relatives.
Back to ministry matters. There’s been a lot of dinners and gatherings as the MBTS community prepares for the coming 52nd convocation. I thank God for the opportunity to meet and fellowship and to network with fellow ministry workers from all over the world. As we pack our bags to venture into the next phase, I pray that the Lord will continue to nurture our relationships. It’s been a great year in the missions department with many interesting characters among our students. And as I continue to seek the Lord for further equipping, I pray for the passion to impact our generation to be birthed within each of our hearts with such urgency that it spurred us to be fervent for Him in all that we do.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Reflections…from the perspective of a single lady church minister in an Asian context
I have completed my thesis last month and it has been a time to relax. I mean, I’ve finished all of my study requirements and there’s no more pending assignments and deadlines. Probably, I’ll be pretty free till end of the year. There’s still the lacking confirmation of my roles in MBTS. All I’m certain of is I’ll still be serving in the BM Dept. & the Graduate School. The other “tasks” I’m just not sure of it yet. There’s still some coordinating to be done between MBTS & GBC concerning my ministry in MBTS.
The relaxing days allow me to think & reflect upon ministry. There are little, little things around that I was able to pick up. Perhaps it’s due to the discerning gift I received from God. Recently, I met with a senior Christian leader. He was pretty discouraging when I mentioned I intended to pursue further in my studies. Prior to that, we met to discuss about ministry. I was pretty uncomfortable when he kept saying, “So, you wish to be in this ministry…” He kept stressing on the word “wish” that after the second time, I was not feeling uncomfortable any more. I was getting upset & disappointed. Maybe it was not intended & I gave him the benefit of the doubt but he stressed the word “wish” often enough and in such a way as if I do not deserve to serve in that capacity, and it was just a wishful thinking! I confess that at that instant, my respect for this senior church leader took a plunge to almost a bottomless pit! However, I learned something from this incident. As ministers and leaders, we must dream and encourage the people that we minister. And it is so important to dream together with young ministers to encourage them and to cheer them on to reach their potentials. Perhaps this senior church leader is just being bias. After all, in most if not all Asian cultures, age and gender determines a lot of things. You have to be a man or you have to be old to do anything “significant.” Apart from these two “crucial” requirements, you are not taken seriously.
I remember earlier in the year when I was presenting a paper in a graduate seminar on Women in Missions. I mentioned that women in the corporate sector have to be twice as good to be accepted as an equal but in ministry, women ministers just have to be three times as anointed to be accepted as an equal to their male counterparts. My classmates were amused but after the class, many of them realized that I am right. The Methodist church does ordain women ministers but apparently, it is harder & longer for them to achieve that. A classmate from America shared with me that in their denomination the two persons who made a huge impact were women. A missions organization regional director told of how women were the first to volunteer to enter into difficult mission fields. After the work has been established, men will come in & eventually assume leadership!
My confession here…I’m often frustrated at the lack of ministry opportunities accorded to women. However gifted they may be. It’s extremely difficult for single women ministers. Married women often can “use” their husbands as a “platform.” It’s like as if men are threatened by capable women. Women are supposed to be submissive. If not, we are not being spiritual. It makes no sense at all. From the very beginning, God created man & woman to complement each other. Yeah, so the fall distorts the original order. But if we claim to be redeemed people, why aren’t we attempting to restore that original order? Why are we still living under the curse? Isn’t the resurrection power strong enough to break such bondage? Or maybe men acknowledge its power in every aspect except in that one area that will force them to acknowledge their equality with women? Paul acknowledged the partnership of women in ministry. Jesus himself worked with women. Why then does the modern church decide to go back in time instead? The sad truth is, there are also women ministers who will make it hard for younger women minister to progress and grow in ministry!
We thought the West should be more liberal. Apparently, it’s not. In a lesser degree perhaps but gender biasness still exists. I think it exists in every religious institutions all over the world. But my argument is that Christianity is not a religion. It is a relationship. It is a call for its followers to subscribe to a way of life that contradicts everything the world places value. We are called to be different. But as it is, how different is the church from the world? If the church promotes equality, why is there gender biasness in the church office bearers?
Maybe the failure is seen in the inability of the church to complete its discipleship program. The ultimate end of conversion should be the transformation of worldview. Every Christian should be transformed into the likeness of Christ – we all know that. But prior to that is what Paul said in Romans 12:2 “be transformed by the renewing of your mind” which urged us to transform our worldview & to adopt the Biblical worldview. Few Christian actually achieve that. Sadly to say, few Christian leaders achieve that too.
I think the culprit is our inability to differentiate the messenger’s culture, Biblical culture, and the hearer’s culture. When we failed to divorce culture from the Biblical message, we unconsciously import our worldview into the salvation message we bring to our hearers. At the end of it, we may think the Bible is teaching us something but it can actually be just a cultural element.
Thus, the challenge remains. For a single woman minister in the Christian church/organization – age & gender – these are factors that work against us in the eastern cultures. But God is not like men. He does not favor according to gender, wealth, position, etc. I believe in His time, He will turn things around. Simply because I know He still gives big dreams to both men & women. He still calls both men & women to serve Him in various capacities. He still honors both men & women who are faithful. And He is still looking for both men & women who will respond to Him and answer His trumpet call to be His end-time soldiers who will fearlessly make a difference for Him to impact nations, in this generation. And we just need to keep on in faithfulness & perseverance to allow Him to work in us and through us to transform the church, society, nation, and the world.
The relaxing days allow me to think & reflect upon ministry. There are little, little things around that I was able to pick up. Perhaps it’s due to the discerning gift I received from God. Recently, I met with a senior Christian leader. He was pretty discouraging when I mentioned I intended to pursue further in my studies. Prior to that, we met to discuss about ministry. I was pretty uncomfortable when he kept saying, “So, you wish to be in this ministry…” He kept stressing on the word “wish” that after the second time, I was not feeling uncomfortable any more. I was getting upset & disappointed. Maybe it was not intended & I gave him the benefit of the doubt but he stressed the word “wish” often enough and in such a way as if I do not deserve to serve in that capacity, and it was just a wishful thinking! I confess that at that instant, my respect for this senior church leader took a plunge to almost a bottomless pit! However, I learned something from this incident. As ministers and leaders, we must dream and encourage the people that we minister. And it is so important to dream together with young ministers to encourage them and to cheer them on to reach their potentials. Perhaps this senior church leader is just being bias. After all, in most if not all Asian cultures, age and gender determines a lot of things. You have to be a man or you have to be old to do anything “significant.” Apart from these two “crucial” requirements, you are not taken seriously.
I remember earlier in the year when I was presenting a paper in a graduate seminar on Women in Missions. I mentioned that women in the corporate sector have to be twice as good to be accepted as an equal but in ministry, women ministers just have to be three times as anointed to be accepted as an equal to their male counterparts. My classmates were amused but after the class, many of them realized that I am right. The Methodist church does ordain women ministers but apparently, it is harder & longer for them to achieve that. A classmate from America shared with me that in their denomination the two persons who made a huge impact were women. A missions organization regional director told of how women were the first to volunteer to enter into difficult mission fields. After the work has been established, men will come in & eventually assume leadership!
My confession here…I’m often frustrated at the lack of ministry opportunities accorded to women. However gifted they may be. It’s extremely difficult for single women ministers. Married women often can “use” their husbands as a “platform.” It’s like as if men are threatened by capable women. Women are supposed to be submissive. If not, we are not being spiritual. It makes no sense at all. From the very beginning, God created man & woman to complement each other. Yeah, so the fall distorts the original order. But if we claim to be redeemed people, why aren’t we attempting to restore that original order? Why are we still living under the curse? Isn’t the resurrection power strong enough to break such bondage? Or maybe men acknowledge its power in every aspect except in that one area that will force them to acknowledge their equality with women? Paul acknowledged the partnership of women in ministry. Jesus himself worked with women. Why then does the modern church decide to go back in time instead? The sad truth is, there are also women ministers who will make it hard for younger women minister to progress and grow in ministry!
We thought the West should be more liberal. Apparently, it’s not. In a lesser degree perhaps but gender biasness still exists. I think it exists in every religious institutions all over the world. But my argument is that Christianity is not a religion. It is a relationship. It is a call for its followers to subscribe to a way of life that contradicts everything the world places value. We are called to be different. But as it is, how different is the church from the world? If the church promotes equality, why is there gender biasness in the church office bearers?
Maybe the failure is seen in the inability of the church to complete its discipleship program. The ultimate end of conversion should be the transformation of worldview. Every Christian should be transformed into the likeness of Christ – we all know that. But prior to that is what Paul said in Romans 12:2 “be transformed by the renewing of your mind” which urged us to transform our worldview & to adopt the Biblical worldview. Few Christian actually achieve that. Sadly to say, few Christian leaders achieve that too.
I think the culprit is our inability to differentiate the messenger’s culture, Biblical culture, and the hearer’s culture. When we failed to divorce culture from the Biblical message, we unconsciously import our worldview into the salvation message we bring to our hearers. At the end of it, we may think the Bible is teaching us something but it can actually be just a cultural element.
Thus, the challenge remains. For a single woman minister in the Christian church/organization – age & gender – these are factors that work against us in the eastern cultures. But God is not like men. He does not favor according to gender, wealth, position, etc. I believe in His time, He will turn things around. Simply because I know He still gives big dreams to both men & women. He still calls both men & women to serve Him in various capacities. He still honors both men & women who are faithful. And He is still looking for both men & women who will respond to Him and answer His trumpet call to be His end-time soldiers who will fearlessly make a difference for Him to impact nations, in this generation. And we just need to keep on in faithfulness & perseverance to allow Him to work in us and through us to transform the church, society, nation, and the world.
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Your Promise Lord, is Like the Dawn of Each Day
JANJI-MU SEPERTI FAJAR
Ketika ku hadapi kehidupan ini, When I face this life,
Jalan mana yang harus ku pilih, And question the way I should chose,
Ku tahu ku tak mampu, I know I'm not capable,
Ku tahu ku tak sanggup, I know I'm not able,
Hanya Kau Tuhan, tempat jawapan-ku. Only You Lord has my answers.
Aku pun tahu ku tak pernah sendiri, I know I'm never alone,
Sebab Kau Allah yang mengendong-ku, You're a God who carries me,
Tangan-Mu membelai-ku, Your hand gently caressing me,
Cinta-Mu memuaskan-ku, Your love satisfies me,
Kau mengangkat-ku ke tempat yang tinggi. You lift me to a higher place.
Janji-Mu seperti fajar pagi hari, Your promises Lord is like the dawn of a new day,
Yang tiada pernah terlambat bersinar, It's never too late to shine,
Cinta-Mu seperti sungai yang mengalir, Your love is like a flowing stream,
Dan ku tahu betapa dalam kasih-Mu. And I know how deep is your love.
This song especially, and several others have been playing over and over in my head for the last couple of days, or weeks. I'm captivated by the passion of the carefully crafted words of the writer who seeks after God and being assured of His promises that will never come too late. If you listen to its original singer who sings with much passion, you will also want to listen to it - over and over again. My earlier blog entry actually gave links to the YouTube video of these songs. The one song that sings itself constantly in my head these couple of days is sung by the same singer. This is the song:
SEPERTI YANG KAU INGINI
Jalan mana yang harus ku pilih, And question the way I should chose,
Ku tahu ku tak mampu, I know I'm not capable,
Ku tahu ku tak sanggup, I know I'm not able,
Hanya Kau Tuhan, tempat jawapan-ku. Only You Lord has my answers.
Aku pun tahu ku tak pernah sendiri, I know I'm never alone,
Sebab Kau Allah yang mengendong-ku, You're a God who carries me,
Tangan-Mu membelai-ku, Your hand gently caressing me,
Cinta-Mu memuaskan-ku, Your love satisfies me,
Kau mengangkat-ku ke tempat yang tinggi. You lift me to a higher place.
Janji-Mu seperti fajar pagi hari, Your promises Lord is like the dawn of a new day,
Yang tiada pernah terlambat bersinar, It's never too late to shine,
Cinta-Mu seperti sungai yang mengalir, Your love is like a flowing stream,
Dan ku tahu betapa dalam kasih-Mu. And I know how deep is your love.
This song especially, and several others have been playing over and over in my head for the last couple of days, or weeks. I'm captivated by the passion of the carefully crafted words of the writer who seeks after God and being assured of His promises that will never come too late. If you listen to its original singer who sings with much passion, you will also want to listen to it - over and over again. My earlier blog entry actually gave links to the YouTube video of these songs. The one song that sings itself constantly in my head these couple of days is sung by the same singer. This is the song:
SEPERTI YANG KAU INGINI
Bukan dengan barang fana Not with perishable things
Kau membayar dosaku You have paid for my sins
Dengan darah yang mahal But with precious blood
Tiada noda dan cela Without dirt and fault
Bukan dengan emas perak Not with gold or silver
Kau menebus diriku You redeemed me
Oleh segenap kasih But with complete love
Dan pengorbananMu And Your sacrifice
Kutelah mati dan tinggalkan I have died and left behind
Cara hidupku yang lama My old ways of life
Semuanya sia-sia dan tak berarti lagi They are useless and meaningless
Hidup ini kuletakkan This life I lay
Pada mezbahMu ya Tuhan At Your altar oh God
Jadilah padaku seperti yang Kau ingini Made me to be as You desire
What captivated me most about the lyrics is the chorus that echoes my desire to die to my old self because those things no longer hold any meaning. They are all useless. And this life I lay at the altar of God, asking Him to mold me as He wants.
This morning, I led the dawn prayer meeting in campus. I must confess that I am sieged by the conviction of personal revival. This is a recent revelation I received as I meditated on the theme for the morning prayer. I want to be more in love with God. I want to receive a fresh awakening and to chase after things of God with such fervency - it will be as if I've never known God before. I pray for a renewed passion to run after Him, to long after Him, and to thirst for Him with such unquechable thirst that makes me desire Him as how the deer pants for streams of water. May revival come, and may it start from within my heart. May spiritual awakening come, and may it start from a weak spirit within me that longs to be awakened to the trumpet call of the Living God. May I draw closer to Him, who is my Father...my eternal Father who always gives me when I ask, who never lets me walk alone, who is always beside me and for me. My father who is eternal...my God who looks from the highest heaven.
Kau membayar dosaku You have paid for my sins
Dengan darah yang mahal But with precious blood
Tiada noda dan cela Without dirt and fault
Bukan dengan emas perak Not with gold or silver
Kau menebus diriku You redeemed me
Oleh segenap kasih But with complete love
Dan pengorbananMu And Your sacrifice
Kutelah mati dan tinggalkan I have died and left behind
Cara hidupku yang lama My old ways of life
Semuanya sia-sia dan tak berarti lagi They are useless and meaningless
Hidup ini kuletakkan This life I lay
Pada mezbahMu ya Tuhan At Your altar oh God
Jadilah padaku seperti yang Kau ingini Made me to be as You desire
What captivated me most about the lyrics is the chorus that echoes my desire to die to my old self because those things no longer hold any meaning. They are all useless. And this life I lay at the altar of God, asking Him to mold me as He wants.
This morning, I led the dawn prayer meeting in campus. I must confess that I am sieged by the conviction of personal revival. This is a recent revelation I received as I meditated on the theme for the morning prayer. I want to be more in love with God. I want to receive a fresh awakening and to chase after things of God with such fervency - it will be as if I've never known God before. I pray for a renewed passion to run after Him, to long after Him, and to thirst for Him with such unquechable thirst that makes me desire Him as how the deer pants for streams of water. May revival come, and may it start from within my heart. May spiritual awakening come, and may it start from a weak spirit within me that longs to be awakened to the trumpet call of the Living God. May I draw closer to Him, who is my Father...my eternal Father who always gives me when I ask, who never lets me walk alone, who is always beside me and for me. My father who is eternal...my God who looks from the highest heaven.
BAPA YANG KEKAL
Kasih yang sempurna Perfect love
Telah, ku trima dari-Mu I have received from You
Bukan karna, kebaikan-ku Not because of my own goodness
Hanya, oleh kasih karunia-Mu Only because of your gift of love
Kau pulihkan aku You revived me
Layakkan-ku, tuk dapat memanggil-Mu Bapa Made me worthy to call You Father
Kau bri yang ku pinta You give what I ask
Saat ku mencari ku mendapatnya The moment I seek I find it
Ku ketuk pintu-Mu I knock at Your door
Dan Kau buka-kan And You open it
Kau-lah Bapa-ku, Bapa yang kekal You're my Father, my eternal Father
Tak kan Kau biarkan You never let me
Aku melangkah hanya sendirian Walk alone
Kau selalu ada, bagi-ku You're always with me
Kau-lah Bapa-ku, Bapa yang kekal.You're my Father, my eternal Father
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